Absolutely unforgivable, p.22
Absolutely Unforgivable, page 22
Things between Billy and me were great. Our love was new and exciting and the more we were swept up in each other's bliss, the more our fans seemed to follow along and revel in it as well.
I guess to some it might seem strange how we lived our lives in the public eye, tweeting pictures of us having breakfast together or shots of him throwing me in the pool, something he enjoyed all too much. There really was no part of our life that was off limits, at least not in the minds of Brick and Trista.
They captured and broadcast every tender moment that they could. Minus that, to me our lives were perfect. I don’t think that I had ever been as happy in my life. I was definitely in the love bubble, completely unaware of anything else going on around me. I was happy. Billy was happy. We were together and that was all that mattered to me.
I even somehow found a way to ignore all the girls that would fall over themselves just to get a look at Billy while he was onstage and the swarms of girls that tried to touch him when he wasn’t.
Chapter 15 - Good Morning Houston
The day of our big television appearance had finally arrived. The only problem was we had to be up really early as it was a live show and it started at 6 am. We weren’t scheduled to be on until 8 am, but still they wanted us there early for preparations.
The host of the Good Morning Houston show was a sweet lady that came into the green room to give us a welcome. When she did she took one look at Billy and let out of soft, “Oh my.” All the girls giggled. It was something by now we had seen and heard a million times. Billy was drop dead gorgeous, even at this time of the morning.
It was so early and nobody was really awake yet, so for the most part the gang was pretty subdued, barely paying attention to the production assistant who came in after the show’s host to give us some instructions while Trista was frantically pouring cups of coffee down the boys’ throats trying to make sure they would be awake enough when it came time for them to go before the cameras.
Unlike the men, the girls had been up for quite a bit longer. We had wardrobe to get into as well as hair and makeup. Brick had wanted us to really slut it up for the cameras but luckily Trista agreed with me in the wardrobe department and had styled all the girls in matching white and gold dresses. They were sexy, but classy. Well, all but Starla and Darla’s. For some reason they decided to forgo the elegant outfits and instead wear matching very low-cut white dresses that had shiny golden belts. When Trista asked them about the change they just went on about how the bigger belts would sparkle better for the cameras in the overhead lights. That, of course, wasn’t what Trista meant. The dresses were rather provocative for morning television and we all worried they would make them change or prevent us from getting to go on altogether.
Bree, Mindy, and Tiffany had similar looking Greek-goddess-like dresses that fell to the floor but had a split up the entire length of the gown exposing their legs. Tiffany was going to go onstage with us today. While she normally preferred to stay near Patrick while we were performing, with Trista’s encouragement, today she would be front and center with the rest of us. And by “encouragement” I mean Trista’s incessant whining.
For me, I had figured that since I was going to be placed front and center of the stage next to Billy they would find some outrageous costume to put me in and I wasn’t wrong. Mindy had found the dress in a magazine and had shown it to Trista. Together they worked with a local seamstress who handmade a similar copy for me. The dress was made into sections. The main part was a tight, flesh colored mini skirt that had delicate gold embroidered design around my chest to cover my breasts but just barely. Just in case anything happened or my dress moved in some way I hadn’t foreseen, I covered my nipples with a bronze sparkle eye shadow. Better to be safe than sorry.
Starting at about my hips the back of the dress went on to flow to the floor. It wasn’t really a separate piece, it all flowed seamlessly together, but to me it felt like different pieces since the front of the dress was so tight and short. Nobody else could tell from just looking at me, but I could feel the little pins that were attaching the train. On my feet I wore a brand new pair of gold sequin, platform heels that Trista had bought for me to match the dress. I loved them and marveled at how they sparkled in the lights as I nervously paced the floor waiting for them to call us on to the stage.
I tried to keep my focus on my shiny new shoes as we were shuffled off down a long hallway, headed towards the stage. Like the real pros the boys were, when it came time for them to head out they perked up and turned it on. You could actually see the transformation take place in their body language. It was fascinating to watch them go into rock star mode.
We strutted out to the stage where the equipment had been set up for us and the lights overhead were turned on. It took me a moment to adjust my eyes to their brightness. Trista was clapping her hands and saying “Places, ladies. Come on, we are about to go live.”
She stepped into the background standing behind the cameras and a man started to count down, “Ten, nine, eight, seven, six …” and then he said nothing. Instead he lifted his hand in front of him holding up five fingers, then four, then three, then two and then a bright red light on top of the camera came on.
Darla and Starla were perfectly positioned as always on each of Travis’ arms. Tiffany, Mindy, and Bree stood near Zander, and I was placed up front with Billy, only off to the side more. Billy took center stage and rightfully so. He looked so sexy in his faded blue jeans that hung a little low on his waist and showed just the top of his white Calvin Klein underwear underneath when he put his hands in his front pocket. He had on the band’s black t-shirt that fit him tightly and showed off every bit of the well-toned chest underneath.
The second the red light came on above the main camera in front of us, the band started playing. In all of the excitement I had forgotten to find out what song they had decided on. It was an upbeat song that had a solid rock beat to it. It was one of their originals and the lyrics mentioned something about his favorite memory. I had heard Billy singing it before in the bathroom in the mornings.
It didn’t really matter what song they played, us girls pretty much always had the same role; we were arm candy for the band. Sure I may have had a tambourine in my hand but I knew the real reason I was on stage with the other girls. We made the boys look good and that is all that Trista cared about, the image of her little rock gods in the making.
After the song was over, Billy and I were led over to sit next to the host of the show while she asked us several questions. While we were heading over to that part of the stage I heard her say, “Everyone give it up for our special guests Billy Snow, Stacy Keller, and the rest of Jessie’s Girl who performed their new song Favorite Memory.”
As we sat down she started in right away with her questions. They were your typical interview questions like how did you meet, did it bother me that all the girls were screaming for Billy throughout every performance, and so on. She talked to Billy a bit about how the band got together and what the name meant.
I turned my head to look at him, wondering what story he was going to tell her live early morning TV. I held my breath as he grinned and told her the story about how the name served as a reminder that women may come and go but friendship lasts forever. He shrugged. “It just reminds us that friendship is more important than some fling.”
I finally relaxed, grateful he didn’t add the typical “and no bitch is worth all that shit” to the story, which he had done so many times in the past. I squeezed Billy’s hand but when he didn’t squeeze it back I looked his way again. He was looking down at the ground.
The host turned to me next. “So tell me, Stacy, what was it like to suddenly wake up one day and be famous?”
“It was exactly like that,” I said enthusiastically. “I woke up one day and I had Trista, the band’s manager, telling me about all these Twitter followers and how many views our videos had on YouTube. I couldn’t believe it.”
I turned my head towards Trista who was standing behind the camera with Brick. He was slowly shaking his head, mouthing “no”. I think he was a little bit panicked that I would reveal he had been tweeting as me. But I knew better than to do that.
“The great thing about Twitter is that you don’t really feel like you are sending out a message to thousands and thousands of followers. It’s just like you are talking to a few friends, like I was saying, hey Mindy this is what I’m wearing tonight, what do you think about it? But in reality that message would go out to everyone. It’s still hard to wrap my head around the fact that I now have over 200,000 followers. It doesn’t even seem possible.”
I paused for a moment and continued. “It’s strange, really, if you think about it. I can’t sing. I don’t even know how to play a real instrument, all I really am is ambiance, Billy’s arm candy. Heck, even our sound guy Patrick can play the keyboard and his girlfriend Tiffany can play the piano. If you ever heard her play it would make you cry it’s so beautiful.”
“Now that’s not true. A little birdie told me that you and Billy have a song that you sing with him. Tell us about that.”
I knew immediately who that little birdie was and she was standing behind the camera right now next to Brick in her navy blue pencil skirt and spiked heels.
I blushed as I told the host of the show the story of our love song. “I’m so embarrassed. I didn’t think anyone knew about that. It’s not really a song that the band plays. It’s just something Billy and I played around with when we are at home alone.”
The host nodded her head and softly said, “Uh huh,” as if she wanted me to go on.
“I had heard a song before playing on the radio and immediately fell in love with it. Billy said that we could do one better so we sat down and wrote our own love song.”
There was some shuffling behind me and as I turned my head Tiffany was sitting behind a piano that had now appeared on the stage where Billy and I once stood. Turning back to Billy, I saw him getting up to grab his guitar.
The host asked, “What are we going to have to do to get you to sing it for us?”
“No, no, no.” I shook my head furiously. “I couldn’t. Oh my goodness no”.
I looked up at Billy as he was now putting the guitar strap over his shoulder. “No please,” I muttered softly as I looked into his eyes. He didn’t actually say the words but mouthed, “For me?”
In the background I could hear Tiffany start to play the first few notes of the song. Billy leaned against the arm of the loveseat with his acoustic guitar in hand, where I sat looking up at him with my hand on his knee.
“Your heartbeat helps me sleep at night and your kiss warms my soul.”
This time Billy didn't look to the camera as he performed. He never took his eyes off of me and I never stopped looking at him. I’m pretty sure he did it because he knew if he didn’t keep me focused on him I would have bolted off of that stage so fast their heads would have been spinning.
He strummed the chords on his guitar and continued to sing the romantic sweet words of the song we had written together. As he sang the words, “My arms feel empty when you aren’t in them. My love for you grows every day. My heart aches for you in each and every way,” a single tear fell down my cheek.
At the last line of the song he stood up and so did I. He pushed his guitar to the side and pulled me into him and I looked up at him as together we sang, “I love you more than I ever knew I could love someone. I love you more with every kiss. I love you more than I ever knew I could. Your love is true bliss.”
As the song ended a loud man shouted, “And we’re clear.” The staff quickly shuffled us off as they set up for the next segment of the show.
Walking down the long hallway back towards the green room Travis said, “Holy fucking shit. That was unreal. We are going to be so fucking famous after that shit.”
I turned my head towards him and smiled. “Yeah, Travis, you guys were amazing today. You killed it onstage. I’m so proud of you guys. We are going to have to beat the girls off of you now with big sticks.”
Trista came up behind me, locking her arm in mine. “Hon, I don’t think that’s what he meant.”
I stopped walking for a moment and looked at her, waiting for her to fill me in on what she was talking about but she didn’t bother. She just tugged my arm and said, “Come on, you have some autographs to sign.”
Vin stood at the back door of the studio shaking his head. “It’s a madhouse out there, man. No way are we getting out of here without getting mobbed.”
“Well, let’s get the fuck on it,” Travis joked as he pushed his way out the door, Darla and Starla hanging on each arm. The fans screamed his name and he signed several autographs while Darla and Starla threw out our new posters to several of the hysterical girls.
Zander and Bree went out next, quickly followed by Mindy and Bran, all pausing to sign autographs as they made their way to the waiting stretched out Hummer limousine.
Patrick and Tiffany walked out next, alongside Brick and Trista. They jumped into the back and then it was just me and Billy, well, and Vin, my trusty bodyguard who I knew would never leave my side, especially with a mob of screaming fans just feet away. Devin and Rocco were already waiting by the car with their hands on the doorknob to quickly open it for us when we got close enough. When we didn’t come out right away, they started walking towards Vin to help him out.
I held my breath and looked into Billy’s eyes. He still stopped my heart with his perfection. We took a single step out the door and the screams and shouts began. Hastily I began to pick my way through the sea of women that stood between us and the door to the limousine. Vin, Devin, and Rocco did what they could to clear a path for us but it wasn’t easy. Women were grabbing at Billy, ripping his shirt off as he tried to walk by them. We stopped for a moment to sign a few autographs but things were getting out of hand and Vin wanted us to get out of there.
As more hands reached out to grab at us, Billy came up behind me, grabbing my waist and leaning in on me, covering my body with his, and acting as a shield while Vin got the door opened and shuffled us inside. Vin, Rocco, and Devin followed behind and then we were off.
The mood on the ride home was electric. Everyone was so revved up from all that had taken place that morning. At that moment I really thought everything was truly perfect in my life. I however, was wrong. Oh so horribly wrong.
When we pulled into Billy’s driveway, Jeromy was there leaning against his car waiting for us. “Hey man! Long time no see,” Vin said as he jumped out of the limo and put one hand on Jeromy’s back and then shook his hand with the other. Jeromy shook it back but didn’t take his eye off of the limousine. He waited for me and Billy to step out before he started towards us.
“I saw you on Good Morning Houston. I no longer have to wonder why you haven’t been calling me back. I completely get it now. How could I have been so blind? It all makes sense now.”
He turned to Billy, who had grabbed his arm trying to pull him away from me to get him to calm down. Jeromy jerked away from him. “I fucking trusted you, man. How could you?”
“Excuse me? You cheated on me, Jeromy. I never touched Billy until after we broke up. A breakup, might I remind you that was due to your infidelity! How dare you come in here acting all high and mighty. I loved you with every fiber of my being. You broke me. I was devastated by what you did, so don’t play victim with me.”
I started to walk away when Jeromy said, “I never cheated on you, Stacy.”
I quickly turned around. I was shaking as he said those words. How dare he deny what he had done? I had seen the two of them together with my own eyes. I screamed, “Bullshit!”
But Billy, who was standing next to me, now said something that would shake me to my very core. “No, Stacy. He didn’t cheat on you.”
I turned to face Billy, unsure if I really heard him say what I thought he did. Billy looked down to the ground and said “I found out last night.”
I turned towards Jeromy, who said, “You never gave me a chance to explain.”
I turned towards Mindy and she just shrugged. Bran and Zander were just looking at the ground, trying to avoid eye contact.
My heart was beating fast. My head was spinning. I was having a hard time catching my breath. I couldn’t understand any of this. I could hear Jeromy talking to me but still I couldn’t get what Billy said out of my head. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
I only found out last night, and everyone was rushing around this morning trying to get ready for the show. I just didn’t think it was the right time. I didn’t want you to freak out before we went live on the air.
“I can’t believe you Billy. How could you?”
“It wasn’t like that Stacy. I’m sorry. I should have told you as soon as I found out. I made a bad judgment call.”
My whole world was crashing down around me. I had a hard time thinking straight. I just wanted to get away and go somewhere I could be alone to think and sort it out.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see my car. I ran and jumped inside, quickly locking the doors behind me. Vin wasn’t too far behind me and positioned his massive body in front of my car blocking my departure. I was angry and I wasn’t going to let him or anyone else stop me from leaving. I rolled the window down. “Get out of my way, Vincent, or I will run over you. I’m not joking.”
