All the wright moves, p.17
All the Wright Moves, page 17
“Neither of us planned this,” I shot back.
“The deal was that we would try this until I went back to LA.” His eyes hardened, as sharp as daggers. “You said I made my choice. So, I made it. You can’t expect me to give up a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”
“Of course not. I would never tell you to give up the band.”
“There’s no compromise here,” he said. “Neither of us will bend. You won’t leave, and I can’t stay. Not for you. Not for anyone.”
My heart crunched like broken glass being stepped on.
Why had I thought we could work this out? Why had I thought that love would be enough? When in my life had love ever been enough?
I’d loved my mom with all of my heart, and still, she’d chosen Campbell over the rest of our family. I’d loved Campbell, and he’d chosen LA. I’d loved August, and he’d chosen Tamara.
It tracked that when I fell in love again, I’d have my heart ripped out of my still-beating chest. Every person I’d ever held on to picked someone else over me. I’d thought that I was moving on from it. West had shown me how to move on, but he was a new source of the same problem.
I wasn’t enough.
I’d never ever been enough.
I took a step back as the realization slammed into me like a high-speed train.
“I can’t do this,” I said and brushed past him and toward my bedroom.
“Nora, what are you doing?”
“Leaving.”
“What?” he asked in shock. “Where are you going?”
“I don’t know. To Hollin’s.” Then, I shook my head. “No, my dad’s. I can’t stay here.”
“I’m leaving tomorrow.”
“Then, you can spend your last night alone,” I said with a shake of my head. “Go live your big dream. I can’t be here and love you. Everything about this place is you. It’s all you.”
“Nora…”
“You made your choice, West.” I whipped around to face him. “Tell me you love me. Tell me we can work this out.”
I waited. I hoped. I prayed.
But West stared at me and remained silent. Those words didn’t pass his lips. He wasn’t going to try with me. It wasn’t worth it for him.
I’d settled for less than I deserved once before. I wouldn’t do it again. So, I turned my back on his silence and packed my suitcase. I held the tears back long enough to get into the car, but then they unleashed until I couldn’t even see the windshield. I pulled over and let all the devastation loose.
27
Weston
I couldn’t sleep.
Nora’s words rang through my mind. I’d totally fucked it up. Utterly and completely. There was nothing I could say to fix it. I couldn’t tell her I loved her. She wouldn’t go, and I couldn’t stay. Long-distance was never going to work. There was no compromise here. There was only the end, like we’d planned from the start.
After tossing and turning all night, I packed my suitcases, picking my closet clean. Without Nora here, I’d have to figure out what to do with the place. Whitt would probably look over it until I could decide.
Two knocks came from the front door, and then it opened.
“Knock, knock,” Whitt said.
I’d asked him this morning if he’d drive me to the airport. He’d texted back, asking why Nora wasn’t doing it. I hadn’t been able to tell him the truth and just said she was busy.
“Wow, you look like shit,” Whitt said with a laugh. “Too much partying last night?”
I ran a hand along the back of my head. “Nora and I…fuck, I don’t know what you’d call it. We got into a huge fight, and she left.”
“She left the house?” He arched an eyebrow.
I nodded. “I guess we broke up.”
Whitt crossed his arms, but he didn’t look surprised. “Because you’re leaving?”
“Yeah.”
“Hmm,” Whitt said. He reached for one of my suitcases. “All right.”
“What does that mean?”
“Don’t you usually know?”
Yeah, he was right. I sighed. “You think it’s for the better.”
“Isn’t that why you did it?”
I ran my hands down my face. “I don’t even know anymore.”
Whitt put a hand on my shoulder. “Look, I like Nora. I like you with Nora. You seemed steady. She seemed happy. But how would it even work? You’re going to be a thousand miles away. And then on tour for most of the year. That’s not even possible.”
“That’s what I said to her.”
Still, it felt like every inhalation was glass in my lungs.
Whitt patted me twice. “You know it was the right thing to do.”
I followed him out to his car with the other suitcase. We loaded them up and headed back inside for the rest of my stuff and a stiff cup of coffee. Once we got in the car, I felt pulled toward Nora. She was at her dad’s. She was probably so pissed at me. Fuck. I hated leaving things like this.
“I feel like I should still talk to her one more time,” I told Whitt. “She was so angry when she left.”
“Oh no, you don’t. That is a bad idea.”
“What? Why?”
Whitt shot me an incredulous look. “Do you really not know? You just broke up with her.”
“I know, but not because I don’t care.”
“Does that change anything? Are you going to take her back?”
“No,” I told him.
“No. So, what will your presence do?”
I slumped in my seat. “Nothing. It’ll hurt her worse.”
“Exactly. You’re making the right choice. It doesn’t feel good right now, but wait until you’re in LA, playing with the band. This is what you wanted. What you struggled for. It’ll get better.”
He was right. I knew he was right. And still, it didn’t make me feel any better. I didn’t deserve to feel any better. We’d agreed that this was what we’d do. We’d agreed. And I’d been the idiot for thinking that would matter.
We arrived in the studio in LA to fanfare. Bobby shook my hand relentlessly. The contracts had been emailed to me last night. Though Viv had offered her attorney’s info, I felt better having someone unrelated to the band look into it.
So, I’d called my dad…
As much as I’d wanted to avoid him at all costs, he had the contacts I needed. He’d readily agreed to have his attorney take a look at it. And by the time I’d landed in LA, I had revised contracts in hand. That simple.
Sometimes, I forgot exactly how much power Owen Wright had. He didn’t run Wright Construction anymore, but he sat on the board of directors for other corporations in Seattle now. And the man still knew how to properly throw his weight around.
Bobby and the studio agreed to the revisions, and then I signed the new paperwork. I was officially a member of Cosmere.
“Whoa,” I whispered as soon as the papers were signed.
The band congratulated me, and pictures were taken. Blaire stood off to the side with a wide smile on her face. She’d noticed that something was off with me, but I’d avoided her, so I didn’t have to have that conversation.
We were immediately whisked to an interview to talk about me joining, then an actual photoshoot, and then a marketing meeting.
By Friday, when we were slated into Jimmy Kimmel, I’d barely had a moment to myself, except when I was sleeping. Well, when I should have been sleeping but instead tossed and turned all night. When I managed to drift off, I would wake, feeling like I’d been on an airplane the whole time, jet-lagged and exhausted.
“We’re overworking you,” Campbell said with a laugh.
I jerked awake in the car on the way to the talk-show set. “Fuck, sorry, dude.”
“Too much excitement?”
“Something like that.”
“It’ll calm down until the album comes out, and then we’ll be go, go, go for the next year. Press tours are exhausting, but there’s nothing like a world tour. You already know all about that though.”
“I’m not sure you’d say my experience as a part of a backup band would be comparable to your world tour.”
Campbell shrugged. “You’ll do fine. Just need to get some sleep.”
“Yeah. Sure. Sleep.”
I couldn’t tell Campbell the reason I wasn’t sleeping. I’d made my choice. He wouldn’t exactly be pleased to hear that I’d hurt his sister after all. Not when I’d promised I wouldn’t go anywhere near her…and, well, that was too little, too late.
The worst was that I missed her. I wanted her here with me in LA, living through the best moments of my life. Every single one of them would have been better with her here, as she had been in New York City. But that wasn’t possible.
We arrived at the set and were taken upstairs to a dressing room. Someone did hair and makeup, much to my chagrin. Apparently, those bags under my eyes were more noticeable than I’d thought.
Then, it was nearly time for our interview when an assistant poked her head inside. “Visitor for Weston Wright.”
I blinked in confusion. Who the hell even knew that I was here? I had some friends in LA that I knew from touring. We’d met up a couple times when I was here for six months to record the album, but none of us were close enough for this. Also, none of them could get backstage at Jimmy Kimmel.
I got to my feet and followed the assistant out of the dressing room. And there, standing backstage, as if it were the most normal thing in the world, was Owen Wright.
“Dad?” I asked in confusion. “What are you doing here? How are you here?”
“It’s good to see you, West.”
My dad wrapped an arm around me and pulled me into a hug. I was too shocked to protest. I couldn’t figure out what he was doing here. What was the angle? Yes, he knew I was part of Cosmere now. He’d helped with the paperwork after all. But he hadn’t told me he was going to be in LA. He hadn’t told me he’d be here.
“I don’t understand.”
“I had business in town. I wanted to surprise you,” he said with an easy, charming smile on his face. The smile he always used to get what he wanted.
“I’m surprised,” I said stiffly.
He laughed. “Don’t be upset. I’m proud of you. I wanted to see you perform. How could I miss this big of an interview when I’m in town?”
“I can’t believe they let you backstage.”
“I have connections when I need to use them. Do you not want me here?”
“I do,” I admitted reluctantly.
As conflicted as I was about my father, I didn’t want to send him away. He was here for me. Just me. He’d always gotten along better with Whitt in some ways because they both were in business. As much as he’d tried to understand me, we were too different. It was what had gotten me to go to Lubbock to find out the truth when Whitton could have continued to be blinded by what was happening.
But despite his deceptions, he was still my father. He might have a catch for what he was doing here. It might be as simple as to curry favor now that I was valuable. I still couldn’t hate that he was here. Not when I needed the reassurance.
“I can’t wait to see you out there. I’m so proud of you, son.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
My dad was too intuitive though. He tilted his head and assessed me for the first time. Now that I hadn’t immediately sent him away. “You don’t seem as happy as I thought you would be. Shouldn’t this be your victory?”
I sighed heavily. “Yeah, it should.”
“What’s going on? The dream not as good as you imagined?”
“No, that’s not it. Cosmere is the best band. I’m so grateful to be here, with them, getting to do what I love.”
“But,” he said.
“But…I left someone behind.”
“In Lubbock?”
I nodded. “There was this girl.”
My dad laughed softly. “Isn’t there always?”
“Yeah, I guess.” I ran a hand back through my hair before remembering that the hair stylist had spent a decent amount of time making it fall into place exactly. I dropped my hand. So much for that. “She knew I was leaving for LA eventually, but things got sort of serious with us. But when I got the job offer, we broke up.”
“That’s a difficult situation. I’m sorry to hear that.” And he legitimately sounded sincere about it.
“I asked her to come with me,” I admitted, crossing my arms and looking away, “but her job is in Lubbock. Neither of us would bend.”
“Then it wasn’t meant to be.”
I frowned. I hated hearing that. Nora and I had felt…right. We had felt like I was suddenly coming up for air. Living without her right now was torture. How could this be right?
“Someone has to bend in a relationship for it to work,” my dad continued. “That’s just how it is.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You never bent in a relationship.”
“I bent more than you know.”
My anger grew at those words. “You don’t get to sound superior here. You ruined all our lives with your obstinate behavior. You had two relationships, two families. You made everyone compromise but you. I don’t want to be like you.”
My dad’s face fell at those words. “You’re right.”
“What?” I asked in surprise. I’d been expecting an argument.
“It was my own actions that got me here. I should have been honest. Then, I wouldn’t be alone…without either of my families.” My dad sighed again. “I’m trying to make it right here. I’m trying to bend for the people I care about now. Be there for you and your siblings when I wasn’t. I’d do the same for Jordan and Julian if they let me back into their lives.”
“Do you think you deserve another chance?”
“No,” he said simply. “But I want one.”
His body sagged in on itself at the admission. It was then that I could see the gray threading deeper through his brown hair. The circles under his eyes. The weight that had rounded out his middle. Signs that things were not as good for him as he always made them seem to be.
It was hard to feel pity for him after all he’d done, but I did. I felt it then.
After a beat of silence, I said, “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Good. And I’m sorry about your girl back home. I don’t know if it helps, but I think you made the right decision.”
It didn’t. It really didn’t.
But it was the decision that I’d made. I couldn’t change anything about it. I just had to live with it. And learn to live without her.
28
Nora
“I’m going to get Hollin over to talk to you, Nora,” my dad said, following me around the house.
I grabbed my heels. I needed to go back to West’s house to get more clothes. I’d been too exhausted and emotional to pay attention to what I was stuffing into my suitcase. I needed more work clothes. And I needed to get out of my dad’s house.
“Don’t you dare,” I snapped, whirling on him.
“Well, you aren’t listening to me.”
“I’m not ready to talk about it. I’m not ready to deal with anything,” I told him. I waved at my face. “Please, I can’t cry before I go to work. I don’t have time to redo my makeup.”
My dad deflated. He absentmindedly rapped his cane against the baseboard. “I’m worried about you. You show up at home in the middle of the night, sobbing. I need to know how to help.”
“You can’t help, Dad. I wish you could. I wish anyone could. But I promise that Hollin would only make it worse.”
“I can’t see how.”
Yeah, that was because he didn’t know what it was like to have overprotective brothers. Hollin would blow a gasket. He’d fly to LA and put his fist through Weston’s face himself. Or worse, call Campbell and have him do it. I didn’t want that to happen to West. I loved him too much to ruin his big break.
He’d been on Jimmy Kimmel on Friday night. I’d watched with my dad and even managed to keep it together until the interview was over. To pretend to be excited to see Cosmere on TV. West was getting everything he wanted. Good for him.
“I love you, Dad.” I kissed him back. “I’ll see you after work.”
“Love you, too. But how long are you planning to stay?”
“Trying to get rid of me?”
“Of course not. You can stay as long as you want, Nor. I’m concerned.”
“I’ll start looking for my own place.”
“I’m not kicking you out,” he said quickly. “I like having you here. I want to help.”
But he couldn’t.
So, I smiled wanly and headed out to my truck. I was not looking forward to going back to West’s for clothes. If I had a friend, I could probably convince them to go with me, but who did I have?
I bit my lip.
Hmm…
I bet I did have someone who would do that with me. I pulled up Eve’s number and dialed, connecting it to the Bluetooth in my truck.
“Hey,” Eve said. “What’s going on?”
“What are you doing tonight?”
“I have to show three houses and walk a couple through closing,” she said. “Why? Are you asking me out?”
I choked. “Uh, not exactly. I was wondering if you could help me with something.”
“Something that isn’t a date?” Eve teased.
“More like detoxing from a man.”
“Oh, count me in. What are we doing? Burning sage? Arranging crystals? Calling a demon?”
“Um, wow. That escalated quickly.”
“I’ve done this a time or two before.”
I giggled, and it felt good. “You’ve frequently called a demon?”
“Don’t knock it till you try it.”
“I’ll take your word for it. But, no, I need to get clothes from West’s place, but I don’t want to go in alone.”
Eve sighed softly. “I heard that he went back to LA. He dump you?”
“Pretty much.”
“And he kicked you out of his place? What a dick. I mean, Arnold Sinclair had me evicted. So, what do I know about men? But damn.”
