Code name omega, p.21
Code Name: Omega, page 21
“What’s going on?” I demand, looking around the room.
Every member of my family—except Kat, who is smirking—looks at me with wide, unblinking eyes.
“What do you mean, honey?” my mom asks.
I gesture with a circling motion. “This. This small talk going on and acting like you’re okay with me living my life in Pennsylvania and not back here at the farm. Acting like you have pride in what I’m doing, when—”
“We do have pride in what you do,” my dad says, cutting me off.
“I know,” I exclaim, feeling a loss of control. “I mean, I get that you do. But you had more pride when I was here, showing horses and winning. When I wouldn’t get back in the ring, it broke everything. You were all relentless, trying to get me to do something I didn’t want to do anymore. All you ever did was try to get me to come back, and no one took me seriously that I was finished.”
I suck in a deep breath. That was a massive release getting that all off my chest.
“Honey,” my mom says, stepping toward me. “We tried to do what we always do—”
“No.” I cut her off with a raised hand, and my voice shrills. I’m afraid she’s going to say something that will prove I’ve been wrong about my family all along. I’m flooded with embarrassment that Kellen is watching this, knowing I’m probably going to send him scurrying now that I’ve dragged him into family drama. “I’m sorry… I can’t do this…”
I pivot away from the group with the intention of fleeing the house. I have no clue where I’ll go. Normally when I’m upset, I go to my horses.
I make it no more than two steps when my arm is caught, and I turn to see it’s Kellen. “Stay,” he says softly. “Talk this out.”
“But…”
I look around at my family, and they’re all staring at me, concern etched on their faces—not recrimination.
Not even Ethan, who tried to force me to return home when he came to Pennsylvania.
“Abby,” my dad says, moving toward me. Kellen’s gentle grip slides from my forearm to my hand. He squeezes it briefly and then steps away from me. I want to grab back onto him, a lifeline, but instead turn to face my father. His hands come to my shoulders. “After Molly’s accident, your confidence took a massive hit. And yes, we all tried to get you back on the proverbial horse. It’s what we do. We’re horse people, and we’ve all had our scary times—”
“You’ve not seen someone killed.” I look from him to my mom, and then back again. “You didn’t set into action a chain of events that caused someone’s death.”
“You didn’t cause that,” Ethan says, shifting beside my dad. “Lunar didn’t cause it. Molly did by coming up on you and Lunar did what scared horses do. It was a horrible fluke she got hung up on the stirrup.”
“Maybe so. But none of you could accept that I just couldn’t get past it. You all hounded me to get back in the ring, and—”
“We did what you would have done for any of us,” Wade says. “It’s the way we are. We work hard, we pick ourselves up, and we get back to it. If that was me afraid to get back in the ring, you would’ve been constantly on me.”
“Yeah, but—”
“No buts,” Trey says, stepping forward to add his two cents. “We pushed you, and yeah, we pushed you hard. We wanted you to get back into that ring because you were amazing at it, Abby. You have talent beyond anything any of us have ever seen, and we wanted to make the effort to get you back there.”
“But when you made your choice, we accepted it,” my mom adds. “We wanted you to come back home and practice here. If not Blackburn Farms, then at least in the area so we could all be together.”
“No,” I insist, shaking my head. “You wanted me to show again.”
“You’re wrong.” I jolt as I realize Kat’s speaking, and I turn to my twin. “I love you like no other, Thing One, but no one pushed you to get back in that ring once you made your final decision. If you felt that pressure, it was coming from you and not us. I’m guessing it was guilt, which you obviously still feel, that kept you away. But you want to blame us, and it’s not fair anymore.”
I cover my face with my hands, everything a jumble of facts and overactive imagination. Is it possible I read too much into their words and actions? Did I run to Pennsylvania because of my own guilt and put it on my family as my reason to stay away?
“Abby.” Kellen encircles my wrists and pulls my hands from my face. He looms in front of me with a reassuring smile. “I love you.”
“What?” I wheeze, the words knocking the breath out of me.
“You said it to me out in the hallway, and I didn’t get a chance to respond, but it seems like now is the perfect time.”
My eyes flit about the room, taking everyone in. They’re all smiling, likely swooning from Kellen’s words and from his commitment to be a part of this conversation.
“I love you, and you love me, right?” he asks, garnering my attention.
“Yes… right.” I feel like I’m having an out-of-body experience.
“Two people who love each other trust each other too.”
That right there makes things very clear. “Yes. I trust you implicitly.”
Kellen’s hands come to my face, and he peers down at me. It’s just me and him at this moment. “Then trust me when I tell you, I hear what your family is saying, and I don’t think there are any expectations you’re not meeting. More than anything, they miss you. They’re proud of you and the decisions you’ve made. And if I’m reading the room right, and I think I am, they admire and respect what you’ve done with your life.”
I’m so lost in his eyes, but his words wash over me with the sting of truth. It stings because I realize I’ve not been able to see this for myself. I’ve been so mired in my guilt.
Guilt over Molly’s death.
Guilt over the death of my show career.
Guilt over not being able to win one more championship with Lunar, which would have meant a lot to our family business.
And… guilt for not listening to what everyone was really trying to tell me.
I blow out a quavering breath, put my hands on his wrists, and draw him to me for a soft kiss. “I love you. Thank you for being real with me.”
“Anytime,” he replies and then presses his lips to my forehead.
Releasing him, I turn to my parents. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t,” my dad says and pulls me into his side. My mom’s arms come around me, and next thing I know, lots of arms are around me. I look up through the throng of siblings and parents, and my eyes lock with Kellen’s.
He grins and looks satisfied with himself. He solved the estrangement in our family, just by being my rock. And I hope he trusts that this reunion will not lead me away from Pennsylvania. I’m staying wherever he is, and if he leaves Pennsylvania for some reason, I’ll follow.
But as I snuggle into my family, I vow I will come back and visit Blackburn Farms often.
EPILOGUE
Kellen
A lot has happened in the last seven months. Hellman took a plea deal, giving up the names of those higher up in the sex trafficking syndicate, and was sentenced to six years.
I hired an attorney to deal with Adriana, and we finally ironed out the paperwork. She paid me for my initial investment in the business and is now completely gone from my life.
With a lot of hard work, Abby secured medical treatment for every single dog from Hellman’s kennel operation and helped coordinate successful adoptions for each dog. This included us bringing home one more puppy that she simply fell in love with. Abby named him Spud, and he and Roscoe are as thick as thieves. They’re also rotten and mischievous and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Princess and Bubba, though, still rule the roost.
Speaking of roosts… Abby has moved into my place. More room and all. She’s now full owner of the veterinary clinic and has hired one other vet to help with the ever-growing practice. She’s been featured in a lot of news stories as the angel who rescued all the mill dogs, so business is booming. The barn has been rebuilt, and Abby paid for it since arson was the determining cause and insurance wouldn’t cover.
Ethan fronted her the money as a loan against her trust, but with an initial funding of five million upon her birth, the barn repair won’t set her back.
Not that the money matters. Abby is content exactly where we are, doing exactly what we do. I’m more in love with my job at Jameson than ever, and I think it’s safe to say that we’re settled in to stay. Best of all, Abby repaired the relationship with her family, and we’ve been back to visit a few times.
Our current visit is particularly special because Abby is doing something no one thought she’d ever do again.
She’s back in the show ring.
We’re at the Shelby County Fairgrounds for the start of the show season, and Abby is riding one of Blackburn Farms’ horses. I’m not even sure how it came about, but one day as she was riding Lunar and I was watching—because I’ve decided I’m better at watching than riding those huge things—she announced that she wanted to show again.
Not with Lunar, of course. He’s an old, retired boy these days.
But she started training at a local barn with their horses, and she did it with such determination and grit, I don’t know that I’ve ever loved anyone more. I’m so fucking proud of her because although she’s fiercely confident in her skills, she’s still nervous, and this is making her confront her fears.
“How are you not a ball of nerves?” my mom asks. She and my dad met us in Kentucky to watch Abby’s return to the show ring.
“Because Abby’s got this,” I say. Truthfully, though, I’m a little anxious. I’ve watched enough of her rides over the past several months, including her training, to know that dangers lurk all the time with these animals. Saddlebreds are spirited and sometimes spook easily. I’ve not seen Abby take a fall, but I’ve seen her stick to her saddle when a horse has gotten wily. It’s one reason I’ve declined her invitation to ride them.
Frankly, I find them a little crazy.
My dad consults the class sheet he’s holding and has been ticking off with a pen. “Abby’s up next.”
None of Abby’s siblings are in the stands with us. They’re at the facility barns where all the competing horses are kept. Competitions stretch over three days, and the Blackburn clan will all be helping Abby prepare. Trey and Kat will also be showing, but their classes aren’t until tomorrow.
The speakers crackle and music starts. The announcer’s voice echoes throughout the indoor arena, “Let’s welcome the riders for Five-Gaited Pleasure division. There will be seven riders in this class.”
The gate at the far end swings open, and horses come in at a trot. The outfits the riders wear are elaborate, bespoke, and expensive as I’ve come to learn. Abby’s is the third horse in, a six-year-old gelding the color of midnight from Blackburn Farms. He’s stunning with an arched neck, long, pluming tail, and an incredibly high step.
He doesn’t hold a candle to Abby, though, and my heart swells with pride as she directs the horse around the arena. She’s wearing a pair of dark navy jods, a mint green coat with tails and a silver vest underneath. Her Windsor-knotted tie is a deep plum, and her derby matches the color of her jods. Her boots are shiny black patent leather, and she carries a whip with a silver emblem on the end of the cherry-wood handle, engraved with her initials.
A present from me.
A large crowd is here from Blackburn, as they have several riders showing, and there’s a lot of hooting and hollering for Abby. We’re sitting in the front row, and I yell at her as she rides by. “Go, baby, go!”
She doesn’t look at me, but she smiles, and it’s full of confidence and joy. She may have been nervous before getting out there, but that woman is in her element.
“Riders,” the announcer says, “put your horses in a canter. Canter, please.”
I’ve learned a lot about these horses and how they train, and I know Abby at this moment is issuing a simple one-word command to her horse, along with a pull on the left rein and a slight pressure with her left leg, to put him into the proper gait.
Glancing down near the gate, I see Abby’s family standing there. Mom, Dad, three brothers, and Kat. They look like they’re about to burst from pride.
Abby maneuvers her horse like she was born to do this, and in a way, I suppose she was. I know I’m biased, but she’s the best out there, and when they call the riders into the lineup and she’s awarded the blue ribbon, I’m out of my seat and cheering the loudest.
Abby takes a victory lap, winking at me as she trots by.
My parents and I exit the stands and head over to the stables where the Blackburn horses are. Wade is leading Abby there as we approach, and she’s talking to her dad as the entire family walks beside her and her horse. She sees me and grins, and I give her a thumbs-up.
A photographer appears, and Abby poses on top of her horse, the blue ribbon clipped to the side of her jacket at her hip. Her family crowds in for more photos.
Then Thomas Blackburn motions me over, and more pictures.
Finally, Thomas shoos everyone away, and it’s just the two of us.
With pictures done, Abby swings her leg over the saddle and hops to the ground. She doesn’t need my support, but my hands go to her hips to steady her landing.
When she turns into me, I don’t hesitate.
I go down on one knee as Wade moves the horse out of the way. This was all planned, of course. Her family and my parents crowd in to watch, and Abby’s eyes double, she’s so shocked.
Holding out a black velvet box, I gaze up at her. She looks around wildly, taking in that everyone seems to know what’s going on but her.
“Abby,” I say to get her attention. “Eyes on me.”
She covers her mouth with her hand, but she can’t hide her huge smile. “Oh my God,” she breathes out. “What are you doing?”
“Proposing.” Simple answer to a simple question. I open the box and show her the ring. “I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time, but I knew this show was coming up and it would be more special to have your family involved. Mine, too, for that matter.”
Abby looks toward my parents and moves her hand to her heart to indicate that it is, indeed, special.
I pluck the ring from the box but don’t dare slide it on her finger just yet. “Abby… I think I fell a little in love with you the day we met. Seeing how passionate you were about saving dogs and standing up to Hellman. You were dazzling then, just as you are now. I’m so damn lucky to have met you, I’m blessed that you love me, and you will make all my dreams come true if you agree to be my wife. I want you by my side always. I want to build a family with you. And I want to devote my life to making you happy. Say you’ll be mine. Tell me to put this ring on your finger, and let’s start our forever together.”
I barely get the words out before Abby’s nodding her head and shoving her shaking hand in front of me. Laughing, I slip on the diamond ring, and it’s a perfect fit, thanks to Kat’s help.
Abby throws her arms around me, and I swing her in a wide arc. We’re both laughing and kissing and then everyone’s crowding around. The women pull her off to look at her ring, and the brothers and her dad surround me to issue warnings about taking care of her and if I don’t, they’ll kill me and bury me in the back pasture.
All in good fun, but it’s not long before Abby is making her way to me.
She embraces my shoulders and hops into my arms, legs around my waist. Abby gives me a deliciously long kiss, which makes me want to cart her off to an empty stall.
When she lifts her mouth, her eyes shine with emotion. She presses her forehead to mine. “I love you so much, Kellen. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I’m never going to take you for granted as long as I live.”
“I’m the lucky one,” I assure her. “Doing life with you is going to be my greatest accomplishment.”
“It will be my greatest honor,” she counters.
“My greatest joy,” I say with a grin.
“My greatest endeavor.”
I laugh and kiss her again. “How about we just agree it’s going to be the greatest thing either of us will ever do?”
Abby’s eyes sparkle, and my chest aches from her devotion. “I can get on board with that,” she says.
Yeah… I can get on board with that too.
The Blackburn Farms series is coming in 2024! The Blackburn family is practically royalty in the rolling hills of Kentucky, but every family has their own drama to handle. Join the Blackburn siblings—Kat, Ethan, Trey, and Wade (with appearances from Abby and Kellen too!)—along with their parents and staff at Blackburn Farms, as they navigate life, love, loss, and getting back on the horse in this contemporary romance series, coming Spring 2024. If you’d like to receive updates for the series reveals, covers, preorders, etc., sign up here ——> https://bit.ly/SB_BlackburnLaunch
Baden Oulett is ready for a fresh start! Stronger than he’s been in months, Baden is ready to take on the next chapter when he accepts a position as the goalie coach for the Pittsburgh Titans. CLICK HERE for details about Baden and the Pittsburgh Titans series!
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About the Author
New York Times, USA Today, and Wall Street Journal Bestselling author Sawyer Bennett uses real life experience to create relatable stories that appeal to a wide array of readers. From contemporary romance, fantasy romance, and both women’s and general fiction, Sawyer writes something for just about everyone.
A former trial lawyer from North Carolina, when she is not bringing fiction to life, Sawyer is a chauffeur, stylist, chef, maid, and personal assistant to her very adorable daughter, as well as full-time servant to her wonderfully naughty dogs.
