Love square, p.16
Love Square, page 16
“You what?” I screech in his face, dropping my chopsticks.
“I, uh, got really trashed the first night you left. I couldn’t stop imagining the two of you together and I wanted to make it all go away. She showed up at the bar with a couple other officers and one thing led to another and we ended up fucking in my car that night.” He looks down at the floor.
The bastard doesn’t even have the balls to look me in the face.
“Have you guys been seeing each other since that day? Were you with her the day you showed up at my house and gave me an ultimatum?” I really hope he tells me the truth. I have a feeling I need to know this.
“No. It was a one-time thing. Any time I saw her after that, it was never anything other than platonic between us.”
“So the two of you were at training together?” I ask before picking my chopsticks back up and taking another bite, anxious to get to the rest of his story.
“Yes. She sat with me in the bar and we started talking about what happened between me and you. The more I drank, the more we talked. She started out giving me advice. Then she started moving in closer, her hands inching up my thigh and before I knew it we were going back up to her hotel room and having sex. I woke up the next morning and couldn’t remember anything. At first, I thought it was you next to me and that the dream I was having wasn’t a dream at all. But then she rolled over and I realized I’d screwed up.”
“You expect me to believe you thought you were having sex with me and not her? That’s awfully convenient.” I’m sickened by the thought that he’d use that as an excuse.
“No, I’m not saying that all. Look, I tried to stay away from her after that but she was everywhere. One thing led to another and we slept together again a couple nights later. And I don’t know, she just started to grow on me. She reminds me a lot of you, but at the same time she’s different. It’s like getting the best of both worlds. I get to be with this amazing person, but I don’t have to hide it either.” He shrugs and looks down at his food, avoiding looking at me.
Listening to him talk about her, I feel the bile rising in my throat. Suddenly I’m up and running into the bathroom to heave into the toilet. Jacob comes in and pulls my hair back from my face. “You okay?”
I gasp in between heaves. When there’s nothing left in my stomach, I rest my head against the toilet and close my eyes. That sucked big time.
Jacob sets a cool wash cloth on the back of my neck and after a few minutes I start to feel human again.
“Sorry, I don’t know what came over me.” He grabs my hands and lifts me up off the floor. I rinse my mouth out and turn to see him watching me from the doorway. I walk towards him and he wraps his arms around me. I rest my head on his chest. Even though this feels amazing, the moment feels poignant; like it might be one of the last times we do this.
“Let’s go sit back down and finish talking, unless you don’t feel up to it,” he says while pulling away from me.
“I’ll be okay. I’d rather we get everything out in the open,” I say as we both head back to the living room.
“Now that you know about Brooke, will you tell me what happened with you and Aiden?” He asks as we settle back on the floor.
“He saw text messages between us on my phone the day my grandfather died. He just waited to confront me about it. I put it all out on the table, everything I’ve been thinking and feeling. Then we decided it was best for me to stay with Michelle for a while. He came to see me afterward and apologized for some of the things he said when we were arguing. He told me he wants to try and make things work. I asked him for some time apart to decide what I really wanted though.”
I get up on my knees and move towards him. “After licking my wounds for a while, I realized I owed it to myself to see what could be between us without all the sneaking around and baggage of me being married. I was looking for you to tell you I want to be with you. That I love you.” I place my hands on his shoulders and hold my breath, waiting for him to respond. I know I shouldn’t want this after finding out the whole story behind his relationship with Brooke. I just can’t seem to stop myself.
“I love you too, Sam. So damn much. I’ve been so hurt and lonely waiting for you.” His hands grip my hips and I move my arms around his shoulders, closing the gap between us.
“Does that mean you’re going to stop seeing Brooke?” I ask before licking my lips. My eyes are trained on his mouth and I’m finding it hard to hold back what my body is begging me to do.
“I don’t know. I have feelings for her.” He shrugs and his fingers dig into my hips when I brush my breasts against his chest.
“Do you love her?” I have to know. If he does, I’ll walk away. I won’t put him through the turmoil I’ve been living with for all these months.
He shakes his head. “No, it’s too soon for that. I just don’t want to hurt her. I understand now how you must have felt all this time, being torn between me and Aiden.”
“Jake, I don’t know how to let you go.” I lean in and press a kiss to his lips. He starts to pull away so I beg, “Please don’t make me stop.”
When he doesn’t pull back any further, I move my hands up and cup his face and kiss him again. I tilt my head and take the kiss deeper, my tongue diving into his mouth and gliding along his.
His fingers glide along my thighs, up under my skirt before brushing against my core. I gasp at how good it feels. He continues tormenting me with those light brushes. I pull my shirt over my head and unclasp my bra, throwing them on the couch. My hands grab my breasts, silently offering them to him. His mouth closes over a nipple and sucks voraciously right before his finger slips past my panties and plunges into my body. My hips start circling rhythmically against the movement of his fingers. My orgasm is going to be quick and hard. His tongue paints a line across my chest on its way to my other breast. He continues his rhythm until I’m screaming out his name and my pussy is convulsing around his fingers.
I reach down and slip my hand into his gym shorts, freeing his long, thick cock. I lean down and close my mouth around it as I take him all the way in, until he’s deep in my throat. I continue to work him with my mouth hard and fast. I use my hand to stroke him while my mouth applies the perfect amount of suction to the head.
“Shit. I’m going to come,” he warns me as he tries to pull me off him. I’m not ready to stop though. I want him to come in my mouth. I’ve missed his taste.
He laces his fingers in my hair and holds my head in place while he fucks my mouth. He only does this when he’s wild with passion and extremely close to the edge. He shoves himself deep in my throat and comes in long, hot spurts. I have to work hard to swallow it all.
Sitting up, I undo my belt and the buttons on my skirt and stand so it can slide down my legs. I ease my panties down and they join my skirt in a heap on the floor. Jacob stares up at me from the floor, his eyes focused on my bare and swollen pussy.
I get back on the floor and move slowly towards him on my knees. I trail my fingers up over his leg while moving up his body. I plant hot, wet kisses along his collarbone and down his chest, stopping at his nipples to lave each one with my tongue. His hands grab my head and pull my lips to his, taking them in a passionate kiss. I move my right leg over him and straddle his lap. I reach down to grab his dick and guide him to my opening before sliding down over his length. I’m almost fully seated on him, when he abruptly stops me.
“Wait… wait… we can’t do this.” He pushes me away and stands, pulling his shorts up. His hands keep running through his hair while he paces around the room.
“Why not?” I’m humiliated by the fact that he pushed me away. I can’t believe I misread the situation.
“Because we’re no further ahead than we were before. I don’t want you to think I’m doing this out of spite, but I want to see where things will go with Brooke. The problem is the second I touch you, I lose all rational thought. I think we need to spend some more time apart.”
“Oh, that’s rich. I can’t believe this. It’s like a really bad dream. I guess karma really is a bitch,” I curse as I start to dress. My movements are jerky due to the fact that I’m fuming right now.
“I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you. I just want to be honest with you. I understand more now than ever how someone can care about two people. I don’t want to string either of you along. Please don’t take it personally, you of all people should get where I’m coming from. I just need to do what’s right for me, and to do that, I need some more time.”
“Whatever you say, I just can’t promise I’ll be waiting when you realize you’ve made a mistake.” I grab my purse off the table and storm out the door, slamming it on my way. I can’t believe this is happening right now. I can’t wrap my head around the fact he told me he loves me in one breath and then basically told me he’s leaving me for Brooke in the next. This is one seriously fucked up situation.
*****
The sun is shining and the day has a nice crisp, fall feel to it. Fall is my favorite time of year so I’m welcoming the fact that this week in unseasonably cool. I pull my sweater over my head just as the doorbell rings.
I open the door to find Aiden standing there looking utterly delicious. He’s wearing faded jeans, and a white t-shirt under a zipped up blue sweater. I love it when he wears blue, it gives his eyes an iridescent quality that makes it hard to look away from. His face breaks out into a grin when he looks up at me.
“You look beautiful, sweetheart. There’s a certain glow about you today.” He lifts my hand to his mouth and presses a soft kiss on my knuckles. A little shiver races up my spine at the contact.
“Thanks. You don’t look so bad yourself,” I wink at him and head to his red Ford F-150. He lifts me up into the truck before getting in and pulling out of the driveway.
On the drive to the orchard we hold hands like we used to whenever we went somewhere together. It feels nice and comforting.
“How’s work going?” I ask trying to make conversation.
“Good. It’s finally starting to wind down now that the Sullivan project is underway. I feel like I can finally breathe again.” He clears his throat before continuing, “I wanted to apologize for how consumed I’ve been with work lately. I should have paid more attention to you than I did.”
“Thank you for that. Look, we can’t go back so let’s not beat a dead horse by talking about it anymore.”
We park and Aiden comes around to help me down from the truck. When he sets me on my feet, I get a little light-headed and have to brace myself on his arm. “You okay, Sam?” He asks concernedly.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just had a bit of vertigo,” I say with a small smile trying to shake it off.
Satisfied with my response, he holds my hand as we walk up to the farm stand at the edge of the orchard and grab a basket to fill. The little old lady, Norma, who runs the stand, greets us with a friendly smile and wave. We’ve been coming to this orchard every year since we moved here. She’s such a sweet soul.
We walk hand in hand through the paths and trees, picking apples and soaking in the peacefulness of the orchard. Neither of us talks much, though. It’s not necessary in order to have a good time.
Aiden picks a crisp, red apple and takes a bite. He holds the apple to my mouth for me to bite. When I do, the juices dribble down my chin onto my neck. I laugh at how messy it is. He leans in and licks the juice off me and starts nibbling on my lower lip.
“Mmm… you taste delicious, Mrs. Parker,” he murmurs in between kisses.
“So do you, Mr. Parker,” I whisper back, my hands wrapping around his shoulders while my mouth dives back in for another taste of his.
The sound of young kids running up the hill makes us pull back from one another.
“Let’s go get dinner so I can get you alone in a dark movie theater and can kiss you for hours,” he says with a devilish grin and a wag of his eye brows.
“I like the sound of that.”
We stop at a pizza place on our way to the theater. There’s nothing better than a nice, greasy slice of New York style cheese pizza and this place has the best. I can feel Aiden’s eyes watching me while I eat yet another piece of the sinfully delicious pizza.
“I’m surprised you went for a second piece, honey. Normally one of these monstrosities is enough for you.”
“I know right. I’m not sure why, but it’s like I was craving it. I just can’t stop eating.” I wipe my mouth and throw the napkin on my empty plate before heading to the restroom so we can leave for the movies.
We decide to see the new Superman movie. I’m a huge fan of the “man of steel”. I’ve had a crush on almost every single actor that’s played Clark Kent over the years. It’s a weakness of mine.
Aiden chooses a seat towards the back of the theater, where we’ll have some privacy. Every time we reach for the popcorn and our fingers brush, a little shiver works through me. I can’t believe I’m getting turned on by touching his hand.
I look over and find Aiden watching me with a salacious look on his face. He grabs my neck and pulls me in for a mind blowing kiss. It’s as if we’re feeding off each other during that kiss. Not even Superman could pull me away from the way he’s plundering my mouth.
He nuzzles his nose along mine and whispers, “You crush me, honey. I love you so damn much.”
Tears fill my eyes at his words. I needed to hear them so much. We finish watching the movie wrapped in each other’s arms. I feel so safe and warm right now. I wish we could stay like this forever.
The drive back to Michelle’s is filled with plenty of sexual tension. I want him with a ferocity that I’m not used to. There’s something in my soul that’s calling out to his right now.
We park and he comes around to open my door and help me out of the truck. As soon as my feet hit the ground, I grab his collar and pull him towards me for a hot, wet kiss. I run my hands up and through his hair, tugging a little to get him excited. He grabs my ass and lifts me, my legs wrapping around his waist. He presses me against the side of the truck and takes the kiss deeper. He grinds his erection into me, my hips rolling to put more pressure on my mound as it rubs against him.
I start to pant with my impending orgasm. The tingle starts in my core and radiates down through my toes, making them curl in my shoes. I rub against him faster and harder. My head falls back against the truck as I explode in a tremendously intense orgasm.
Aiden pulls back and sets me on my feet, his forehead resting against mine.
“We need to stop. I don’t want to make love to you again until you choose me. I want there to be no mistake that you’re mine when I’m inside you,” he whispers, his breath panting across my still wet lips.
“Aiden, I’m sure. I need to feel you. I need you inside me like you wouldn’t believe.” I reach down and cup his bulge. “I want your cock, honey. Please.”
He growls when I squeeze tighter. His hand pulls mine away, pulling it to his mouth where he kisses my fingertips. “We’ll both know when it’s right. Let’s get you inside before you get cold.”
He walks me to the doorstep, kisses me breathless and leaves me horny and alone. What is it with men leaving me high and dry? It’s really starting to weigh on my self-esteem.
Chapter Eighteen
I have officially lost my mind.
I logged into Jacob’s email last night. I had to do it. I have been going out of my mind wanting to know more about this Brooke chick. I’ve also been dying to know what Jacob has been up to. I haven’t heard from him in over a week. I texted him the other night and never received a reply back.
It wasn’t like accessing his email was that hard to do since he gave me his password once upon a time. It’s not my fault he hasn’t changed it!
So now that I’ve learned that Brooke’s last name is Dugan, I’m moving forward with my cyber-stalking. The Internet is a wealth of knowledge and I’m greedy for all I can get. From what I’ve found so far, she just turned thirty years old and grew up in Maryland. She moved to D.C. about two years ago and was promoted to Jacob’s department four months ago. Apparently, she comes from money. Her father is some big real estate mogul, the likes of Donald Trump. I’ve also secured her home address, phone number for her land line, and her email address.
Instead of appeasing me, this knowledge is only fueling my obsession. It’s like I have to know everything about her. As the famous quote says, "Know thy enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles, you will never be defeated.” And this is one battle I’m not ready to lose.
Based on an email Jacob sent Brooke last night, they are planning on having lunch down at Camille’s Sidewalk Café today. I’m going on a reconnaissance mission to spy on them. I feel possessed by jealousy and rage. I rationally try to talk myself out of it, but the devil is back on my shoulder persuading me that this is the only way to get Jacob back, whether I want to keep him or not, and that remains to be seen. Right now, my only goal is to get him away from that tramp.
I dress in black yoga pants and a long-sleeve black t-shirt. I have on black ballet flats and my hair is pulled back in a ponytail. I grab a blue floral scarf out the closet and a big pair of sunglasses, reminiscent of Jackie Kennedy. I’m hoping that by getting there early enough I can hide out and watch them incognito.
“I’m heading out Michelle, see you in a bit,” I call out as I rush out the door before she can ask me where I’m going. I head into the city and park across the street from the café. I put on my glasses and wrap the scarf around my head to help hide my identity. Now all I can do is watch and wait.
Its fifteen minutes before they are supposed to be here when suddenly my passenger door flies open and a person jumps in. I scream as loud as I can as my heart races with adrenaline. Luckily, when I look over I see its Michelle. Judging by the look on her face, though, I shouldn’t be glad to see her.
“What in the hell do you think you’re doing, Samantha Jean?” She yells at me while shaking her finger in my face.
