Feuds and reckless fury, p.9
Feuds and Reckless Fury, page 9
“Are you trying to get me killed?” he bellows at her. “You’re an insane, selfish bitch, Tammy!”
“Go back to your whores, Colin.” Momma shows him her middle finger even though it’s bad. “That’s where you’d rather be than here taking care of your son!”
“That’s fucking rich coming from you,” he growls. “Have you seen this shithole? It’s filthy, goddammit. And you want to call me the neglectful parent?”
Momma doesn’t clean that much, but I try to be a good boy and do it. My room is the easiest to keep clean because Momma doesn’t put her beer bottles or old used-up cigarettes or food wrappers in there. Plus, I’m scared of the mice. If I keep my room clean, they stay in the kitchen mostly and try to get into the cereal boxes or food left on the counters.
“I trusted you to keep my shit safe,” he snaps, making me jump higher than any time I see a mouse. “And you took it all. Why? So you and your worthless boyfriends could get fucked up?”
“Leave.” Momma stubs out her cigarette on the arm of the chair and then flicks it at him. “No one wants you here. Especially not your son.”
I don’t like it when she calls the bad man my daddy. He’s not like the daddies on television or in the books we have to read at school. My friend Felix, who’s not in my first-grade class, but rides the bus with me, has a nice daddy. His daddy is a police officer. I wish my daddy were a good guy who caught the bad ones.
“Find me the money,” Colin barks out. “I don’t care if you have to fuck everyone in this trailer park to get it. By Thursday, I better have that money or—”
“Or you’ll what?” Momma yells back. “Hit me? Whoopty-fucking-doo!”
He backhands her, sending her flying out of the chair and onto the floor. I run toward him without thinking, my small fists curled up. He grunts in surprise when I start wailing on his back. I’m only six and small for my age, but I’m angry at him for hurting my momma again.
Like he’s a Jedi, he flings me off of him. Then, he turns his mean stare on me. I don’t like his eyes. They’re dark brown like mine. But I’m not mean like him. I wish I had Momma’s green eyes.
Colin squats in front of me, grabbing my chin in his grip. I whimper because it hurts. He’s so big and strong, he could probably break my bones just by squeezing. That thought makes me shiver.
“Why do you always defend that bitch?” he demands, tilting his head to the side. “It’s because you’re a sissy momma’s boy, huh? Maybe I should take you with me. Make a man out of you.”
I try not to look into his scary eyes that sometimes look like a monster’s, instead choosing to look at the powder smeared on his nose. Same kind Momma and her boyfriends like to sniff up.
“He’s too much like you for that to happen,” Momma hisses at him. “You’ll be disappointed to discover your child is just another fucked-up version of you!”
Her words hurt my feelings, but I try to ignore them. It’s easy to do when I’m focused on the way his strong hand is nearly crushing my face in his grip.
“Get me my money, Tammy,” Colin says, staring at me with an angry scowl, “or I’ll take it out on the boy.” He flips out a sharp knife with his other hand, bringing it to my chest. “I could take payment by carving out his fucking heart.”
The pee leaks out even though I don’t want it to. He always scares me so bad I pee my pants. A frustrated cry escapes me.
“You’ve always been all talk, asshole,” Momma sneers, not at all sounding worried that he’s going to cut me open and make me die. “Get out of my house. I’ll have your money next week.”
Colin shoves me back, shaking his head in disgust. “Clean yourself up. You’re an embarrassment.” He rises to his feet and glares at Momma. “Don’t fuck me around, woman, or so help me you’ll regret it.”
He storms out of the trailer, slamming the door behind him. I shakily stand up as Momma does. She rushes over to me, and for a second, I think she’s going to hug me and tell me everything will be okay. That only happens when I daydream, though. Instead, she smacks me hard on the cheek. I start to cry, rubbing my cheek.
“You always make it worse when you show up pissing yourself!”
“I’m s-sorry, Momma. I was t-trying to s-save you.”
She grabs me by the arm, hurting me and making me cry out before she drags me back to my room. With a hard shove, she sends me falling onto my bed in my pee-soaked jammies. My blanket will smell like pee now.
“Go to bed. I can’t fucking deal with you right now.”
The door closes hard enough to shake the whole trailer. A mouse squeaks somewhere in my dark room. I scurry under the blanket even though I still have pee on me, hiding from the mouse that’s somewhere in my room.
I can’t wait to go to school tomorrow.
At least there aren’t mice running around at school, and the teachers are nice to me. The other kids are funny and have cool stories to tell. For a few hours each day, I feel like a normal boy.
I sit upright in bed, a cold sweat soaking through my clothes. For a second, my skin crawls as I make sense of my surroundings. I can almost smell the scent of cigarette smoke and pee lingering in the air. A shiver ripples through me at the thought of mice running all over the place. Quickly, I turn on the bedside lamp and let out a breath of relief to see my immaculate room, vermin free.
A quick peek at my phone tells me it’s just after five in the morning. Knowing I won’t get any more sleep, I swap my soaked T-shirt and shorts for my workout clothes. After pulling on my tennis shoes, I tiptoe downstairs to the house gym. It’s massive and much better equipped than the one at school. I’m surprised to already find Ryan in there running on the treadmill. Usually, it’s Dad up this early.
He stops the machine when he sees me, stopping to towel off the sweat. Even though he’s much older than Canyon, they’re so strikingly similar. Same dark hair. Same probing stare. They even smile the same way.
I clear my throat and nod in greeting. “Hey.”
“You’re up early.”
“Yeah.”
“Another nightmare?”
I flinch and cast my stare out the window that overlooks the wooded area behind where we live. “Something like that.”
“Stress sometimes taps on old memories,” Ryan says in a soft, fatherly tone. “It’s okay to acknowledge where you’ve come from and where you’ve gone.” He walks over to me, clutching my shoulder. “You’re safe now.”
I close my eyes, cringing at his words. Dad and Ryan were best friends long before they were lovers. It shouldn’t bother me that they know everything about the other, but in this instance, it does. It’s bad enough that Dad knows about all the horrible things I endured growing up, but having Ryan know too feels dangerous.
“Canyon’s coming to the wedding,” I blurt out, needing desperately to change the subject.
His brows fly up in surprise. “No shit? How the hell did you manage that one?”
“We negotiated a deal.” I shrug my shoulders, not meeting his gaze.
“A deal with Canyon is never good for the dealmaker,” he says with a chuckle. “Trust me, he’s swindled me out of money and talked me into getting him what he wants over the years. The boy has a silver tongue.”
Warmth surges to my balls as I remember how his tongue roved over my neck, taunting and teasing.
“Nothing I can’t handle. It’s fine.” I clear my thoughts and step away from him to start stretching. “He’s going to work on Carrie. Hopefully, she’ll come too.”
He sits down on a weight bench to watch me. “Hope so. She’s always been a tough nut to crack. More so than Canyon.” He smiles in my direction. “Thank you.”
“Not a big deal.”
“It is to me. You’re a good kid.”
He wouldn’t think that if he knew what I did to get Canyon to agree to go to the wedding. It would be mortifying if he ever found out. My only assurance that Ryan will never find out is that it’s Canyon’s dick in the picture and not mine. I seriously doubt Canyon would want pictures of his dick getting licked to come out, especially to his dad.
I continue through my stretches as he benches some weights, grunting with each lift. My mind is all over the place. I hate that it keeps going back to the past, the memories too fresh and painful for me to focus on my workout. Eventually, I give up and take a long shower. I stroke myself with the image of Canyon’s heated stare looking down at me as I put my tongue on his dick. I come with a growl, spurting my release under the hot spray of the shower.
Drying off, I dress for school and then pick up my phone. I send a text to him.
Me: I owe you a Coke.
Brother Lover: You owe me a lot more than a Coke. Soon we’ll figure it all out.
I stare at his words, wondering what that means, but since I wasted so much time in the shower, I need to get moving. Quickly, I tidy up my bathroom and make my bed. I tilt my head to the side, straining to hear any squeaks or scratching sounds that seem to still be so loud in my head from my dream.
Silence aside from Dad’s and Ryan’s muted voices downstairs.
I’m not in that trailer anymore.
I’m here. In the present. Dad is going to keep me. This will always be my home.
Too bad I won’t allow myself to actually believe that.
Canyon
Like the creepy stalker Naomi claims me to be, my eyes immediately find Alis the second I walk into first hour. His usual smugness is gone, and his spine is rigid. Messy blond hair hangs in his eyes and sticks up in a few spots as though he’s been tugging at it. Dark circles ring his eyes, and he seems paler than usual. Seeing him on edge puts me on edge.
Making a beeline straight for him, I sit behind him and lean forward to bring my mouth close to his ear.
“Afraid I’m going to kick your ass in this class?” I taunt, though lacking my usual venom.
He turns slightly, offering me his profile. A smirk tugs at the corner of his lips. “Never crossed my mind. We both know I’m better at everything.”
The urge to touch him is nearly maddening. I curl my hands into fists so I don’t do something stupid like run my fingers through his hair to smooth it back down.
“I haven’t sucked dick before, but I’m pretty sure I could outperform you there,” I throw back, my voice barely a whisper against his ear.
He shivers and turns his body more toward me. His dark eyes drink me in, ravenous and greedy. The heat that burns from him scorches into me. I catch the scent of lime, which makes my mouth water for another taste. Needing confirmation that I’ve done just that—tasted him—before, I let my eyes drift to the fading purple bruises on his neck. My dick thickens as I remember how I pinned him down and sucked on his neck.
“Stop looking at me like that,” he grumbles, his voice raspy. “It’s so…obvious.”
I sit back, burned by his words, darting my gaze around the classroom. No one is paying any attention to us. Except Naomi. When I shake my head in denial, she rolls her eyes at me before leaning forward to chat up Leon. I drag my stare back to Alis.
“Why do you look like shit, Wonderland? Nightmares keep you up all night?”
He flinches, shooting a nasty glare at me. “He told you?”
“Who?”
“Your dad.” His jaw clenches, and his brown eyes blaze with fury. “Unbelievable.”
“In case you forgot,” I grind out, irritated by his pissy attitude, “I don’t speak to my dad unless I have to. We certainly don’t talk about you.”
Relief floods through him, making his shoulders relax. “Oh.”
“You ratted yourself out, man,” I say with a vicious grin. “What could a rich, spoiled kid like you possibly have nightmares about? Losing your chair in orchestra to my baby sister? A flat tire on your Range Rover? Falling on your face at the track meet?”
“Fuck off.” He swivels back around, facing the front of the classroom.
I study how his entire body is coiled and tense. Whatever is going on with him doesn’t really have to do with me, I don’t think. For some reason, I want to know. Why? I’m not sure. It’s not like I even like the guy.
Liar.
While I wait for the bell to ring, I hunt online, searching for a new Daisuke cosplay wig. At last year’s Anime Con, I hated the fact that at least fifteen other people had the same black and orange-tipped wig. This year, I want something custom and different.
The bell rings and class begins, but my mind is still on Anime Con. Adapted to anime from a popular weekly manga serial published in a Tokyo magazine, Mubōna Ikari is popular at the conventions because it’s so widely watched and has been around for years. The two feuding families in the series—the Kinoshitas and the Miyazakis—spend all nine seasons battling for various reasons. Daisuke Kinoshita comes from a good family, but he’s restless and causes trouble. His nemesis, Chibi Miyazaki, lives with a notoriously evil Tokyo crime family but craves a normal life. The main battle between the two boys is that they continuously envy the other’s life. It isn’t until the fifth season that a tricky majo puts a spell on the boys, trading their bodies. At first, they enjoy the other’s life, but when they realize it’s not all they expected it to be, they soon want to go back home. After they’re switched back, they secretly form a friendship behind closed doors, and ultimately they find love with each other.
The bell rings again, and I shake away my daydreaming. There was a time when I’d get into so much trouble at school for sneak-reading Mubōna Ikari manga. My schoolwork always fell by the wayside as I got lost in Daisuke and Chibi’s world.
By the time I gather my things and step out of the classroom, Alis is nowhere to be found. My gaze drifts to where Naomi chats with Leon, and then I’m tracking Alis again. I find him at a vending machine, bent over to retrieve his drink. His jeans hug his ass, making me salivate. I can’t even lie to myself that he isn’t hot because my dick perks all the way up any time I see him.
I’m attracted to my enemy.
I don’t know what to do about it either.
“You going to tell me what has your panties in a twist?” I ask, leaning a shoulder against the machine.
He straightens and twists the cap off his Coke. “Nope.”
Our eyes remain locked as he tips the bottle up. I watch the dark liquid rush between his pouty lips and into his mouth. He swallows, and I track that movement too, fixated on how his Adam’s apple bobs. It makes me wonder just how far it would protrude with my dick pushed deep into it.
“Am I sucking you off right here in front of everyone?” Alis taunts, his wicked brown eyes flickering.
I glance over my shoulder, thankful no one is nearby. “You’d like that.”
“I know how you taste.” He steps closer, flashing his white teeth at me, reminding me of the semi-evil Chibi from Mubōna Ikari. “So, yeah, Voss, I’d like that.”
His tongue darts out of his mouth, licking over his bottom lip. I stifle a groan because I can practically feel the needy, wet feel of it on the tip of my dick again. If there weren’t a hallway full of our peers, I’d almost be tempted to grab the front of his shirt and haul him to me.
Then what?
Taste his taunting words right from his mouth.
I bet they taste like Coke and limes and a little bit like victory.
“Oh,” he says, his brown eyes burning into me. “I almost forgot. I owe you this.” He thrusts the Coke my way, shoving it against my chest. “From this morning.”
My hand curls around his smaller one that’s holding the soda. Images of him in his bed with his hand stroking his dick have a low growl rumbling from me. I lean toward him, inhaling his scent like I could get high from it.
“You’re playing with fire,” I warn. “It’s going to burn when it consumes you.”
He stands on his toes, bringing his mouth to my ear. “I’m not scared of a little heat.” His hot breath sends shivers of want rippling through my body.
“You better walk away, Wonderland, or I won’t be held responsible for what I do to you in front of everyone. That’ll surely get back to your daddy.”
My words have their desired effect because he jerks away, glowering at me. I uncap the Coke and bring it to my lips, winking at him. He shoves his middle finger in my face before storming off. I’m grinning after him when Naomi sidles up beside me.
“Wow.”
I wipe the smile off my face and look down at her, eyebrows knitted together as I study the sassy girl who’s stuck by my side through some of my shittiest moments. “What?”
“Just weird seeing it confirmed.” She shrugs as though her words don’t stab me right in the gut.
“We were arguing,” I say lamely.
“No, Canyon, that’s not at all what you two were doing. You were eye-fucking and sharing a Coke like a couple.”
I balk at her words and shake my head. “That’s…Nae…”
“Come on,” she says, rolling her eyes at me. “Let’s get to class.”
Eye-fucking.
Sharing a Coke like a couple.
Here I thought I was taunting Alis because that’s what we do, but it turns out he’s mind fucking me just as much as I thought I was doing to him.
I’m so screwed.
“Yo,” Gage calls out from the bench on the football field.
I walk away from the group that’s stretching on the track and toward the guy I’ve had to begrudgingly put up with over the years since he’s in my circle of friends. “What’s up?”
He’s bigger than me with all his Blood Gators football gear on, a fact his smug self seems to appreciate. I walk right up to him, not daunted by the stupid show of intimidation. Gage and I have always tolerated each other because we were teammates who shared the same friends. I’ve never liked him the way I do Cain and Damon, though. Something about him irritates me. Always has.
“Coach will let you back on the team,” he says, eyeing me as though he can’t seem to understand why. “He thinks you’re going through a phase.”
