Distrust the hallowed cr.., p.9
Distrust: The Hallowed Crows MC Book 1, page 9
He looks at me in utter disgust, but I don't let it get to me. Not his stare, or the burn of my throat from his ruthless cock. I just calmly rise to my feet and straighten my dress. He must have expected something else because when he eyes my expression, his face falls. I step back, ensuring I'm in sight of the others here, and then I spit his come directly onto his cut, landing it on his President's patch.
The already silent room becomes somewhat tranquil. I can feel the power he just gave me, the same power he just took from Carter without even knowing it. Goosebumps dance along my skin as I throw away my manners and abandon my silence just this once, in favor of my dormant tongue.
"You think just because you can force me to my knees that it will make me a whore?” I laugh humorlessly, “You're pathetic. A stupid little boy, desperate to fill the big shoes my father left behind.” I shake my head, licking what remains of his come from my red lips, letting him track the movement before I add, “I don't retaliate to children, so bring your worst Aiden, I already know how a real man plays and wins.”
I land the only blow I know will cut him, casting a look of disappointment and disgust in Killian and Ezra’s direction. Then I spin on my heels and head back the way I came, unwilling to stay under their roof for one minute more. I need to get out of here, just for tonight. Rebuild what that just cost me, and put my fucking walls back in place. I just dropped to my fucking knees for him. No, I was forced to my knees without another choice. He fucked my mouth while seven of his brothers watched and did it without an ounce of regret. The sting of his actions is somehow better, and worse, than any of Carter's games.
I make it outside before I let myself feel the effects of what just happened. My breaths coming in short angry pants, as I try to calm my racing heart. I’m disgusted and filled with desire at the same time. Ready to burn their fucking clubhouse to the ground, but also come around his monster cock as the other two watch. The wide scope of feelings makes it hard to focus as my fingers frantically rub at my chest.
"What did those dumb fuckers do this time?" That familiar voice cuts through the night, wrapping around me like a security blanket.
He doesn't even get to take a step before I am slamming my body against his, crushing my arms around his neck. "Angel." I sob his name like a cry for help. Just so thirsty for someone that doesn't despise me.
"Missed you too, Becca." His arms curl around my back, bigger and firmer than what I remember, as he sweeps me off my feet into his signature bear hug, before dropping me back down.
I stare up into his perfect loving eyes, and comforting smile, and the events of the night just melt away. Angel Burrows in all his glory. My best friend, my first friend, my family, is finally home.
He steps back, his eyes zoning in on me, dissecting every thought and feeling without me having to say a word, before he exhales deeply. “Let’s go for a ride.” I know he can see the mascara smudges no doubt on my cheek, and the smeared lipstick across my mouth, but he chooses to let it slide.
I move before I have even finished nodding, and let him drag me over to his bike. I don’t think about the fact that the only bike I have ever ridden on the back of is my father’s. Dreams of riding wrapped around my three Crows, long forgotten. Angel climbs back on his, not caring about the long journey he has just finished, and my fingers hike up my dress again, so I can swing onto the bike behind him. He hands me a helmet, and the last thing I see before I slam the visor shut and ride off into the darkness is Ezra’s regret-filled eyes staring after us.
Too little, too late, Easy E.
She barely spares me a glance before she rides off into the dusk with her knight in shining armor. Angel Burrows, the one thing we could never control. The one guy who passed her father’s imaginary tests, and never backed down from our warnings. Charming everyone until he wormed his way to her side. Her best friend, her shoulder to cry on, her savior.
Under normal circumstances I would hate the fact he has come home. In fact, when Aiden told us he was coming back to finally take his patch, I was furious. Even more so when we found out that Connor himself had called him, told him that Rebecca needed him, and what did he do? He finished up classes, dropped everything, and practically ran home.
His arrival is something I have been dreading. Until tonight. He went too far. Aiden went too far. He crossed a line that he will never be able to uncross, and now we will all have to pay the price. Ignore her, keep her at a distance, we can’t trust her, those were his words. So what the fuck did he just do? This wasn’t like us enjoying her together, he fucked her mouth in front of five prospects. Demeaning her in all their eyes. It’s gonna take everything in me to not fucking kill them for what they just witnessed.
The jealousy pours over me like a gasoline I can’t escape. My own cock thick and hard beneath my jeans as I recall the tears dripping down her face, her lipstick coating Aiden’s dick, the choking sounds she made as she took him so far down her throat. I have never in my life seen something so erotic, so perfect. The image of her mixes with the one engraved within me from the night I watched Killian fuck her throat. We certainly aren’t the same four people who were together that night.
How did we get here? We were all solid, a unit that had each other's back no matter what. Until her betrayal. Then that solidarity continued between Aiden, Killian, and I. We knew the truth about Rebecca, and when she returned we all agreed to stay away from her. To not let her talented tongue of tales fool us again. Yet Aiden just fucked her mouth and the other night Killian ate her out in the garage. And me? The one person who always supported her and made sure she was okay, just let it happen. I mean the only words I have spoken to her since she has been home have been in the last couple of days and none of them were kind.
Clearly Rebecca isn’t the only one who isn’t acting like herself, none of us are. Hell, I’ve seen Aiden fuck countless club whores, but not once has he ever degraded anyone they way he just did with Bex. Sure he’d take advantage of them, fuck them publicly and without regret, but this was different, this was her. He took something that wasn't freely given to him. Something that none of us have ever done before, and would never be okay with under any normal circumstance. It not only goes against any moral code we could ever claim to have, but it sets a bad precedent within the club. It says that not only can Rebecca be disrespected, but that all women can.
Then there are things with Killian. My silent savior. The one person who never usually lies to me, and can always talk to me about anything. Yet earlier I found out from Aiden and not him, that he’d had a run in with Rebecca. Something in the past he’d have rushed to tell me. Yet since she returned he’s been more closed off than ever before. I’m not mad about it, but I am concerned. Should I be mad? I mean we still, after all this time together haven’t ever made anything official, but is what he did wrong?
We’ve fucked plenty of other girls since Rebecca, although none since she has returned home, neither of us digging deep into the reasons why. But this feels different. No, it is different, because it isn’t just any girl, it’s her. The one we were always meant to have together. His admission of what he did with her cut through me like a knife if I’m being honest with myself. But was that a knife of infidelity or jealousy? Or both? And who would I be jealous of more?
I stare at the empty gates Rebecca just escaped through before I turn around, storming back inside. The prospects are all doing push ups, and I frown until I see Mitch overseeing them, focused on his task. Initiation Night.
“Hustler,” I shout across the room, louder than I meant, but the anger is curling inside of me.
He looks up and without a word just nods towards church, knowing what I am looking for. I don’t waste another second in his presence, I know he can handle the prospects for now, he’s only been with us a couple of years, but he has become a vital member of the club.
The door bangs open and I find Aiden and Killian in a silent stare off, both of them looking my way as I enter. I stalk towards them and without another thought in my head, except his cock down her throat, I punch Aiden right in the jaw. There is enough force behind it that he stumbles back into the table.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” I seethe, going for him again as Killian holds me back. “Where do you get off, doing shit like that to her?”
Aiden’s thumb catches the blood dripping from his mouth. “I didn’t see you trying to stop me?” Is all he responds. I want to hit him again. Hit him and not stop until he comes to his fucking senses. Senses that have disappeared in the last two years. The last two months.
“Stop you?” I laugh without humor. “Is anyone or anything capable of fucking stopping you anymore?”
“We all agreed she should fall in line.” He shrugs his shoulders as he collapses into the chair at the head of the table, leaning back to look at me. “Besides you didn’t have the same reservations when Killian shoved his cock down her throat, or do you only oppose when it’s a cock you don’t want to suck yourself?”
“That was different and you know it.” I point my finger at him, as Killian continues to keep me in place with a firm hand to my chest. “Or did you lose the matter of asking for consent the same time you lost your fucking mind!” I shout.
“She didn’t say no.” He shrugs again, and I want to take the gavel from the table and smash in right into his face.
“Yeah well she didn’t say yes either you prick. Is this the kind of President you want to be? The kind who forces the girl he loved to her knees in front of half of his brothers?”
“I never loved her” He snaps quickly.
It’s bullshit, we both know it, but I don’t call him on it. “Yeah, well she loved you.”
“You’re the one who has lost their mind if you still believe that shit.” He looks murderous at even having to defend his own actions. Actions the old Aiden wouldn’t have dared commit.
“She was our friend before anything else.” I try desperately to get him to see past all the mountains of shit we are under, and just remember the simplicity of that. But it doesn’t work.
“Yeah, then she became his whore.” His tone is dismissive, and I know there isn’t anything I can say or do that will change his mind.
Killian knows it too. “That’s enough!” He snaps, pushing me back and turning his sharp eye on Aiden. “You went too far and you know it.”
“Of course you side with her.” Aiden snarls, lighting up a smoke and inhaling deeply. “Am I the only one who remembered what she actually did to us?”
“I’m not siding with her, I’m siding with him.” Killian snaps, pointing to me. “With women.” He adds, “Do you want to be the kind of President that runs a club where its members force women to do whatever the fuck they want? Are you that sick of the whores, that you just think it’s okay to take from whoever you deem fit enough to force to their knees?”
“She isn’t just anyone, we are talking about Rebecca here.” Aiden grumbles, snatching a bottle from the drinks cart beside him and spinning off the lid.
“Exactly!” Killian booms. “That’s my point. You didn’t do that to some random chick or a club groupie, you did this to Rebecca.”
“I know.” Aiden slams the bottle to the table, “I fucking know.”
Killian observes his outburst without reaction before replying cooly, “And if one of the prospects wants to do the same to her, one of our brothers?” He asks.
Aiden is out of his chair and smashing the bottle of whiskey against the wall before I even see him move. “Anyone touches her and I’ll slit their fucking throat.” His threat is utterly deadly.
“And yet you just violated her in a room filled with your newly appointed disciples.” Killian claps back loudly, before shaking his head. “I bet Connor is rolling in his freshly soiled grave.” He spits at him in disgust.
“I suppose we aren’t talking about what you did with her, or am I the only one on trial tonight?” Aiden looks at him the way he usually looks at his enemies, and I can’t help but take a subtle step closer to Killian. But of course Aiden catches it. He laughs, manically, before slumping back into his chair. “Let me worry about my own sins, Killer. You’ve got enough of your own problems to deal with.” He looks at me pointedly, before grabbing another bottle from the cart beside him.
Kill just shakes his head and directs his voice at me. “We’ve got work to do, let’s go.” He storms off towards the door, and back towards Initiation Night. I spare one more glare at Aiden before my feet follow after Killian.
Aiden doesn’t leave church the rest of the night, and Killian and I finish up initiation with Hustler. None of them speak a word of what we all witnessed, and when the light finally starts to peek back into the windows of the clubhouse, I tell all the guys to disappear.
Once they are all out of sight, Kill looks at me. “Meet you in bed?” He asks quietly, knowing I won't move, can’t move, until I see she is okay. I just nod, not even capable of words at this point.
I feel his presence disappear at the same time I hear the clubhouse door open, and stumbling steps come inside. They round the corner and I wish the sight could make me smile. Rebecca smiling, hair all messed up, that perfect cream dress now covered in creases from riding on the back of Angel’s bike.
“That’s what I said.” She laughs, eyes bright like the sun as Angel supports her by the arm.
Neither of them notice me until I speak. “Bex, can I have a minute?” Their heads snap towards me.
I expect anger, hostility, down right rage, but she smiles wider. “E!” She screeches, exactly the way she always used to, the sound of it mixed with her little laugh rolling over me. “Look who I found!” She adds, gesturing to Angel dramatically, before saying, “Oh my god, let’s go egg nosey old man’s house like we used to.” Her excitement bursting out of her.
I frown, looking at Angel who is glaring at me. “She’s drunk?” I ask even though it’s pretty obvious.
“As a skunk.” He confirms, “She needed something to take her mind off things.” The accusation in his tone isn’t lost on me.
“She’s not twenty one,” I remind him.
He smirks. “Her age never seemed to bother you before.” His scolding comes as a surprise, but it shouldn’t. I’m sure Rebecca told him everything that occurred between us, he’s her best friend. Hell, he probably knows more than we do.
“You’re late,” a harsh voice snaps from behind me, as Aiden stalks into the room.
“You’re late,” Rebecca mimics in a ridiculous imitation of him that makes herself laugh wildly.
“She’s drunk.” He sighs, looking tired, and I find myself wondering when the last time he really slept was. He is always here doing something. “E, put her in bed. Angel, follow me.” He doesn’t wait to see if we listen, already knowing that we will.
Angel drops a kiss to her head. “Sleep tight, Becca. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
She smiles up at him, then leans up and kisses his cheek hard. “It’s so good to have you home, Angel.”
He cuts another hard glance my way. “Yeah, I think I stayed away too long.” I fucking hate the accusation in his tone. I hate that I deserve it even more.
“Run along, prospect,” I bite out, and he shakes his head with a laugh.
Rebecca moves as Angel walks away, only to stumble over her own feet. I dart out to catch her before she can fully fall.
“Come on, let’s get you to bed.” I scoop her up into my arms, and her scent wraps around me. A part of me settles, like it knows I am holding a vital missing piece of myself that hasn’t been close enough in twenty four fucking months.
She rests her head on my shoulder and lets me carry her through the clubhouse until we reach her room. I go inside and drop her to her feet at the end of the bed. I expect her to just drop down onto it and be out like a light. But as soon as her feet touch the ground, she grips the hem of her dress and pulls it over her head. Revealing her perfect ivory skin, and a red underwear set that would make a fucking saint want to sin.
She crawls on all fours onto the bed until she can drop down against her pillow, not bothering with the quilt. When she doesn’t say anything, I take one last look and turn to leave, when her voice reaches out.
“I really loved you, you know.” She sighs sleepily. “I wish you didn’t leave me.” Those words are like a fucking dagger to my heart as she falls into a deep snore.
I should walk away, I’ve done it before, I should do it again. Save us all the heartache, but somehow, I don’t think I could ever will myself to ever walk away from her again, no matter what the cost.
My head feels heavy, like someone poured cement over it, and fuck why is the room spinning? I try to turn to my side to stop the sickening feeling churning inside of me, but it just makes my stomach roll all the more. What the hell is wrong with me? Just as I have that thought, flashbacks of last night assault my mind.
Dinner, the dress, Aiden, his cock, the prospects, Angel, his bike, and drinking. Fuck, so much drinking. So this must be a hangover. I’ve never had one before, never been allowed to be intoxicated enough to be hungover. Fuck, I think I might be grateful to him for once.
I try to swallow, but the dryness in my throat burns. Fuck, I need some water, some pain killers, some fucking anything that will make this awful feeling disappear. I attempt to move again and groan as the pain wracks my skull once more.
“Hungover?” A soft voice interrupts my turmoil, and I startle looking round the room until I land on a dark figure I recognize sitting in the chair in the corner.
“Ezra?” I squint into the darkness that is still lingering around the room.
He sighs, “Yeah, Bex, it’s me.” He stands, slowly walking over to the bed, until he reaches the end, nodding towards it. I realize he is asking for permission to sit down. I nod tentatively, and he drops down onto the end of the bed.
