Little blue door box set, p.56
Little Blue Door Box Set, page 56
‘You are a wonderful mother to Gaia, and I know you will be to this one, too. I know you want to protect us all, but she–’
‘Don’t say it, Anton. I can’t risk letting someone else into our life. Not right now.’
He didn’t press me on it. Ant knew me well enough to know when to talk and when to stop. Although sometimes he ignored the instinct, he had been put through enough at the hands of one of my sisters. So, instead, his lips lightly found my neck and my jawline, then my lips. Our tongues came together again, perfectly familiar. His hand began to move lower on my abdomen, but I gently pulled away and shook my head.
‘Melodie…’
‘No, Anton. You’re not up to much at all. You still struggle to walk too far, for god’s sake. Plus, your entire family is still awake and chatting downstairs.’
‘You could break every bone in my body, but as long as you don’t break that one, I’m fine.’
‘Anton!’ I couldn’t help myself. I burst into laughter and relief and joy spilled out of me as I nestled into his shoulder. I looked up at him. ‘I don’t think your lips are up to kissing, let alone doing anything else.’
Anton exhaled with a laugh, but pulled me in so close and kissed me so desperately that I couldn’t argue. I wanted him to never let go of me and to press his lips to mine forever.
‘We shall have to find out,’ he said as he carefully pulled away from me.
Lightly our fingers traced over each other’s skin. Occasionally, Anton would wince and I would have to move my weight. We took our time, reading each other’s bodies like Braille, and slipping into the notion of being us again.
He proved how strong he was, over and over. He had carried his broken body over mountains to find me again, and we weren’t going to let go of each other anytime soon. Carefully we gripped each other, as flesh fused together in a sweet electricity, making my spine tingle and my breath escape and catch outside of my chest.
‘Never leave me again,’ I breathed into his ear as he carefully lowered me onto him.
‘Never,’ he answered.
I wanted to bite his lip, but I knew it would be too cruel. Time had become irrelevant in our bubble. I wrapped myself around him like vines along a tree trunk until we coalesced almost completely. Our foreheads rested together, and even our breathing was one. We were unity as we peaked together, our innards deeply stirring together, before we gently released and relaxed as one.
That night, when we did fall asleep, we held onto each other as though our lives truly were depending on it. When I woke in the early hours, we had barely moved and were still perfectly knotted together.
Chapter 26
By the time Anton woke up, I had been watching his chest rise and fall for almost an hour. He rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hand before leaning over and kissing me.
‘I was thinking, really, I should find that cloth you used as an apron and put it on,’ I said, gently pushing his hair off his forehead. He eyed me as he yawned before making a quizzical sound in the back of his throat. ‘You know, when we were first together, and you were looking after me and being my man-slave. I think it would only be fair for me to wear it now.’
His chest vibrated in a low laugh before he shrugged. ‘Sadly, I do not know where it is. Sadly, you’ll just have to be my slave with no clothes.’
‘I’ve missed you so much, Mr Giggler.’
His lips were on mine again and I was tempted to forget how fragile he was and relive the night before, but a little knock on the door stopped us from continuing. It was Gaia’s little knock. She wanted to check on her dad, of course she did. I decided to jump in the shower and get myself ready while they had some time together.
When I came back into the room, they had already made their way downstairs. I picked my phone up from my bedside cabinet and automatically checked my emails. That’s when I noticed my emails from the DNA place. One of them read:
Reminder: You have one unread message
I knew it would be from her. I hadn’t actually been looking at the subject bar of many emails that seemed likely to be generic. I’d just been marking them as read and not really paying any attention. Unsurprisingly, my mind had been elsewhere. I glanced up at the large silver clock on the wall. Just past nine. I wasn’t sure whether to sit down and read the message or just leave it. Intrigue got the better of me. I didn’t have to meet her or let her into my life to read a message from her. When I opened the website, I realised there wasn’t just one message. There were two. The first one in Greek, but Google Translate helped me to work that out, and the second was in English.
The website showed her as a match for being my sister, unsurprisingly. I could assume she saw this and took it upon herself to message me, again, unsurprisingly. And there Liliana was, listed as my mother. Only, hers just said “LP” as her screen name.
According to Google Translate, the first message read much like this:
Hello!
I am your sister. Did you know you have a sister? I was not knowing this. I hoped to find my birth family and I have. I also sent a message to our mother, but she has not contacted me in return. Perhaps she was not looking to find me. Are you? I would love to know you.
Theadora
The second in English:
Melodie,
I am sorry I came to see you without asking. It must have been a shock. I should have waited for you to respond. I now realise that you and our mother were not looking for me. I am sorry to have troubled you.
Theadora
I looked up from my phone, tapping it onto my knee. Guilt wrapped around me like my skin had grown too tight. I had made my decision though, and I knew it would be unfair on everyone else to go back on it, even if I felt like crying for the girl I didn’t know.
I knew what I could do, though. I paused for a moment before doing the inevitable Facebook search of her name, followed by Instagram. I found her on Instagram. Most of her photos were artsy ones, but there was one of her with two people she called her parents and it was unmistakeably her. She stood a good few inches taller than both of them and looked nothing like them. They were short and round, with dark, curly hair. She was tall, slim, with shapely, hourglass hips and white-blonde, wavy hair falling around her shoulders. My sister, Theadora.
Gaia was right. She must have been the baby whom Adam abandoned and who was later adopted. The baby I thought Evangelina was, the baby he said should be named Keres on the note he left with her. His last mean joke on the poor innocent girl was that he had wanted to give her the name of Greek death spirits.
I pressed my phone screen into my leg to stop myself from staring at her. She was my flesh and blood, but so was the baby in my belly. Evangelina was in part my flesh and blood too, and all she wanted to do was use me and control me. I got up, leaving my phone on the bed, and took myself downstairs to be with my family.
Chapter 27
After two weeks, everyone who had come over from England to help had left. All except Akis, who had been staying in my mum’s old place again. He had decided he was going to live on the island and was trying to set up a plan of action. He was the only one of the brothers who could so easily jump ship from England and live on Corfu, and I think they had all decided he should stay, in case Evangelina – or maybe even Theadora – showed up again.
I had an official ultrasound scan booked in for the next morning, and Anton and I planned to tell Gaia at dinner that night. I was lying on our bed staring at the ceiling, watching a small spider make its way across, when Anton appeared out of the en suite.
‘Are you alright there?’ he said, before pulling his top over his head in one motion.
‘Mmm? Yeah.’ My eyes flicked towards him. The expanse of his chest was perfectly toned but with yellowing bruises still fading around his body. He was healing well, all things considered.
‘Do not just mmm me, Melodie mou. You are easier to read than a children’s book. What is wrong?’
‘Well, that’s disappointing.’
He sat down hard on the bed, making it jolt a little. I rolled onto my right side to face him, resting my head in my hand, propped by my elbow.
‘Don’t pull that face. Just talk to me.’
I took a breath before starting, hissing it out of my teeth, considering my words before letting them overflow and pour out of me. ‘What if she doesn’t want a sibling? What if having this baby changes everything? I don’t want us to be divided. What if she turns into a normal stroppy teen about it all and hates me for getting pregnant and having you split your time even more? It was just the two of you for, what…?’ I squeezed my eyebrows together to do the simple maths. ‘Eleven? Twelve years? She might hate the idea of being a sister.’
‘I will go ahead and assume you are talking about Gaia, even though all of your fears do not seem to link to my daughter or what you know about her.’
I flopped back down onto the bed.
‘I know. I think the hormones have taken hold of me and I’m being irrational.’
‘She loves you, Melodie mou.’
‘And I love her. So bloody much. I just want this baby to bring us all together even more.’
‘She is Greek–’
‘Part English,’ I corrected, at which he rolled his eyes.
‘And brought up here in Corfu where we have big families and bigger traditions. We love children and we welcome every one of them. Do you really think Gaia will turn into some different girl when we tell her tomorrow?’
I shook my head. I was back to watching the spider. It looked like it was tripping over nothing as it made a web along the ceiling. Anton’s warm fingers slipped into mine and squeezed.
‘I know you wish she were your daughter. She is your daughter.’
‘I wish she was. Properly, I mean.’
Anton rolled onto the bed to lie with me in silence, watching the spider weave a web.
The scan went well, and we had a few pictures of the baby ready to show Gaia. We were almost at Manthos restaurant – it was the last night it was open before closing for the winter – when Gaia made a suggestion.
‘As we are celebrating Dad being back to his old self, and we are early, can we go to Nafsika for cocktails? I’ve heard they’re really good there.’
We both laughed at her coy tones. ‘Really?’ Anton eyed her in the rear-view mirror.
‘Come on, don’t be so English about it. I’m three quarters Greek and I’m fifteen. I can have a cocktail.’
‘Fine,’ I said. ‘I’ve always liked it there. If we pop in, you can have what I’m having.’ I squeezed Anton’s hand, as I could feel his eyes on my skin.
‘Let me guess, a Sexy Greek?’ She leant her elbow to the car door.
‘Close. I was thinking of having a Virgin Sexy Greek.’
At this Anton exploded with laughter and he gripped his knee as he pulled the car into a parking space.
‘Oh great,’ she said. ‘So, orange juice.’
‘And ice,’ I added.
She paused for a moment, then made her way out of the car. Her neat eyebrows gathered over her thick lashes before she turned to me. ‘If Dad’s driving, why are you drinking juice?’
Anton looked from me to Gaia. He had been healing well and was looking strong and vibrant again, but at that moment, he didn’t want to be the one to say anything and he somehow shrank in size. We were walking along the road and he was hesitating, but Gaia was looking at me.
‘What is wrong with juice?’ Anton said from behind her. ‘You are only fifteen.’
‘Why don’t we go there for a drink after our meal?’ I suggested. ‘I don’t think it’s the best idea to start drinking cocktails on an empty stomach either way.’
Considering my point, she nodded, and the subject was quickly changed.
We crossed the road and soon we were sitting at our table in Manthos Taverna, enjoying the scene. The whitewashed wooden tables had baby-blue place mats and cutlery that reflected the low-hanging sun. The sky was slowly changing with splashes of burnt sienna and gold dancing across the bay. It wasn’t too busy. Perhaps half the tables were taken with people holding hands and staring peacefully out to sea. The smell of fresh bread and delicious dips tickled at my nose moments before they arrived in front of us. We all grabbed chunks of soft white bread, but Anton’s hand stayed buoyant in mid-air, as though it were resting on the waves of the sea, waiting.
As Gaia took her first mouthful, he began, ‘Gaia, we wanted to tell you –’
‘You’re pregnant?’ Her words were muffled through a mouth stuffed with bread and dip. Anton looked both shocked and disgusted, his face shrivelling up. If it had been a normal situation, I think the next words out of his mouth would have been, Do not talk with your mouth full. Instead, she chewed hard and swallowed the bread in her mouth almost whole, with an almost audible and painful gulp. Her eyes were wide and lined with possible tears, although I couldn’t be sure if it was just from the pain of swallowing what looked like half a loaf. I nodded to confirm her suspicion, and a high-pitched squeal rolled out of her. Being so late in the season, there were fewer people to look round in surprise at us, at least. She jumped up from her chair and darted around the table, nearly taking the blue place mat and her cutlery with her. She stood between us, her arms wrapped around our necks before squeezing us into her, pressing our cheeks together in a row. She made it impossible not to smile and laugh. I was possibly the luckiest stepmum on the planet to have such a welcoming and vibrant teen as a stepdaughter. Once we were released from her grip, both laughing, I grabbed at my handbag and carefully pulled out a scan picture from that morning.
‘I knew you wouldn’t celebrate Dad being better with juice.’ She pointed at me and laughed as she took the image and placed herself neatly back in her chair. ‘Look at the tiny foot. Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?’ Another squeal emanated high in her throat.
‘No. We want it to be a surprise,’ I beamed.
As Gaia studied the black-and-white image of the oversized head and tiny foot stretched into the air, Anton placed his hand on mine and gently squeezed it. I couldn’t look at him, though, for fear of crying. I was at a high risk of dehydration from crying after all the emotions he had put me through over the past month, so it seemed like a good idea to keep tears at bay. Instead, I looked out behind Gaia, out to sea. The sun was piercing through a fine stream of white cloud and punctured the sky with dreamy streaks turning to hot pink and lilac. My eyes flicked towards the church on the hill. Suddenly, I had the urge to go up there and light a candle for my grandparents and my mum. A knot twisted inside of me, knowing my baby wouldn’t meet any of my family.
I couldn’t let myself focus on that. Instead, I delighted in Gaia’s beaming face and Anton’s warm hand on mine. We all celebrated with soft drinks. I also celebrated with a gigantic pork chop perfectly moist and definitely designed for two – which I could eat completely guilt-free.
‘They’re ten weeks old,’ I told Gaia when she asked. Then I placed another forkful of buttery pork into my mouth, closing my eyes momentarily to relish it.
‘Hold on, so they’ll be born…’ She trailed off, eyes rolling upwards absentmindedly to count out the months.
‘It’s due at the start of May,’ I said in reply to her calculations, and her eyes snapped back at mine.
‘That is so far away.’ She placed her dainty face in a huff onto her fist that was propped up by her elbow. ‘It’ll be nice when the baby arrives. Having a baby to play with.’
Anton swallowed some of his sea bass before cutting in. ‘It will not be a dolly.’
‘I know that.’ Gaia pouted her full lips at him.
‘Don’t call them it. I hate that.’ I interjected.
‘Fine. They will be fun until you leave us for university.’ Anton lifted a thick eyebrow at her, but she just shrugged.
‘I have been thinking I would be like my father. Go my own way. No need to conform.’
Anton made a low groaning noise deep in his chest. His chin was tilted towards his food as he watched her under his heavy brow.
‘She’s got you there,’ I said. He made the groaning sound again, only this time aimed it at me. I smiled, overly squinting my eyes to convey a little sarcasm before sweetly taking another mouthful of the tender meat and crispy potato.
‘Anyway,’ she began, her eyes narrowing at me. I could feel she was grabbing at straws to change the subject, her brain possibly stored with ideas ready to use when a subject wasn’t to her benefit or liking, and I was the nearest way to divert the conversation from talk of her future. ‘What are you going to do about your sister? Surely you won’t ignore her forever. She might not be like Evangelina.’
My sister, Theadora, the girl who was my blonde equivalent. I chewed my mouthful slowly to bide my time, lifting my napkin to my lips to dab and to cover my mouth, as though suddenly straining over my food. Gaia was deadly still, her fork dangling over her plate, waiting for a response. I’d already told myself the baby wouldn’t know any of my family. Even if they did get to know my sister, would it feel like they were getting to know my family even if one of those family members was someone who was a stranger to me? Was being biologically related to someone enough to make room for them in my life? From recent experience, the answer to that was pretty clear. Family could be made, and shouldn’t always be a birthright.
‘But she could be just like her.’ I put my napkin down for emphasis. ‘It’s not worth the risk, is it? Look what damage that woman caused us all. I’m not putting you or your sibling at risk.’
‘Do you think Dad should be judged because Uncle Marty had an affair once?’ Gaia said, before stuffing a forkful of food into her mouth. Anton, on the other hand, let his knife and fork clang down on his plate.
‘Gaia,’ he snapped.
I was suddenly leaning forward. This was something I had never been party to. Gaia chewed slowly under her bulging, mischievous eyes. Both of us knew Ant wasn’t going to like any gossiping.
