Mad world, p.31
Mad World, page 31
I was carrying nearly fifteen hundred dollars worth of new items. “I think I’m good.”
Her mouth turned down. “Are you sure you have to be back at school? Can’t we skip the game?”
“I wish,” I said dryly. “At least you can sit with your roommate. I have to sit next to—what did you call them?”
“Satan’s sycophants,” she reminded me seriously.
I snapped my fingers. “That’s it.”
“Yeah, you win. But tell my new bestie Kayleigh that I said hi,” she told me with a healthy dose of sarcasm.
I narrowed my eyes playfully at her. “Maybe I’ll suggest you join the squad.”
Bex looked legitimately horrified. “God, no.”
I tipped my head back and laughed. It felt good; the sun was warm on my face and laughter bubbled from my chest as I walked with an actual friend.
“Hey, Maddie! Bex! Wait up!” a voice called out.
We paused on the sidewalk and turned to see Linc and Court striding toward us.
“What are you two doing here?” I asked as they approached.
Linc grinned, his eyes lighting up. “Looking for a couple of hot honeys.”
Court groaned. “Seriously, dude?”
Linc ignored him and waggled his eyebrows at us. “So? Whatcha say, ladies?”
“I’ll ask my fiancé,” I smirked.
Linc made a face. “Yeah, don’t tell him I was doing anything remotely close to hitting on you. Whatever happened last night has him all raged out.”
My eyes widened.
“Wait, what happened last night?” Bex demanded. “Did something happen at dinner?”
Sighing, I gave them all the abbreviated version of events.
“That guy’s lucky Ryan didn’t fucking kill him,” Court muttered, scrubbing a hand across his scruffy jaw. The dark shadow gave him an almost dangerous look, but it was the quiet fury coming off Linc in waves that worried me.
“Nothing happened,” I told Linc quietly.
His stormy eyes met mine. “It’s fucking bullshit, Mads.”
“I agree,” Bex chimed in. “I vote we fuck up uncle fuck-face.”
That broke through Linc’s mood. He smiled at Bex. “How did I miss the little firecracker you turned into?”
“Probably because you’ve been too busy screwing whatever girl is throwing herself at you since you realized what an erection was to actually notice that women have more to offer than a few convenient holes to stick your dick in,” Bex deadpanned.
Linc blinked once, thunderstruck. “Marry me.”
Court rolled his eyes, shouldering past his friend and nudging us to start walking again. “Ignore this idiot.”
“I usually do,” Bex said smugly, but I noticed she blushed a little as she smiled at Court and fell into step beside him.
“Ryan and Maddie are getting married. We can make it double,” Linc suggested as he caught up.
I couldn’t help but glance down at the ring on my left hand. Every morning I put it on my finger, it felt like the lines of why were getting more and more blurred.
“Don’t,” Linc said in a low voice. He grabbed my elbow gently and pulled me to a stop as Bex and Court walked on. “Look, obviously I don’t know everything that’s going on, but whatever is happening with you and Ry? Just... let it happen.”
Unsure, I shifted my weight on my feet. “It’s hard, Linc.”
It was a testament to how much Linc loved Ryan that he didn’t jump on that opening.
“I’m serious, Maddie. I’ve seen him with girls, but not like this. It totally unhinged him last night, what happened with your uncle.”
“That’s because he’s a good guy,” I argued weakly.
“He isn’t,” Linc said flatly. “Ryan Cain is one of my best friends, but he’s also selfish as fuck and can be as ruthless as they come. But he’s different with you. He’s different about you.”
“It’s only been a couple of weeks,” I pointed out. “And yeah, things are going good now, but I don’t belong in this world, Linc. We both know this will never go anywhere.”
“Says who?” he challenged me. “Fuck what other people say. What matters is what you and Ryan feel. And if you ask me? You both deserve a win. You both got dealt shitty hands.”
My eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”
He exhaled hard. “That’s Ry’s story to tell when he’s ready.”
I twisted the engagement ring on my finger. “But it feels like everything is moving so fast.”
“So what if it is?” He shrugged. “There are people who are together for years before they get married, and they divorce within a year. Other people get married after a month and are together forever. Fuck what society says. Life’s too short not to follow your heart.”
“Maybe you’re right,” I allowed softly.
He snorted and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, guiding me down the sidewalk. “Of course I am.”
I smacked his stomach, almost wincing when my hand landed on solid muscle.
“Do you guys just work out all day?” I groused.
“Obviously,” he replied. “How else am I going to land my dream girl? We can’t all have a ready-made fiancée or our own fucked-up version of Sleeping Beauty with the girl-next-door.”
“What?” I laughed.
He inclined his head to where Court and Bex had paused in front of her car ahead of us. “I think Court’s crushing on her. Has been since the night he took her back to her dorm when Dean drugged her.”
“I think it might be mutual,” I stage-whispered, watching as Bex giggled and ducked her head at something he said.
An odd look passed his face. “They lost a lot of time.”
I tilted my head curiously at him.
Flashing me a quick, but obviously forced, smile, Link shrugged. “Their families used to be close. Court… He and Bex were close.”
“Yeah, she made it sound like he was kind of like a big brother or something,” I said.
He snorted. “I can assure you that the last thing Court thought about Bex was as a sibling.”
Surprised, I glanced ahead at them and watched to see Court brush a lock of Bex’s hair from her eyes.
“Ah, young love,” Linc sighed dramatically.
“And what about you?” I asked, teasing. “Don’t you want love?”
All playfulness left his expression. It turned dark and brooding. Almost haunted. “Sometimes,” he finally answered.
“Sometimes?” I repeated doubtfully.
“Yeah. Sometimes it would be nice to have someone who I could share everything with. Someone who wouldn’t freak out at all the broken, twisted up parts of me. But I also realize that would be kind of shitty of me, you know? To expect someone to walk in the dark with me.”
I grasped his wrist, stunned. “Linc.”
“We should catch up.” He gave me a tight smile and dropped his arm from my shoulders. He walked ahead of me, leaving me to wonder what darkness he was carrying around.
Chapter 42
“Sit still before I burn you,” Bex ordered, brandishing the flat iron dangerously close to my forehead.
I froze out of self-preservation from where I had been fidgeting as she painstakingly straightened every single strand of hair on my head.
“I’m hot,” I whined, knowing I sounded like an annoying little kid, but honestly? After the game (which Ryan crushed, leading the team to a massive 43-10 victory), I’d come back to my room to shower and get ready for the beach house party. Between the hot shower and Bex blow drying my hair and now flat ironing it, I was burning up.
And okay, maybe I was also a little excited to see Ryan.
“You’re not hot yet,” Bex snarked back, running the iron over the same section of hair. “But you will be when I’m done.”
Huffing, I sat back and let her finish. As soon as she was done, I quickly applied some makeup and pulled my dress on, then finished the look with the heels Bex had bought me for my birthday.
“You look stunning,” she gushed.
I grinned at her, taking in the way she’d loosely curled her dark hair and showed off the multicolored streaks in it, and she had smoked out her hazel eyes. In a merlot-colored dress and sky-high heels, she looked ready for a party herself.
“Back at ya, babe,” I said with a wink as someone knocked.
Butterflies erupted in my stomach.
Bex rolled her eyes and went for the door. “Chill, girl. It’s a party, not your wedding.”
That really didn’t help settle my nerves.
She pulled the door open and sighed dramatically at me. “Maddie, it’s for you.”
“Hey,” Ryan greeted as he came in the door in jeans and a black t-shirt that did amazing things for his chest and abs. “Happy birthday, Mads.”
I pointed at him and glared at Bex. “Why does he get to wear jeans? You told me no jeans tonight.”
“Because you’re a girl,” Bex replied with an indifferent shrug as she grabbed her purse. “It’s our job to look pretty while being as uncomfortable as fuck.”
“I want a new job,” I announced.
“I think you look hot,” Ryan told me, his eyes heating as they swept over me.
Okay, maybe this whole dressing up thing didn’t suck as much when I got that kind of reaction.
I bit my lower lip. “Thanks.”
“The guys are downstairs with the car. Are you two ready?” Ryan’s gaze flicked to Bex before settling back on me.
Nodding, I grabbed my bag and let Ryan lead us down to Linc’s massive SUV. Ash was in the front passenger seat while Court waited in one of the middle row seats.
Ryan linked his fingers with mine. “We’ll take the back,” he announced, getting in first before letting me climb in back with him. I sat down and started to buckle my seatbelt when Ryan slid me toward him on the leather bench so I was in the middle.
Bex closed the door and flashed Court a smile ahead of me.
I glanced up at Ryan.
“You were too far away,” he said softly, his blue eyes searching mine as he tucked me against his hard body.
I melted a little at that as Linc drove the car away from our dorm and toward the main road off campus.
Ryan’s fingertips grazed the bare skin of my leg almost curiously. I shivered in response as he grinned.
“You two behave back there,” Linc called, looking at us in the rearview mirror.
“Watch the fucking road,” Ryan replied with a smirk, flipping him off.
Ash turned around from the front, his green eyes narrowed in amusement. “I’ll keep an eye on them.”
“You’re both hilarious,” Ryan deadpanned as I stifled a giggle.
He looked down at me. “Don’t encourage them.”
I shrugged helplessly. “Sorry?”
Bex turned in her seat so her back was to the door. “You guys played great tonight.”
“We always play great,” Linc informed her from the front.
I snorted. “Not always.”
“You dare question our worth, woman?” Linc demanded indignantly.
“I question that pass you nearly fumbled in the third quarter,” I said dryly.
“Damn,” Court hooted, turning around to high-five me.
“I didn’t fumble a pass,” Linc argued.
“She said almost,” Ash pointed out. “And she’s right. You did.”
“I got hit by three guys!”
“You should’ve zagged left. You had an open lane,” I countered flippantly as Ryan started to laugh.
“Maybe if I had someone decent throwing the ball,” Linc said pointedly, looking at the guy next to me.
Ryan bristled. “Don’t even. That pass was perfect.”
“Well...” I hedged.
“Excuse me?” Ryan looked at me, his brows lowered.
“See? Tell him, Maddie!” Linc yelled.
I peered up at Ryan. “I’m just saying, you wobbled the pass a little.”
His head snapped back in shock. “There was no wobble. I don’t wobble.”
“There was a little wobble,” Court added, smirking back at his friend. Clearly they loved riling him up.
I patted his chest patronizingly. “Maybe you should practice more.”
He snagged my hand, his eyes piercing me “Oh, it’s not practice I need.”
My blood heated at the intensity in his gaze. I swallowed uneasily and watched his lips curve into a knowing smirk as he realized how I was affected by his implication.
“There’s a blanket in the back,” Linc sighed, shaking his head. “If you two are going to fuck each other, use that on the seats.”
I ducked my head as I felt my cheeks flush.
“Ass,” Court muttered, kicking Linc’s seat.
“What?” he cried. “It’s Maddie’s birthday. Let her have a birthday orgasm.”
“You really have zero filter,” Bex huffed. “Stop embarrassing her.”
“Can’t. Won’t,” he clarified. “After years of being subjected to Madelaine the Ice Princess, it’s nice having a girl who actually reacts to shit around here with a smile.”
The mention of my sister was like having ice water dumped over my head.
Between shopping with Bex, the game, and having fun, I had sort of pushed away the fact that today should have been Madelaine’s eighteenth birthday, too.
We could have celebrated together.
Instead, I was living her life, and now she was just gone.
“Fucking idiot,” Ryan muttered. He gently turned my face to his with one hand. “Ignore him, okay?”
“I didn’t even think about her,” I confessed.
“Because you’re living your own life,” he said gently, thumbing my bottom lip. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“I’m living her life,” I countered. I held my hand up. “This is her ring. You’re her fiancé. It’s her squad. That car Gary gave me? It should have been Madelaine’s.”
He looked ready to argue with me.
“I’m not hers,” Bex cut in innocently. “I’m here for you.”
“Same,” Court agreed, and Linc nodded.
Ash turned to look at me. “We all hated Madelaine. The reason we’re not all driving separately is because we like hanging out with you, Madison.”
“And people like you,” Bex added with a small smile. “People were always afraid of her. She was mean. You know that.”
“I do,” I admitted. “But she was still my sister. My twin. And she’s dead. This was the first time we could have celebrated together.”
“No,” Bex argued, shaking her head, “that’s a lie. I told you—Madelaine knew you existed years ago.”
“Wait—what?” Court turned to me.
“Yeah,” Bex went on. “When we were still friends, Madelaine told me she had found another birth certificate with hers. She knew she had a twin for years. She didn’t reach out until Madison contacted her.”
A sour feeling curdled in my stomach. Bex had told me that, but I hadn’t really unpacked that truth. With Madelaine dead, it seemed kind of pointless. I couldn’t ask her why.
“When did she find out?” Court demanded.
Bex frowned. “We were almost thirteen? She wrote me off a few weeks later, and we never talked about it again.”
“And it was her idea for you to switch places, right?” Ryan added quietly.
I nodded.
He exchanged a look with Ash.
“Are you two keeping secrets again?” Linc sighed. “Ash and Ryan frequently forget it’s supposed to be the four of us.”
“You didn’t play the tape for them?” I asked. I had assumed that when Ryan admitted to bugging my room that he had shared everything he’d overheard with his friends. Apparently only Ash knew that my sister had known about me.
“It didn’t seem important,” Ryan admitted. “I told them who you were. The fact that Madelaine knew about you years ago could have meant a lot of things.”
“Like?” I asked, almost afraid of the answer.
He exhaled, his cheeks puffing out. “She was selfish, Maddie. Maybe she didn’t want to share the spotlight? Maybe she thought you would be competition.”
“Which you totally would have been,” Linc supplied.
“Not helping,” Bex growled at him when my face fell a little.
I didn’t want to be her competition. I wanted to be her sister. I wanted to not be alone.
Ryan touched my hand. “We’ll probably never know, and I’m sorry for that.”
“You are?”
“Don’t act surprised,” he murmured with another one of those smiles that made my knees turn to Jell-O. “In case you haven’t noticed, I kind of like you, Madison Porter.”
“It’s been a long time since I heard my full name,” I whispered. I gave him a small smile as his thumb smoothed over the back of my hand.
Ash cleared his throat. “And it really isn’t important anyway, Maddie. You’re here now. Whatever your sister’s reasons were don’t matter.”
I frowned and looked at Bex before glancing up at Ash. “Actually? I could use a little help.”
“Name it,” he said, his green eyes sincere.
“Gary cloned my sister’s phone so I would have access to her stuff. I guess to make the transition a little smoother? Anyway, there’s this encrypted file I can’t get into.”
“It’s a CryptDuo,” Bex added.
Ash’s brow furrowed. “How the fuck did she get a CryptDuo app on her phone?”
“What’s CryptDuo?” Linc asked with a frown.
“A super secure app that encrypts whatever files you want it to,” Ash replied, looking a little concerned.
I shrugged and pulled it from my purse. I handed it to Bex, who passed it to Ash.
“What’s your password?” he asked.
“My birthday,” I replied.
Every head swung in my direction. My shoulders hunched. “What?”
“Your birthday?” Ryan shook his head. “Maddie, that’s one of the easiest passwords to guess.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Well, we can’t all have special numbers tattooed on our arms. Besides, I needed something easy to remember.”
Sighing, Ash shook his head at me. “I don’t know if I can access all the data on this, but I can try. I might need your phone for a few days.”
