Rescue 12 responding, p.7
Rescue 12 Responding, page 7
Jonathan tapped David on the forearm then pointed to a young girl surrounded by a handful of helping friends as they were walking up to the display. She was a particularly pale girl whose face was swollen from tears. Her long, brown hair lay stringy on her shoulders. Dark lines of mascara streaked her face. Quickly, instinctively, she reached up and pulled her hair behind her ears. David smiled at Jonathan as they each noticed the quantity and shapes of the many earrings in each of her ears. The most eye-catching was a large silver cross that hung from her right ear. Jonathan whispered, “Hey, isn’t that girl from the scene where the kids died?”
David nodded as he recognized her and remembered seeing her sit in the back of the police car on the night of this tragedy. He watched her closely as she leaned up and touched the large picture of Tommy. She suddenly paled and began to collapse. The paramedics rapidly slipped in behind this circle of teenagers, and instantly, Jonathan grabbed one arm and David grabbed the other and gently laid her down to the ground. Within seconds, the girl awakened to find herself staring into the faces of two strangers. “Where am I?” she asked, her voice cracking with exhaustion. Her head leaned against David’s arm.
“You are at the memorial service. How do you feel now?” Jonathan took the lead with this patient’s care. “What’s your name?” he gently asked.
Debra’s soft brown eyes, so full of emotion, looked up to Jonathan. She needed his strength. She sat up and straightened her clothes, “My name is Debra. I am fine, I guess it was too much for me.” Her eyes filled with tears, “Tommy was my,” she paused, “he was my friend,” As she gained control of herself, her voice hardened as she realized everyone was staring at her, “Can I stand up?”
“Only if you let us help,” Jonathan said, taking her hand.
Debra stood up, leaned forward, regained her balance and took a deep breath saying, “I am fine.” She nodded curtly and quickly walked away. Embarrassed, as well as grieving, she just wanted to leave this service as quickly as possible. A young man had been watching from the shadows against the far wall. When Debra began to move forward, he quickly joined her. He looked around at all the teenagers coming towards them and cast an angry look at the approaching crowd, warning them away. He whispered something in Debra’s ear, and she nodded at him. David watched as the two teenagers left the auditorium. She looked relieved to be taken so quickly from the gym, and the two paramedics returned to scanning the crowd.
“I sure hope these kids find a way to vent some of this depression or else we’ll see some of them on our streets,” Jonathan spoke softly, looking around at the assembly.
“Let’s hope not. I don’t think the school could take another heartbreak like this. But you’re right. What’s your bet? Suicide or drunken car accident?” David said and grimaced as he considered the reality of this real risk.
“My bet is we’ll see both. But I will bet you on who it will be!”
“Sick paramedic street humor! You and me, we’ve worked the streets too long. I won’t bet this time. These kids took too much out of me. My senses are shot.” David looked around the room at the countless teenagers who were overcome with grief. He knew Jonathan was right. Which one or ones would it be…?
David left the memorial service empty and exhausted. He entered his bedroom for solitude, his emotions drained. The death of these teenagers weighed heavily on his heart, and in that weight, questions and doubts pressed against the foundation of his new-found faith.
Hopelessness was surprised when he found a crack in David’s spiritual wall. Seeing the opportunity, he slithered in around David’s mind, like a python moving slowly to entrap his prey. Hopelessness wrapped around and squeezed David’s emotions. As he did, David heard the dark knowledge of the hopelessness of all people. He surrendered to the pressure of these thoughts and, like every person before him, asked, “What’s the point? Was there no hope?” David cried as he lay alone on his bed.
Hopelessness began to revel in his new strength, when suddenly, the one he was a perversion of, showed up. Godly Sorrow entered the bedroom, “Leave, you have been done away with!” Godly Sorrow spoke to Hopelessness with the authority of his position.
“No, this man has let me in! I will stay.” Hopelessness knew he had no right to be there, but bluffing was one of his strongest weapons.
“He has known you long enough. He shall know the truth and shall be set free.”
“You… you will bring him more tears than me,” Hopelessness scoffed at Godly Sorrow, “You don’t offer freedom. There is only freedom in the Dark. Let us see which of us he prefers. The one he rejects will leave in shame. Let us see who he will understand better; the hopelessness of man or Godly Sorrow, which shall lead to Repentance.” Hopelessness’s words turned from scoffing to baiting Godly Sorrow. “Don’t think for a moment that I don’t know that Strength remains outside, just waiting to be called on.”
Godly Sorrow, no longer speaking to the dark warrior, turned and gently touched David’s shoulder. Suddenly David began to cry a little harder. A new part of his heart opened. David cried out to the God he was honestly trying to understand. He had never felt the weight of all the death and destruction he had seen before. His mental wall had always protected him from the emotional consequences of all he had witnessed. But now… now there was only sorrow.
He wept for all the lives he had seen destroyed and pain he had touched as a paramedic. Gradually his emotions were spent, his heart quieted. He laid still and started to think beyond the pain. He heard a new voice, the voice of Godly Sorrow, “If God is Love and Light – then whatever is not of love is not of God; then evil must be anything that separates from God…” David made room in his mind for these new thoughts, letting them take root and grow. He began again to consider the rescue calls in light of these thoughts. Good people have been destroyed by someone choosing to do something NOT in love. Rape, murder, drunk drivers, child abuse… all the worst calls have been done by someone doing something not in love but in self-satisfaction.
Again, Godly Sorrow turned David’s thoughts away from the failures of others and back to his own choices. The images in his mind were cruel in their truthful rendering of David’s decisions. The images were too real, too close to his heart. In his anguish, he again began to cry, and to cry out to God, “I’m so sorry. I’m hopeless on my own to do what’s right, and I have hurt others. I don’t have a right to your forgiveness, but please, forgive me…” David felt something inside his heart, like water washing over him. This sensation, like the tears he had shed, was cleansing his soul. Hopelessness closed his eyes to block the light radiating from one of the strongest spirits of the Good One. This warrior could defeat any weapon of darkness. Repentance entered on the wings of tears and joy.
Hopelessness turned to Godly Sorrow. “You have been strengthened. We will do battle again.” He crawled out through the crack of protection around David and lamented, “Was I used to lead this human to recognize his hopeless condition without the Good One? I was used to bring a man to Godly Sorrow!” This thought choked Hopelessness and tormented him, "The Good One used me.” He slithered back into his hole. The Adversary would not be pleased.
The victorious warriors sang a song of the heavens in unison, and David heard. Strange words came to David’s mind. He knew they were not his own words and spoke of things he did not understand, but he knew they were true.
“There is no one like my God,
From Hill to Valley,
I shall proclaim Your Glory;
You have lifted up the cup of Salvation,
You have filled it.
You shall speak your word to the poor,
And proclaim liberty to the bound,
Freedom and Joy are the wings of the Spirit.
By these two You can judge the Dark.
Whether it is of God or man,”
The Spirit of God spoke from within him, “Be at peace and arise. Go to the funeral of the two women. You will have your answer.”
David knew he must obey that which he did not understand and could never explain. He would follow this life-changing adventure. Joy covered him like an oil. Every hair, every aspect of him felt God’s presence. He slept in the arms of God and awoke with a plan, a direction, and he knew – an answer.
Chapter Four
Wednesday:
Divine Connection and Demonic Captivity
Wednesday morning sunrise found David awake and expectant. Life had become an adventure. His heart was full of gratitude, and his mind was at peace. He considered how he could share this with Jan, his wife. He could hear her moving around in the kitchen, so he slowly got up to join her before she had to leave for work. She was definitely going to be shocked.
“Good morning, sweetheart! Glad to see you up so early. I already read the paper. And, it is waiting for you on the table.” Jan said as she rushed to their kids’ rooms.
David sat down with his coffee and picked up the local paper and waited for her return. It was filled with the headline of the memorial service yesterday. He looked at the pictures of the three teenagers who had died, and the pictures of classmates, shown holding each other and crying. Did any of them get it? Would any one of them have the courage to stay off drugs? David wondered and then shook the paper as he flipped to the back section, and the cynicism of so many years as a paramedic caused the whispered answer, “I doubt it.”
“Doubt what, dear?” a rushing voice was heard from the kitchen.
“Oh, I was talking to myself,” David put down the paper and looked over the counter toward his wife who was busy fixing some cereal for herself and the kids. “I was reading the paper about the kids at the memorial service, that’s all. It is so frustrating to face the death of these kids, knowing our own will be that age soon.”
Jan walked toward David with coffee in one hand and a bowl in the other. They kissed as she sat down. “How are you doing with all this stuff?”
“It’s weird. But, I have been thinking about a lot lately. I really want to tell you about it.” A wave of emotions caught him off guard, and he didn’t know where to start, “But, right now I just think I need some time to make sense of it all.”
“You know, it might be a good idea for you to take off Sunday and just relax. I am here for you, when you are ready. I know it sometimes takes you a while to process all you deal with at work.”
David moved the papers to one side and touched her hand in gratefulness, “I might just do that. Are you still planning on going to the beach?”
“Of course. Mom and I are looking forward to the weekend with the kids together. Dad doesn’t want to go. Says it is still too cold for him. It has to be summer before he wants to get in the water. So, if you wanna just stay here, that’s OK too. But, you are welcome to join us.”
David looked at the faces of the teenagers staring from the front page, “Let me see if I can get the day off. Maybe I could get an extra day away from there.”
“So, you didn’t answer me. How are you doing with all these deaths?” Jan’s deep blue eyes penetrated David’s, and he quickly looked down and flipped the paper open to the second page.
“Well, I wanna really talk to you about all this. Last night while you were out, I thought about a lot of things. But you don’t have time, the kids need to get to school, and you need to get to work. I promise that tonight we can talk, ok?”
“Alright, I’ll let you off the hook because you’re right. I don’t have time. But, not tonight, I will be in late again. Promise you’ll talk to me later.”
David looked up at his wife of eleven years, “Sure, it’s a date. Hopefully, I’ll have even more to tell you then.” With that look, she knew he would tell her when they had time, and that he would be alright.
His eyes returned to the paper. There, in the back section, was a small notice about another funeral. The paper stated it was for two women “fatally injured” in a car accident. “That sounds better than ‘creamed by a semi-truck,’ I guess,” David mumbled. He knew these ladies must have died instantly. “I bet they didn’t even know what hit them.” He looked up, noticing that Jan had left, and he had again been talking to himself.
The hot steam from his cup reminded David of the steam from the truck’s broken radiator. His mind replayed the accident, point by point. David constantly found himself replaying the rescue calls, to see if there was anything he could have done better. There was always at least one thing that he wished could have been done differently, but this call went very smoothly. However, to lose two women without even a fight was a shame. If only there were more ambulances, more hands on the scene soon enough. Stress lines forced their way across his brow, his mind was haunted by their faces. Would that have saved even one of the two women? He knew he would never know the answer to that question, and he knew it wouldn’t be the last time he asked it. He continued to read the obituary. It stated that the service would be held at Crossroads Church to accommodate the large expected attendance, with the Reverend Timothy McDonald to officiate.
He knew where this church was, everyone in town did. They called it The Happy Church. Until yesterday, he thought that was a strange name for a church. But, if those people felt what he felt last night, no wonder they’re happy. “Maybe it’s about time for me to go to church.”
“Daddy, Daddy! Good morning!” Tiffany ran to her father’s lap and kissed him.
“So much for the paper,” David said with a laugh, putting down the paper and looking fondly at his seven-year-old daughter. “Good morning to you, princess!” Tiffany loved it when her Daddy kissed her. She giggled and ran off to the next recipient of her morning ritual.
Sam, the large Doberman, looked up slowly, mocking the child’s energy. Sam thought himself too sophisticated to show that much attention to the girl. His pointed ears stood up, and his brown eyes gave away his true affection for his young keeper. He would patiently endure her hugs and kisses. She hugged him so tightly that he stood up from his mat, lifting her from the floor, shook his head and licked the child. She had her kiss, and so she continued to the next person on her morning travels. Sam walked in a tight circle, and then returned to his place. The dog watched as she ran into the other bedroom.
“MOM, MOM, get Tiffany out of here!”
Tiffany had made it to her younger brother’s room. David laughed, “Tiffany, leave your brother alone.” His voice seemed stern. She knew better.
“Alright, Tiff, come in here and have breakfast,” this voice was not one to push. She immediately left her brother’s room and came into the kitchen. This time her mother had called.
“Good morning, Mommy. I – love – you,” she said, stretching each word to the maximum as were her arms as she reached all the way around her mother’s soft belly.
“Good morning to you, sweetie.” The ritual was completed.
Sounds of the refrigerator door swinging open and shut, and Mommy’s orders filled the kitchen. Kids ran in and out of rooms as they both hurriedly kissed their parents. The front door was left open as Matthew ran to catch up with his sister. Jan stood watching until her kids entered their school bus. “David, I’m leaving now. See you at 6:00. Would you get dinner started tonight?”
He got up and walked to the front door. He kissed Jan as she bent over to pick up her purse. “Sure. You got the stuff in the fridge ready, or is it whatever I want to fix?”
“Nope, nothing in there special. You’ll just have to surprise me with whatever you want. I don’t care.” Jan reached into her purse for her keys. “Oh yeah, and don’t forget to take the dog to the vet today. They said they need to keep him overnight.”
“Well, I guess I can protect us tonight. Sure, I’ll take him later.”
Jan kissed David again as she ran out the front door.
David walked to the table with the newspaper and returned to his own thoughts. As he sat down, the emotional weight of the recent calls stirred in his mind. His eyes were drawn to his hands, and he noticed again the multiple small scars from the countless windshields that cut his hands as he reached for his patients. Staring at the scars, his mind focused on last night’s mental war. “What is the point? That was the question. Today I’ll find the answer.” He rarely went to the funerals of his patients because it was too depressing. His job was hard enough as it was, but there was a point to all of this. David just knew there was some reason he needed to be at both services, but what? What would he discover? He realized he was looking forward to the funeral today.
An angry young man walked forcefully towards two ornately carved, mahogany doors at the entrance of an impressive office in downtown Tampa. A large sign stood above the entrance, R. Summerall - Imports. Joey’s fists were clenched, and his body was rigid. He stopped at the doors and glanced quickly down the hallway, finding it free of observers. He pushed the heavy doors open and entered alone.
Two strong, well-defined and well-dressed men stood on alert just inside the office and immediately escorted him to his destination. The young man looked at these men as they hurried him down the corridor. Their handsome faces were lost in the darkness of their evil eyes. Apparently, pleasant interaction with the visitors was not the norm.
The spirits of Fear and Anger, while unseen, were also present with this angry visitor. Fear baited him to run, and his heart began to race. But, it was Anger who controlled his thoughts, and it was the voice of Anger he heard loudest. Anger enjoyed his control of this young man too much to allow Fear much volume. Anger reached over and blew into the ear of his toy. His voice was slow and hot, “He knew better. He set you up. You are in danger because of his error. The coke you sold Tommy will get you killed, and it’s all his fault. He was careless, and they all died.” The wind of Anger blew into the soul of this young man. Fear was immediately squelched by these strong thoughts. He waited, though, for he knew he would get to torment this fool soon.
