Piece of my heart, p.17
Piece of My Heart, page 17
“Can’t wait,” she murmured, leaning forward to kiss me.
* * *
The next twenty-four hours flew by. Time at home with my family always went by quickly, and leaving a day earlier made that feeling even worse. It was tempered by excitement, though.
We kept our plans to ourselves as we said our good-byes, but I felt Ani’s suspicious eyes on me more than once. She knew something was up, and she didn’t buy the story that I’d mistaken the day I was supposed to be back in Missouri. She kept her mouth shut, though.
“Are you coming home for Christmas?” she asked, hugging me good-bye.
“Not sure yet,” I replied, surprising her. I never missed Christmas.
“Oh,” she said finally in understanding. “I didn’t even think that you’d have to coordinate plans with your new lady.”
“I’m not sure if she wants to go home for the holidays,” I said with a small shrug, even though the idea of missing Christmas bummed me out.
“Ooh,” Ani said. “Maybe she’ll take you home to meet the family.”
“Maybe.” I glanced over at Sarai, who was saying good-bye to my parents. They both hugged her, and my dad said something in her ear that made her laugh.
“You did good,” Ani said, following my gaze. “I like her.”
“I knew you would.”
“No you didn’t,” she scoffed. “It could’ve gone either way.”
“Not true.”
“You have shit taste in women,” Ani said.
“I do not.” I looked at her in disbelief. “And I’ve never even brought any women to meet you.”
“Exactly,” she said, nodding. “Because you knew they were shitty.”
“That’s not—”
“Jesus,” Bram cut in, shaking his head as he stepped beside us. “You two are like twelve-year-olds.”
“No we’re not,” Ani and I both replied at the same time.
“Jinx, you owe me a Coke,” we both said at the same time again.
“I rest my case,” Bram muttered. He wrapped his arms around me and slapped me on the back a couple of times as we hugged. “Make sure you get some pictures,” he said quietly in my ear. “You know mom will want some.”
My mouth dropped open in surprise as I pulled away. “How did you know?”
“You’d never forget when you had to be back,” he said, his voice low as Ani made her way over to our parents. “Figured you were probably taking a detour.”
“Were you looking in my phone?” I asked suspiciously. There was no way that he’d put it all together himself.
Bram laughed and shook his head. “Nope. I just knew what you were up to as soon as you said you were leaving tonight instead of tomorrow.”
“Woo-woo twin shit?” I asked. It happened very rarely, but sometimes we just knew things about each other that made no sense. It wasn’t telepathy or anything like that; it was more of a feeling.
“Must be,” Bram said with a shrug.
“Not even sure if we’ll go through with it,” I said, guilt rising up in my chest. I had no idea how to explain to my brother that the thought of marrying Sarai in a quiet ceremony without the entire family watching and weighing in felt…right. I wanted it to be about me and her, not putting on a show for everyone else.
“Alex,” Bram said, stopping my apology. “Do what’s best for you guys, all right?”
“You’re the best brother a boy could have,” I replied, grinning.
“You’re a shithead, and if you try to hug me again, I’ll punch you.”
“Abraham,” I sang as I wrapped him up in a bear hug. “I love you, brother!”
“Knock it off,” he groused, laughing as he tried to push me away.
“I can’t,” I yelled. “I can’t contain it!”
“You damn well can,” he huffed, shoving at me while I clung to him. He was laughing so hard that barely any noise came out.
“Boys,” my mom called as we tussled, my hands grabbing hold of anything I could grip as Bram did his best to shove me away. “You’re going to fall and get all muddy.”
“I’m okay with that,” Bram called back, out of breath. “My house is five minutes away. Princess here can fly”—he paused for a split second—“home covered in mud.”
“You’re such an ass,” I said, laughing as I finally let him go.
Bram shot me a lopsided grin as he settled his coat back on his shoulders.
“We better go,” my dad said, giving my mom a kiss on the lips. “Or they’re gonna miss their flight.”
I jogged over to my mom and pulled her into a hug, spinning her gently in a circle before putting her on her feet again.
“Thanks for coming home, baby,” she said, smiling even though her eyes were watery. “Love getting to see you, even for a couple of days.”
“We’ll be back soon,” I promised, smiling back.
“Make sure of it,” she replied. She turned to Sarai. “It was so good to meet you, sweetheart.”
“You too,” Sarai said, smiling as my mom pulled her into a hug.
As soon as they’d separated, I laced my fingers with Sarai’s and tugged her toward the truck.
“Love you,” I called over my shoulder to my mom.
“Love you, too. Call me this week.”
“I will.”
We climbed into my dad’s truck, and I turned to smile at Sarai. “You ready?” I asked as my dad backed out of the driveway.
“Yes,” she murmured, grinning excitedly.
Chapter 12
SARAI
I swallowed painfully, smoothing down the front of my white sundress as I waited for the receptionist to start the music. After Alex and I had split up and found clothes to wear for the ceremony, it had been pretty easy to find a chapel. It was nothing fancy, and the small building had only a few people working, but they’d fallen all over themselves trying to make sure everything was perfect for us.
They’d stuffed a bouquet of fake flowers in my hand in the reception area and ushered Alex to the front of the chapel to wait for me, and the moment he was out of eyesight, my stomach twisted painfully with nerves. Was I doing the right thing? We hadn’t told anyone what we were doing. In theory it had seemed really romantic, but now that it was actually happening, it felt…sneaky. Like we were doing something wrong.
My aunt and uncle were going to lose it. I couldn’t imagine getting married any other way, but convincing them of that would be impossible.
“Are you ready?” the grinning receptionist asked me. At my nod, she started the music and gestured for me to move through the door to the chapel.
My heart was thumping heavy in my chest, and my feet felt like lead as I moved forward, but the second I saw Alex’s wide smile and the way he fidgeted, clearly nervous himself, I calmed down.
This was what I wanted.
When I reached Alex, he leaned down so our foreheads touched, and let out a shaky breath, his excitement palpable.
“Ready?” he whispered.
“Ready,” I whispered back.
As we turned to face the officiant, Alex’s hand found mine. We held hands through the entire ceremony.
* * *
I was married.
Married.
I stared down at my ring while Alex took his shower, and finally let the gravity of the situation sink in. I had a husband. I was a wife.
Any important decisions I made would forever have to be discussed with another person. I twisted the rings around my finger. I was going to have to share my space, change my schedules, and worry about someone else whenever I made plans.
Panic seeped in until I heard Alex singing happily in the shower.
I would always have someone to come home to, someone to share expenses with, someone who would kill spiders and change light bulbs. I’d never have to worry about putting an extra blanket on the bed, because sleeping with Alex was like sleeping with a space heater. I smiled to myself.
He also hogged the blankets.
“Well, wife,” Alex called out as he stepped from the shower and began to dry off. “Are you ready to head back to reality?”
I really wasn’t. Missouri was school and work and schedules and deadlines. It was calling my aunt and uncle and breaking the news that I’d gotten married when they hadn’t even known that I was engaged.
Growing up, I’d had my wedding planned out. I’d get married in a synagogue to a boy that my parents loved. My mom and aunt would help me get dressed, and my dad would walk me down the aisle. We’d have a big party afterward, and then my husband and I would go on some extravagant honeymoon that my parents had gifted us for our wedding. The details had always been vague, but the idea had been solid. It was how things were done in our community. Long engagements, fancy weddings, fabulous honeymoons.
Imagining any of that now made me want to scream. So I’d pretty much done the exact opposite. My aunt was going to lose her mind when she found out. I swallowed hard as I felt myself break out in a cold sweat. To say that I was dreading that conversation would be an understatement. Was there something worse than dread? Because the feeling in the pit of my stomach was definitely worse than that.
Aunt Adinah would be heartbroken if I told her how painful it was to even think about planning a wedding without my mother. That the thought of walking down the aisle by myself or with Uncle Isaac made me want to cry. She’d be understanding, and she’d never make me feel bad about it, but I knew it would hurt her. I was the only child she had, and I’d never want her to feel like she wasn’t enough. No, it was better this way. I would rather have her angry with me than sad.
“I am,” I said, standing up to slide my shoes on as he got dressed. “Are you ready to get back on a plane?” Our landing in Las Vegas had been bumpy, to say the least. The woman sitting next to us had said that it was pretty common when flying in and out of that airport. I’d thought Alex was going to vomit.
“Not looking forward to it,” he said with a humorless laugh. “But I’m ready to be home.”
“Missing work?” I asked, checking the room for anything we’d missed when we’d packed our things. We’d been there for less than twelve hours, but somehow the contents of our bags had exploded around the room.
“I’m just ready to be married, I guess,” he replied sheepishly. “You know, all the normal stuff. Getting you all moved in, coming home from work to see you on the couch with a frown on your face, going to see the Krakowskis, all of it.”
“Wait,” I said. “Why would I have a frown on my face?”
“Because you’re doing homework,” he replied easily.
“Oh.” That made sense. I was getting close to the end of school, and I definitely had what Hailey called “senioritis.” I was tired of the homework, tired of all the time I spent at the university, and tired of stressing about my grades. I was more than ready to graduate.
“It’s cute,” he said, coming up behind me as I bent to look under the bed.
I shot up like I’d been electrocuted when he lightly pinched my butt.
“I wish we had more time,” he murmured, fitting himself against my back.
“Me too,” I replied, letting my head drift back to rest against his shoulder as he rolled his hips.
“We should come back for our anniversary,” Alex said, kissing my neck before pulling away. “Go to some shows, gamble a little—you know, do Vegas right.”
“Sounds fun,” I replied, but my mind was already wandering back to the fact that I was married and no one knew it yet.
We left the hotel and got into a cab that took us to the airport. It was late November, but the sky was clear and bright as we wove in and out of traffic. Ironically, Alex didn’t seem at all nervous that our cab driver was a maniac, but he nearly lost the contents of his stomach when we hit a little turbulence on an airplane. I was the exact opposite. I hated riding with bad drivers, and the only saving grace of the whole ride was that it wasn’t raining.
By the time we got on our flight and settled into our seats, I’d calmed down and Alex was all wound up again.
“Almost home,” I said with a sigh, giving his knee a squeeze.
“So I was thinking,” he said, lacing his fingers with mine as we taxied down the runway. “We should mail some of our wedding photos to my parents.”
“No,” I replied, elbowing him.
“It would be hilarious,” he argued, his lips tipping up in a small smile as he grew more and more tense. “That’s how we could announce it.”
“Not even you could think that was funny,” I replied, staring at him in disbelief.
“Can you imagine the looks on their faces?”
“You mean your mom crying?” I asked dubiously. “I’d rather not.”
“She won’t cry.”
“She’s definitely going to cry,” I muttered. Everything had happened so quickly, and I’d been so caught up in the excitement that I hadn’t worried about how Alex’s mom was going to react. I’d known that my family would be angry about our marriage and how we’d gone about it, but I hadn’t given much thought to how Alex’s family would feel, because he’d been so supportive of the whole idea. Now I was really regretting not warning them.
“They’ll get over it,” Alex said, opening his eyes even though his skin was pale and we weren’t at cruising altitude yet. “Don’t worry—my sister will think it’s romantic, and she’ll convince everyone else.”
“Somehow, I can’t imagine your brother thinking that anything is romantic,” I replied.
“Bram already knew,” Alex said with a shrug.
“What?” I asked, my eyes widening. I’d thought that we’d agreed not to tell anyone yet.
“Wife,” Alex said softly, leaning down to catch my eye, “I didn’t tell him—he just knew.”
“How would he just know?” I asked suspiciously.
“Twin shit,” Alex replied. “Sometimes we just know things. He didn’t believe our story, and he put the pieces together.”
“Twin shit,” I muttered, leaning back in my seat.
“It doesn’t happen all the time, mostly just with big stuff,” Alex explained.
“And what did he say?” I asked, turning my head to look at him. “You know, about the elopement.”
“He said to do whatever is right for us,” Alex said, giving a little shrug. “My brother’s kind of an ass, but he’s a good guy under all of the bluster.”
“I liked him,” I confessed, laughing a little at Alex’s surprised look. “What? He’s interesting. He might be grumpy, but you can tell he loves you guys.”
“Yeah,” Alex said, grinning. “Me best.”
I laughed.
“No, but you could tell, right? That he loves me best?”
I shook my head in exasperation as Alex’s smile grew.
“He does,” Alex continued. “Everyone knows it.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “He just doesn’t let it show so he doesn’t make anyone else jealous.”
“Yeah,” I murmured back drily. “Ani was obviously in a distant second place.”
“This is why I love you,” Alex replied, putting an arm around my shoulder so he could tuck me against his side. “Because you see through all the bullshit into the heart of things.”
“You’re so full of crap,” I muttered, unable to keep the smile off my face.
“And that’s why you love me,” Alex replied.
* * *
The next week was a blur of school, work, and packing. Alex mentioned not telling our families about our marriage until we were all settled in, and I gladly took the reprieve. I struggled with how I was going to break the news to my aunt. My uncle was the calmer of the two, and I knew that even though he was going to be disappointed in how I’d gone about things, it was my aunt who was going to be the angriest. I wasn’t looking forward to that conversation at all, and the longer I waited, the more anxious about it I became.
By the next weekend, Alex and I were tripping and stubbing our toes against boxes, but all my things had been moved into his apartment across town. We were officially living together, and though I’d been nervous about it at first, I was thoroughly enjoying it when I woke up pressed against his bare back.
“Hey, roomie,” Alex mumbled, lifting my hand to kiss my fingertips. “Sleep good?”
“Yes,” I murmured against his back. The skin was smooth under my lips, and I kissed him there once, then twice. Yeah, I was enjoying married life very much.
“We need to call our families today,” Alex said, stretching his arms above his head. “Waiting a few days so we could get settled in is one thing, but waiting any longer makes it look like we were hiding it, don’t you think?”
“Yeah,” I replied, my voice coming out like a croak. “Yeah, you’re right.”
“Let’s do breakfast first, though,” he said, kissing me quickly before he hopped out of bed. “I’m starving.”
I watched his bare ass leave the room, then fell back against the pillows and stared at the ceiling. It was judgment day, the day I’d spent all week trying to ignore.
I forced myself out of bed and took a shower, barely noticing my surroundings as I rehearsed exactly how I was going to break the news to my family. No matter how I looked at it, I couldn’t imagine our conversation ending in anything but tears. I hoped, though, that Aunt Adinah would at least let me try to explain before she completely lost her composure.
“You hungry?” Alex asked, standing in front of the stove in nothing but a pair of sweatpants. “I’ll make you an omelet.”
The idea of food made my stomach roll, and I shook my head. “No thanks.” I’d been dealing with a nervous stomach all week, and this morning was no different.
“I wonder if you caught a bug on the plane or something,” Alex said, leaving the stove to come over and rest his palm against my forehead. “You don’t have a fever.”
“I’m okay,” I said, leaning against his chest.
For all my anxiety and worry, I didn’t regret getting married the way we had. I’d never imagined how comforting it would be to have a husband. It was as if the moment we’d signed our names on the paperwork, I’d suddenly had a person who would always be in my corner. It was a heady feeling, knowing that he wasn’t going anywhere, that this relationship was permanent no matter what. I was glad that we’d gotten to that point without all the unnecessary stress of a big wedding.
