Farzanas spite, p.22
Farzana's Spite, page 22
“Do you carry knives with you everywhere?” Farzana asked in a whisper.
She nodded. “Of course.”
Of course.
“Can I see?”
She hesitated before reaching in her jacket pockets and pulling out two curved bars of metal. With a flick of her wrists, blades sprang out of the handles, their warped edges shining.
Farzana felt sick.
“Okay, you can put them away now,” she said in a small voice.
Ettares gave her a sad smile and flicked her wrists again; the blades vanished. Replacing the bars in her pockets, she said, “I don’t go anywhere without them.”
And that was the only reason Farzana was still alive. Ettares saved her; no matter how gruesome the outcome, Farzana was grateful. She would never be able to repay her.
“Thank you,” Farzana said again, reaching for Ettares's hand.
Ettares fingers curled around hers, and her eyes shone as she looked at Farzana. “I would do it all over again for you.”
“I hope you don’t have to.”
They sat in silence, their fingers intertwined, before Ettares cleared her throat and released her. The empty spaces between Farzana’s fingers were a vice on her throat, strangling her until Ettares spoke.
“I’ll try to visit you every day. And I’ll teach you more self-defense.”
Farzana’s heart skipped a beat as she took a deep breath. “I’d like that.”
“Good,” she said with a grin. “See you tomorrow, Farzana.”
“See you tomorrow, Ettares.”
FARZANA SPENT THE morning lounging in bed, waiting for Ettares to show up and wondering what Araj was up to. When the afternoon sun slanted through her windows and neither of them had shown up, she decided to get up and go for a walk. Maybe she would run into one of them in the halls. If nothing else, she could go visit Enzi or Sitra and ask about Laraf. As much as Farzana knew that keeping her away from The Center was the right thing, living alone again after living with Laraf was proving to be an adjustment. She missed her little sister.
Farzana made her way with careful steps, leaning on her cane for support and watching her feet. As she rounded a corner, she noticed a pair of imp guards standing close together, whispering. At first, she wondered if they were there to keep an eye on her, and her heartbeat thundered with panic at the idea of being trapped in her room. She tried to retreat but ended up tripping on her cane, alerting the imps to her presence.
When they turned to her, their faces bore identical sneers; then they turned and left her alone in the hall.
A weird feeling sat in the pit of Farzana’s stomach. What could they have been whispering about, hidden in a back hallway? At least they didn’t seem to be there to guard her, which meant she was free to roam, right? Regardless, she now had an urge to run back to her room, where she felt safe.
She chuckled darkly to herself as she turned back around, though it felt more like a sob than laughter. Safety was a luxury she couldn’t afford. She was safe so long as she obeyed…and so long as Erasto ignored her. She shivered, chilled to the bone.
Back in her room, Farzana drew a bath and floated on her back for a while, letting the heated water soothe her muscles and warm her to the core. When would Ettares show up? Cupping water in her hands, she let it drip down onto her body, the droplets sliding down her sides, tickling her as they went. If she closed her eyes, the water felt like a warm hug, like someone carrying her in the safety of their arms. She wrapped her own arms around herself.
Ettares said she would visit. And yet…
Farzana turned on the mirror and tried to call Ettares only to have a message pop up that read ‘Could not complete call.’ Frowning, she tried to call Araj and received the same message. After attempting to call the House of Amber and seeing the message a third time, she gave up. Of course Erasto had removed her only way of communicating with the outside world. Why was this coming as a surprise?
Farzana lay on her bed and resorted to flipping through channels. Channel after channel, random faerie after random faerie. She stopped on a scene of chaos: a riot taking place outside the palace gates. Why would anyone be protesting at the palace? Surely it was abandoned, since Erasto had set up headquarters in his Center?
The screams reverberated in her room, and she shut off the mirror, disturbed. Despite losing his wight army, Erasato’s plan to instill chaos on Fearth seemed to be working well. The country would tear itself apart in the search for justice, though the fact that imps were being blamed wasn’t fair, considering it was Erasto’s policy that was stealing jobs. What would it take to sate his thirst for destruction? How long until Dradour fell into anarchy? And if it did, would Erasto finally leave them? Farzana couldn’t imagine Erasto simply slinking away with his victory. There had to be something bigger than that in his mind. And gods only knew if anyone would be able to stop him before then.
Alone in the silence, she found herself nodding, eyes drooping and vision blurring. It was getting late, and she hadn’t napped all day. She was so…so tired…
“Hey.”
Farzana jerked awake, eyes wide. Ettares stood at the end of the bed, looking at her.
“I let myself in. You really should keep your door locked.”
Farzana blinked at her.
“And I’m sorry I’m so late. Do you still want to hang out?”
“Yes!” Farzana sat upright. “I do.”
“You’re sure? You’re not too tired?”
“I’m wide awake,” Farzana said with a smile. “Promise.”
Ettares grinned, showing her crooked fangs. “Okay. What do you want to do?”
Farzana pondered that for a moment. What would make her happy? “I wish I could go for a walk, but like, a real walk. Outside.”
“Why don’t we?”
Farzana raised an eyebrow, scoffing. “Because Erasto would be furious.”
“Look,” she said, hooking a stray curl behind her ear, “you can stay here, locked up forever, or you can go outside and breathe some fresh air and take a damn walk. We’ll take a guard with us.”
The idea of going outside for the first time in who knew how long was overwhelming; it was a compulsion. “Let’s do it,” Farzana said with excitement.
“Great!” Ettares bounced over to the closet. “Do you have a coat?”
“I should.”
Ettares helped her bundle up and then they left, took the lift to the ground floor, and walked up to the imp guards at the front entrance. Farzana’s anxiety spiked as they approached the guards. What if they recognized Ettares? What if they called Erasto?
“Excuse me, we need an escort,” Ettares said.
The imps stared at her with a bored expression before exchanging a glance. “Where are you going?” asked the masc-fae imp.
“We want to take a walk. Farzana needs the fresh air.”
He grunted then motioned for the fem-fae imp to go with the two of them. Satisfied, Ettares linked her arm with Farzana’s; together, they walked out the front doors.
Farzana stopped on the sidewalk and stared. The trees were bare of any leaves; the remnants of the dressage lay on the ground in colorful mounds and danced across the street in the breeze. She pulled in a breath of crisp air and shivered with delight. How could she have stayed inside for so many days? She had missed the remainder of autumn. Soon the frost would come, and it would truly be winter.
Hit with the urge to stare at the stars, she craned her neck to look up and was disappointed to see what little of the sky wasn’t blocked by buildings was obscured by the glow of the streetlamps.
“I want to see the stars,” Farzana murmured.
Ettares squeezed her hand. “I know just the place.”
They walked for almost an hour, stopping several times so Farzana could rest her leg and catch her breath. The imp guard shadowed them the whole time, silent and part of the surrounding night. Ettares kept Farzana’s spirits up by telling her it was just a bit farther, just a little bit farther.
“Here it is,” she said at last, gesturing at the park before them.
Farzana was stunned. A little outcropping of trees whispered forest. A pond sat before them, and a multitude of tiny flowers dotted the tall grass, reaching for the sky with all their might. With no buildings anywhere nearby, the stars shone crystal clear across the dark blanket of night.
She knelt on the ground, feeling the grass between her fingers, exhausted but exhilarated. Why had she never gone to parks before? The City felt far away; she couldn’t hear any sounds other than the murmur of water over stone and the rustle of naked tree boughs.
A waterhorse, freed from its trolley, emerged from the water and stood at the edge of the pond, watching them. Its ears pricked forward as they took a step closer, and with a gentle whuff, it wandered over.
Having never seen a freed waterhorse, Farzana was mesmerized. It was magnificent. The black hide was velvet beneath her fingers, and its coarse mane moved as though it was underwater. She gazed into its glowing red eyes. Was this how it tricked faeries into getting onto its back and following it into the depths, never to be seen again? Farzana wouldn’t mind that. It sounded much more pleasant than being under Erasto’s control.
“Hey,” Ettares said, snapping her from her reverie. Her hands were tight on Farzana’s, and only then did Farzana realize she had been in the process of mounting the waterhorse.
Shaken, she allowed Ettares to extricate her hands from the mane and pull her close. With a disappointed snort, the waterhorse turned and headed back to the pond, submerging itself and leaving no sign of its presence other than the rapidly fading ripples on the water’s dark surface.
“I…tried to mount a waterhorse,” Farzana said with a laugh of dismay. “Oh gods.” She turned to look at the guard sheepishly only to see her with her back to them, staring back at The City.
“I wouldn’t let you do that,” Ettares said with a gentle smile as she released her hold on Farzana.
“Thank you. That’s twice you’ve saved my life now.”
A crimson stain worked its way up Ettares's neck and splashed across her face. “It’s nothing, really,” she said, her voice low and husky.
Farzana reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Well, it means a lot to me.”
“Did I ever tell you my favorite animal is the waterhorse?” Ettares said, changing the subject. “I even wanted to own one when I was a wee little fae babe.”
Farzana stared at her, confused. “You wanted to own a waterhorse? Like, enslave it?”
“No! Gods no, nothing like that. I wanted a pet, that’s all. I didn’t know at the time that only water nymphs could tame them.” She chuckled. “Imagine my heartbreak when I found out.”
“Who told you?”
“One of my nannies. I told her I wished I could have been born a water nymph instead of a pixie noble.”
“And what did she say?” Farzana asked, sitting down in the grass and kicking out her legs.
Ettares settled beside her, her posture impeccable. “She told me I was a spoiled brat who didn’t deserve to be a noble anyway.”
“Sounds like a mean nanny.”
“She was actually my favorite! She was the only one who didn’t treat me like a little prince.”
“How refreshing,” Farzana said dryly.
Farzana had never considered that a noble would want for anything; they were the richest of the rich, the top social caste right after purebloods. If Queen Tatiana hadn’t eventually bore a child, they all would have been in line for the throne. How funny that the only thing Ettares had ever wanted that she couldn’t have was a beautiful waterhorse.
They laid back on the grass, looking up at the stars. Ettares pointed out different constellations for her, naming famous pixie heroes, gods, and goddesses. Lulled by that soothing voice, Farzana tucked her head into Ettares's side and found herself falling asleep.
“Farzana,” Ettares said, shaking her awake. “We have to go back.”
“Why can’t we stay?” she whined.
“Because if we are still gone when Erasto wakes up, he’ll send guards to your grandparents’ house to try and find you.”
That thought had her groaning and sitting up. “Yeah, let’s go.”
Ettares handed Farzana her cane and helped her to her feet, and they set off on the trek back to The Center, their watchful guard close behind them.
The sky began to lighten as the dawn approached; stars disappeared one by one, replaced by red and orange threads of light. In silence, they made their way through The City as it slowly came to life around them.
CHAPTER 30
ARAJ WAS PACING the length of the sitting room when Farzana and Ettares entered the suite; his eyes lit up with fury as soon as he saw Ettares. “What on Faerth were you doing?” he yelled, throwing his hands in the air. “How could you be so reckless and irresponsible?”
Farzana bristled with anger at his words, shutting the door behind her and leaning back against it. “Excuse me? You want to talk about reckless behavior now?”
“Where were you?” he asked, crossing his arms.
“None of your business,” snapped Ettares. She shifted forward toward Araj and, in a panic, Farzana reached out and grabbed her arm. Ettares relaxed back on her heels and turned to face her, a wry smile on her lips. “I guess I should go…. Are you going to be okay?” Her eyes flickered between Farzana and Araj with obvious concern.
“I’ll be fine,” Farzana said with a forced smile. “Go.”
“Yeah, run away. You’re good at that,” Araj called as Ettares left the room with her head held high.
“Gods, what is wrong with you?” Farzana asked, hobbling to the bed and sitting down. Her legs ached from the long walk, and her joints were tender from having to lean on the cane for support.
“What’s wrong with me? What is wrong with you? I can’t believe you. After everything that happened, you were going to put your family through even more misery?”
Farzana glared daggers at him, her vision blurring with tears at his insinuation. “What is that supposed to mean? I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“How could you go back to their house and put them in danger, put Laraf in danger? Enzi almost lost his job because of you.”
“Because of me?” Farzana said with incredulity. “Araj, you are the reason I’m back here! You and your oh-so-precious Melara. You were the reckless one. You were the one who acted without thinking. Everything is your fault!” she screamed, finishing her tirade at the top of her lungs.
Gulping air, she worked to calm herself. A fight wasn’t going to help either of them feel better. Though, if he hadn’t goaded her into yelling at him with his horrible accusations, maybe she wouldn’t be so angry. Her eyes stung with unshed tears as she tried to reconcile that Enzi’s job had been threatened because of her. She felt awful.
“If you really feel like that, then why am I even here?” he asked quietly.
Farzana raked a hand through her curls, yanking on a tangle. “Because you care about me.”
“I guess not, since I’m stupid and don’t use my brain,” he said, his voice low and nasty. His face twisted in disgust as he looked at her, and she shrank under the weight of his withering gaze.
Farzana wiped at her tears with shaking hands. “Araj, please. I’m tired, and I’m angry, but I don’t want to fight.”
He snorted. “Could have fooled me.”
“I’m sorry. I’m—I wasn’t thinking.” A tremor crept into her voice as she worked to deescalate the situation like she had so many times with him in the past.
“Clearly. I just don’t understand why you would go back to the House of Amber and put everyone in danger. It’s irresponsible. That’s all I was saying.”
Farzana bit her tongue before saying, “But I didn’t go back. Ettares and I went for a walk to a park and then came back. We even had an imp guard the whole time.”
He pursed his lips, looking taken aback. “Oh.”
She hung her head, curls falling forward and hiding her face. “I don’t have a good excuse but I am sorry for yelling at you.”
“Sure.”
Farzana looked up at him to see him with his back to her. “Hey, are we good?” she asked. He always accepted her apologies, just like she always accepted his.
“Sure,” he repeated. “We’re fine. I’ll leave you so you can sleep.” Without a backward glance, he left, slamming the door shut behind him.
SHE WALTZED AROUND the room, flitting from Araj’s arms to Enzi’s. Enzi whirled her around, hand in hand, while Araj danced in place, waving his arms in the air. Farzana laughed, delighted with his dance, her cheeks flushed from the rush. She reached out to Araj and grasped his hand. It was wet.
Her hand came away covered in red and she gasped, staring at Araj’s blood-stained hands. Blood flowed freely from a slice in his neck, coating the front of his shirt, his arms, his hands.
He grinned at her, fangs flashing in the light. “Dance with me, Farzana,” he said.
Farzana screamed, pushing him away, but he wrapped his arms around her, pressing his sticky lips to her neck; it burned her flesh like a brand.
She glanced at Enzi, but in his place was Ettares, holding her hand out.
“What’s wrong, my love?” Ettares asked. Farzana stifled another scream as a naked blade sprouted from the center of Ettares's chest, blood seeping into her floor length gown, spurting out and splattering Farzana’s face.
“What is happening?” Farzana sobbed, collapsing to the floor. Her throat began to close; she couldn’t breathe.
The light in the room grew dim, and her vision narrowed to the twin pools of blood that Ettares and Araj danced in. More blood than could possibly fit in their bodies poured out, covering the entire floor, flooding the room. The music slowed until the stillness between the notes stretched into infinity and the light extinguished fully.
Farzana drifted in silence on a sea of blood and darkness.
