Beautifully damaged boxs.., p.65
Beautifully Damaged Boxset, page 65
“Can I touch you?”
He didn’t need to ask. I moved his hand beneath the T-shirt and my pajama tank. He gently cupped my breast. “I need you.” I arched into him. “Please.”
Holden released me, then scooped me into his powerful arms and carried me to the bedroom. He placed me on the bed, then closed and locked the door. His erection tented his basketball shorts.
“I don’t want to trigger you, babe. Tell me to stop anytime.”
I sat up and tugged off his shirt, then my tank. The cool air brushed across my nipples. I shed my shorts and thong, tossing them on the floor.
His gaze raked up and down my body, love and lust evident in his expression.
“Take off your clothes,” I said, parting my legs for him. I’d be damned if Holden thought he was losing me, and the fastest way to prove it was to show him how much I wanted him. Needed him.
Holden stepped out of his shorts and boxer briefs, his thick cock pressing against his stomach. As he pulled his shirt over his head, I moaned at his perfection. A dark smattering of hair covered his chest and trailed down his abs. He wrapped his long fingers around his shaft, a bead of precum leaking from the tip. My tongue darted across my lip.
Holden crawled onto the bed next to me. He rolled to his side and propped up on his elbow. “You’re so beautiful.”
I touched his jaw, his skin warm and smooth beneath my fingertips. “You don’t have to ask, just touch me. I’m all yours.” Mentally, I promised to focus on him in hopes it would stop any flashbacks.
“Okay, but if—”
I placed my fingers against his mouth. “Stop talking.” I leaned up and kissed him, then directed his hand between my thighs. A gasp escaped me as he gently spread me apart. His thumb grazed my clit, massaging it in slow circles.
“Get comfortable, babe, and let me take care of you.”
I sank into the pillows, then Holden took my nipple between his teeth. I fisted his dark hair and my back arched off the bed.
Barrett’s ugly mug flickered in and out of my vision, and I mentally punched him in the nose. That bastard wouldn’t come between Holden and me. Focusing on Holden, I attempted to relax as he eased a finger inside me. I froze as flashes of Barrett’s assault rippled through me.
He gently kissed me, then peered deep into my eyes, his expression determined and sincere. “We’re moving too fast, babe.” He removed his hand from my core, and I clenched my teeth.
“Don’t stop. I need to push through this. Please.” I gripped his arm, my plea sounding desperate, needy. I was. I wanted Holden to wash away the memories that haunted me.
“I can’t rush you. I love you. If you fell apart because we were together too soon after everything you’ve gone through, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. We can take our time. You’re more important to me than the sex.”
“I don’t deserve you,” I whispered, struggling to breathe above the panic running rampant inside me. If Holden knew that Barret had made me come, he wouldn’t want me anymore. I’d betrayed him. I’d betrayed myself. He would never forgive me. Intense pressure settled on my chest, and I swallowed painfully over the anguished lump in my throat.
“Whatever happened, River, you don’t ever have to talk about it. We’ll be okay. I promise.”
I curled into a ball and hid my face. Agony ripped through me, threatening to shatter me beyond repair. Holden held me as I shook. Dan, my asshole guardian, had been child’s play compared to Barrett and the compound. I’d used my anger to protect me, shield me from losing my mind. I’d built steel walls around my heart, but Holden held the key to breaking through them. If the floodgates opened, I wasn’t sure I could survive the pain.
***
Once Holden booked the penthouse and our flight to Portland for that evening, we made sandwiches for lunch. Jace and Reid returned shortly after, carrying bags from Nordstrom and Target. I couldn’t help but smile at the contrast between the stores.
Jace had also picked up a few things for me, which was super sweet. Holden must have called the doctor because there was a Walgreens bag with my new birth control pills. Excusing myself, I hightailed it out of the kitchen and into the master bathroom. As soon as I was behind closed doors, I popped the first pill immediately. I loved Holden, but another pregnancy couldn’t be on the table at the moment. Within minutes, I’d brushed my teeth, applied deodorant, and brushed my hair. Jace had also chosen a package of thongs, a few T-shirts, polo shirts, three pairs of designer jeans, socks, and a new pair of Nikes. Brynn had shopping competition. He was amazing.
Feeling human, I waltzed out of the bedroom with purpose. Holden released a low whistle, making me giggle. The soft turquoise top and light wash skinny jeans fit perfectly. Reid had changed clothes as well, now sporting a navy polo shirt and jean shorts. I swallowed hard. He would never know how much it startled me when I looked at him. It was like Holden was standing in front of a mirror.
Jace and Reid turned, and Jace’s face lit up. “Damn, I’m good.” He attempted to high-five Reid, but Reid stared at him with a blank expression, confused about what he was supposed to do.
“It’s all good, man. Just leave me hanging like that.” Jace folded his arms across his chest, feigning hurt feelings.
Our laughter filled the air, then I explained to Reid how a high five worked. If I pretended hard enough, I could imagine that he was an exchange student who didn’t know much about our culture. It was easier to teach him and not sink into a dark mood. After years of being a sex slave, Reid might be a master in the bedroom, but he was naïve about how the rest of the world worked.
“Oh, one more thing.” Jace slid an iPhone box to me. “Brand new and all yours.”
I clutched it to my chest. “Thank you for picking it up for me.”
“I got one, too.” Reid held his cell, frowning at it. “I’ve seen these, but I have no idea what to do with it.”
“I’ll help set both of them up,” Holden offered.
“Thanks, babe.” I pushed up on my tiptoes and kissed him.
I snuggled up to Holden, finding comfort in the warmth of his body. Peeking up at him, I gave him a soft smile as my heart pitter-pattered against my chest. I loved Holden more than anything or anyone. Even though I was disappointed that he’d stopped in the bedroom, the images of Barrett had hammered my brain almost immediately. I probably would have full-on freaked out if we’d continued. Normally, my style was to push through the problem, but my decisions also affected Holden, and I couldn’t put him through that. It wasn’t fair to him.
Once Jace and Reid grabbed a bite to eat, we piled into Zayne’s Mercedes and headed downtown for the DNA test. It was over in a few minutes, and I was grateful that Holden paid a rush fee for the results. Hopefully, we would know if Holden and Reid were brothers in a few hours.
Jace climbed into the front passenger seat, and Reid, Holden, and I sat in the back. I sat between the guys and nudged Reid in the side with my elbow. He gave me a lopsided grin in return. Sometimes I startled a little when I looked at him, the similarities between him and Holden were eerie. If Holden didn’t have a few inches on Reid in height, I was pretty sure I would get them confused more than I already did. I couldn’t wait to see Brynn’s reaction. I could almost hear her now. “Oh, double the trouble. I’ll take the middle please. Twice the pleasure.” I snickered out loud.
“What are you laughing about?” Holden asked, curiosity flickering in his eyes.
“I was wondering what Brynn will say when she sees you and Reid.” I arched a brow, implying something steamy.
Holden chuckled. “Guess we’ll find out soon.” He kissed my cheek, then shot a quizzical look at Reid. I wondered if he was marking his territory, so to speak. I touched my neck, remembering the diamond necklace that I’d worn at the club. It was Holden’s warning to all the men that I was untouchable. I cringed as I recalled Opal and Kassandra’s words about how women trusted women. I doubted it had crossed Holden’s mind … that he’d protected me from Tim and other men, but not the women.
I glanced at Reid. “We should have some fun and make a bet on the DNA results.”
Reid’s forehead creased. “I don’t have any money.”
“And what are we going to bet against?” Jace asked. “I mean, I’m almost certain they’re related. But the big question is how. Is he a brother or cousin?”
“So, Kassandra would be his mom if they were cousins.” I grimaced. “Shit. No. If she’s his mother, we’re going to ignore it and claim you’re brothers.”
“No kidding,” Holden muttered. “Tim, my father, is a piece of shit, but I don’t think he’s anything like Kassandra,” he said to Reid.
Reid’s expression morphed from happy to disgusted. “I hope we get some answers soon. I never cared before, but if we are …” Reid leaned forward, his intense gaze connecting with Holden’s. “But if you’re my brother, it means that I have family. That’s all I’m interested in.”
“You have family anyway.” I reached for Reid’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. He looked at me, his dark eyes filling with adoration.
“I know,” he whispered, his voice gruff and haunted.
Butterflies fluttered in the pit of my stomach. The warmth of Reid’s palm spread up my arm, sending tingles through my body. I pulled away and smiled before I gave Holden my attention. What the hell had just happened? Why had I liked his touch? Oh, God. I was confused as hell. I hadn’t considered Reid more than a friend, but something had transpired between us—in front of Holden. I chewed on my bottom lip, worry blossoming in my chest. I needed Brynn. Badly. Maybe she could explain things to me.
Chapter Twenty
Twenty minutes later, Zayne stopped at an iron gate. I looked around the property as he pulled into the driveway and parked the car.
“I know today will be intense, but if you think about it, take a look at the details of the house. I would love to build a log home for us.” Hope flickered across his handsome face.
My brows shot up. “Really?” He had no idea how much I loved the idea. In Montana, there were a lot of log homes, but not many in Spokane.
“Yeah. If you want, I’ll take you to the lake property after we visit Brynn.”
“Yes! I would love to see it.”
I filed out of the car behind Holden, then threw my arms around his neck. “I love you. We could live in a tent for all I care. The important thing is having you next to me.”
Holden brought me closer, then gave me a sweet kiss. “Love you, too.” He smoothed my hair and sighed. “Are you ready to talk to Brian?”
“No, but I don’t have a choice. Plus, I need to know if Kassandra and Opal are in custody. I’ve only been home twenty-four hours, but in some ways it seems longer.”
“I don’t want to overload you. Regardless of how you feel, your emotions and brain are still processing. It’s going to take time. One minute you’ll think you’re okay, the next …” Holden massaged the back of his neck with his free hand. “As far as Opal and Kassandra, they had better be in custody. If so, I’d like to pay them a visit,” Holden said between clenched teeth. He slid his arm around my waist as we followed Zayne up the sidewalk and to the front door.
Zayne waltzed in as though he owned the place, and I grinned. It felt good to laugh. The last three weeks had been full of pain and sheer terror. At times I wondered if I would ever experience happiness again. But here I was.
Nearly tripping over my feet, I gasped as we entered the living room. The floors were stunning, with red and blonde woven into the wood. The matching ceiling accentuated the dark rafters. Normally I didn’t like the red, but it was softer with the mix. I gripped Holden’s muscular bicep and beamed up at him. “It’s beautiful.”
Holden rubbed my back as we entered the living room. “So are you. I love seeing your face light up. It makes me happy.” Pierce, Sutton, and Brian stood in the middle of the space, talking quietly.
“Boss,” Zayne said as we neared the small group.
“Hey, everyone. It’s good to see you all.” Pierce nodded at us.
Sutton didn’t hesitate as she gave me a big hug. “How are you doing?” Concern danced across her beautiful features. “Were you able to get any sleep?”
“A little bit.”
“Hi, Reid.” Sutton patted him on his arm. “It’s nice to see you as well.”
“Likewise.” Reid shoved his hands into his pockets, suddenly appearing shy.
Jace greeted everyone, then we all sat next to each other on the black couch, the soft leather dipping beneath our weight. Zayne stood behind Sutton, who sat in the matching recliner across from us. Brian sat in the additional wingback chair with Pierce behind him. Pierce crossed his arms over his massive chest and rocked back and forth on his heels. I hadn’t spent much time with Pierce, but I was pretty sure something was up—something big.
Brian leaned forward and looked at Reid and me. “How are you two holding up? I can’t imagine what this has been like for you.”
“I’m just grateful we’re home.” I glanced at Reid, and he nodded in agreement.
“Thank you for all the help,” Reid added.
“I’m glad it turned out the way it did, and everyone can start to adjust to their life of freedom.” Brian looked at Holden. “Have you had time to tell her about your hypnosis and mom, yet?”
Holden cleared his throat. “We talked about it this morning. Apparently, it wasn’t my mom I saw, it was her twin.”
Brian nodded. “Your aunt’s name is Kassandra Winfield. It took some digging, but we were finally able to verify her identity.”
“She’s not my aunt. I won’t ever claim to be related to a monster.” Holden’s fury was almost tangible as it seeped from his pores.
I dug my nails into Holden’s muscular leg, terrified to ask the next question, but I needed answers. We all did. “Does this mean she’s in custody?”
Brian leaned back in his seat, his expression morphing from business to compassion. As I scanned left, right, then did another sweep, I lost my breath. Everyone was on edge. This wasn’t good. At all.
“Kassandra and Opal fled and have basically disappeared. We’re searching for them, but it’s best if you and Reid lay low until we are able to locate and arrest them. We think we have a lead on Michelle, so hopefully we will be closing in on her soon.”
Tears prickled my eyes. My knees quaked, and nausea bubbled in my belly. “They know about Holden. Where he lives, his job … Becky-Michelle, too.” I slapped my hand over my mouth, muffling the cry that fought to be released. “Michelle is crazy. She fed the FBI information to keep you off her trail. She hated me before, but now …” Wide-eyed, my focus landed on my boyfriend.
Holden slipped his arm around my shoulders. “Babe, we’re keeping security. Also, we can still see Brynn in Portland. We’ll stay tucked away at the hotel.”
I nodded, tears streaming down my cheeks. My pulse kicked up a notch as I glanced at Reid. He was stone-still. If I hadn’t focused, I’m not sure if I would have realized he was even breathing. I squeezed his arm. “We’re safe.”
Reid’s attention bounced from Holden to me, and I hoped I wouldn’t burn in Hell for lying to him. Nothing about this seemed safe.
“I think since Reid is also involved, two bodyguards would work better,” Pierce said. “Especially while you’re in Portland.”
“Yes, please,” I blurted before Holden had a chance to respond.
“Is Vaughn available? River and Brynn already know him. I want them to be as comfortable as possible,” Holden explained.
“I need to check the schedule, but I want to say yes,” Sutton added. She retrieved her phone from the end table and tapped the screen. “He just finished an assignment. When are you going to Portland?” she asked Holden.
“Our flight is booked for seven tonight.”
“Cancel the flights and keep your money. I’ll fly you all down,” Pierce said. “You don’t want to share a small space with a bunch of strangers when Brynn’s immune system is already compromised. If you even have a cold, you won’t be able to see her.”
Fuck. I hadn’t thought of that.
“Let me pay you, then,” Holden said to Pierce.
Pierce waved him off. “I don’t want or need your money, keep it. This is a friend helping friends.”
“Thank you,” I said, my voice cracking with emotion. “I haven’t been able to see Brynn yet, and …”
Jace leaned forward and peered around Reid at me. “She’s ready to see you, too.”
I rubbed my arms, fighting off a chill caused by my nerves and not the temperature. “Have you found any evidence concerning Catherine? What about Tim?”
“We haven’t found anything connecting Catherine to Opal, Kassandra, or the sex ring. As far as Tim, from the tracker and recording device that was planted in his car, we learned that he tried to negotiate to bring you home. He knows the kidnapper, which makes sense now that we understand that Opal and Kassandra are related to Catherine. What we don’t know is which one he was speaking with. We never heard the other person during his phone calls.”
“Do you have enough evidence to arrest him? I realize the recordings aren’t admissible, but what about connecting him to burning my club to the ground?” Holden asked.
Brian’s intense gaze rested on us. “We haven’t heard anything from Tim at all. The tracker showed that he was in Portland and at the Knight Center where your friend Brynn is being treated. Do you happen to know anything about that? Did he see her?”
Holden didn’t miss a beat, but his body stiffened ever so slightly against mine. “I left a voicemail for him and mentioned that she was sick. He’s known her since she was a little girl, so I figured someone should tell him. He visited her.”
Brian’s attention held steady as he continued. “Did Brynn mention how the visit went, or did you see him when he was there? I know you and your friends have been flying back and forth between Spokane and Portland.”
