Counting the seconds, p.6
Counting the Seconds, page 6
- Zane
-—
Anna here…
I think I've made a mistake.
Zane says I should write it, if only to calm myself down so that we can plan our next steps.
I killed Jaeger.
I mean, it wasn't intentional but I was just so done with it all, and I lashed out.
Or maybe it was intentional, especially as I hid the sharp end of the wood, I used to kill him underneath his pillow next to his gun.
He emptied the room of all the other girls except me.
He had spent the last couple months before Zane, taking me whenever he felt like it.
It was always rough, it always hurt, I always bled.
I thought... maybe if I stopped fighting, maybe if I initiated it, it would be easy.
Maybe it is what he wanted.
Because that's why he emptied the room.
He said it was because he respected me.
I'm fucking crying and laughing. What an absurd fucked up thing to say.
He laid on the bed and I sat on him, staring into his eyes.
And I just lost it.
I got him in the neck before he could scream. And I continued till the tears blurred my vision.
I don't know what to do.
My hands can't stop shaking. Everyone thinks he's still sleeping. I hid him under his covers and told his men that I tired him out. And they bought the stupid lie. But they will figure it out soon enough.
And then I'll be dead.
Maybe that would be a better choice.
- Anna
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Day 221
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The last few days have been so unreal that if my life's story ever becomes a movie, this will be the section where the whole fucking cinema walks out on how untrue it is.
Kinda like the whole "inspired by true events" tagline that precedes horror movies where some of the sequences are as described with exaggerated bits thrown in for extra spicy fucking tension.
It's a shitty story, with shitty characters (myself included) and a questionable plot at this point.
Pardon my rambling.
I'm stressed.
I'm tired, I'm hungry and I'm just stressed.
Figured I'd put something down in the journal as a placeholder for my thoughts. They have been so jumbled up in the last few days that I'll probably forget something in the process of re-telling.
But whatever, right?
No one is going to see this fucking journal anyway.
At this point, I'm probably just writing for writing's sake.
Maybe... Maybe this is the reason why I'm still sane.
I'm going to try and sleep. Maybe I'm better tomorrow. If I'm not reliable enough, maybe Anna can say some stuff.
- Zane
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Day 222
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Right then…
Where to begin?
Anna's story, I couldn't confirm it because it's not like they let just about anyone see Jaeger to begin with. People were largely never allowed near the house he was in except for his loyalists, who only really entered when they got called to. So, I couldn't see for myself. Maybe I would have had a different plan.
Nonetheless, that doesn't matter.
She said she killed Jaeger, and I believe her. It still didn't give us answer for what to do with him being dead.
I had two choices in my head then.
We disperse the news to all the disgruntled workers who want a chance to escape. Maybe galvanize into some sort of fighting force though the reality of our chances would be slim at the utmost chance. I didn't know everyone working here and the few I knew were a tad worrisome to say the least.
Either that or we shift the blame expertly to Jaeger as some sort of self-sacrifice gone wrong. This was Mr shitGenius' idea. And to be honest, as cockamamie as it sounded, this was the choice we ended up going for.
Anna said he usually never slept too deeply or for too long. So, we had maybe an hour at most.
shitGenius argued that with the cult aspect of the camp and the 'chosen ones' belief sweeping through his followers, we would need to just concoct a strong enough excuse but nothing too heavy. It meant putting Anna in direct danger as I wouldn't be able to do anything about it.
Obviously, I argued against it. I mean, she's been through a shitty situation. I couldn't let her face it alone.
- Zane
---
'Mr' shitGenius69 at your service, future people, corporations and media agencies.
I have to say, when I found out about the journal, I didn't think it was anything too extensive. But this looks like a good body of work. I'll go through it later.
I'm going to explain my arguments real quick before lover-boy Zane misconstrues what I said and paint it like I'm a nut-job. I mean, I could be a nut-job but aren't we all these days?
See, I've been here longer than Zane and Anne? Anna... Anna…
She says she was with Jaeger before me but that's semantics really.
Jaeger has his followers resting on his every word, partly because they are psychotic enough to believe whatever the charlatan of a man said, or fear of repercussion of which I wouldn't blame them. The dude is a giant, fear is common sense. Either way, they obeyed, keyed in and followed whatever he told them was an order from God, as the leader of the chosen.
So, my advice to Anna was; get back into the room and beautify the scene a bit more. I figure she can use his blood to draw random symbols on the walls and the floor and whatever to sell the scene. She had to do it before anyone entered the room. And then for her alibi, she needed to pretend she was sent on an errand to procure some resources. For the act, she can pull two or more of the other slave-women that Jaeger had.
This way, only the keenest of eyes can figure out what had gone on.
I mean, I didn't say it was going to work 100% but it was a better plan than staging a revolution with disorganized and uninterested members. This whole cult slave life was the shittiest but I didn't plan to die for a half-plan of escaping.
- shitGenius69
—-
I have the book back. Still can't believe he wrote into it.
Still…
What he said is what Anna ended up doing, despite my incessant and numerous harshly whispered protests. She listened to the shit genius as opposed to me.
At this point, it's not important.
We're not at the camp anymore for starters. Might as well get that shocker out of the way. We're not in Texas anymore. And by 'We', I mean... about a sizable group of 15, plus or minus. Once news of their boss' death was spread, the loyalist began fighting over who got to lead the camp after. I opted to sneak out in the confusion and subsequent fighting.
My plan was to leave and just start running in one direction till I was far away from the camp. At that point, I was very open to stealing the first bicycle I could find and continue cycling till my muscles seized up. Lucky for me, someone managed to snag the keys to one of the vans in the camp.
I don't know where we're headed and honestly, I don't think I care so much.
As long as it's not back to camp, and as long as it is not some any new cult camp, I think I'll be fine for the time-being.
- Zane
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Day 223
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We've stopped for a break.
Not sure where, don't care... but Dunkin' Donuts is always a steal.
You know, I was thinking about Jaeger and Anna... I feel that would be the 'movie' of this whole sequence. When time resumes, whenever the fuck that is, Anna would give an interview, journalists would disturb me and shit genius would go on the Internet and spin heroic conspiracies. Out of us three, Anna has more to milk out of it. The interview will move hearts and there'll be a director or producer or studio even who'd look at her and nod at the money potential in her story.
After all, wouldn't it be…
Inspired by true events?
- Zane
-
“Every moment of your life is a second chance.”
- Rick Price
"Theatre Show!"
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Day 226
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We're back in Washington.
After all, it's the one place we actually decided to settle down in, except now we return with numbers. Apart from Anna, shitGenius69 and I, there's also Mark, Sally, Karen, Trey, Alan, Bill, Mike, Casey, Tolu, Agnes, Ricardo and Pico. I'm unsure of their last names and I don't really think it makes a difference.
At this point, we all just want to see an end to whatever it is that this... is.
Mark is a grizzly guy, largely quiet. Sally is a short woman, with deep Auburn hair. Karen is around Anna's age, if I'm to guess. Dark-haired and sharp eyes. Casey is the perfect blonde, blue eyes and all. I mean, her hair's a tad wispy but I blame that on cult camp.
Trey's a black guy, slim and probably the tallest in our group. He mentioned in passing that he got caught trying to run away from them.
Alan is a bald short man with an angry face. He mutters a lot and I recall seeing him bashing one of the loyalists in the face till the man laid still. No one really talks to him.
Bill is an older, white-haired guy with a kind smile. He's cool to talk to. Mike's a dark-haired, sleazy looking fellow. Ricardo and Pico talk to themselves a lot and it's hard to tell them apart, with the hoodie they constantly wear.
Agnes is an elderly woman, but not too old, I think. She looks spry. Tolu is a Nigerian, I believe. He's usually muttering to himself too but it always sounds fearful and I'm sure it's not in English.
I feel like we've probably all changed through the days and events of the time-stop. I feel like most of us, with the exception of Casey, probably had a different look at the beginning.
To all the stiffs, waiting to be unfrozen, we're probably time travellers as it is.
You know... question for the peeps who will end up reading this someday…
Is there going to be an effect on the stiffs? Not the dead ones, I mean... they are extremely unlucky and honestly, thinking about it is dark. To be frozen one moment, unaware of what's going on and then to wake up crippled or worse yet, not wake up.
So, fucking sad.
And this is the work of some random cult leader. I reckon there are others out there doing the same shit or worse. Then again, what could be worse?
In any case, we ended up in the same hall as Anna and I chose before, and we're restocking up on food again. I feel like she probably directed them to where we were.
Might as well do it for real this time, right?
- Zane
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Day 228
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shitGenius has left.
He said he's going to go visit a NASA branch somewhere in the state. Something about looking for the theoretical meteorite about to destroy the world.
Cue laugh track.
Anna is the de-facto leader of our ragtag bunch. The choice was given to me, but I don't want it. I barely want to even stay in one place.
Kinda hard to admit, but life was simpler and easier to work with when I moved from place to place... Time stop or no.
- Zane
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Day 235
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It has been remarkably peaceful, these last couple days.
But from the daily grumble I hear from the rest, it has been frustrating for them, due to the lack of things to do. They say that life was somewhat monotonous at the camp, but at the very least, they were kept busy and their minds weren't atrophying as a result of misuse.
Of course, it's the wrong mentality to have but they had it all the same. Slave mentality, perhaps, I don't know. These issues allude me sometimes.
Anna has tried to keep them busy, advising on hobbies they could take up.
The ladies have taken to knitting. The fellas are going through the motions but they've managed rig up a small old TV to work, with retro consoles, I think. It only works some of the time, on account of how many of us are in close proximity.
So that didn't last either.
Still, we're here. The real 'chosen' of the lot.
I've been doing more reading. I think it's now my new pastime.
I've gone through entire series, and even slogged through Twilight and 50 Shades of Grey. Not a fan, but it's not like there's much to do besides. Anna, Karen, Ricardo and Casey loved it though, so that's saying something.
Moving on, they are trying to hide it but it's not particularly difficult to see that there’s some romance building up in here.
Karen and Casey have been sneaking kisses here and there, mostly behind the confectionery stands. The two ladies think it's not really clear but the giggles, lipstick and indiscriminate time they spend together starts to add up really quick when you consider that we don't particularly do much to begin with.
Plus, there was that one time I happened to cross their paths and they were startled before Karen began some lecture on what she was trying to teach Casey. That was hilarious.
Mark's trying to get with Anna but that's a crapshoot. I mean, he's done the whole flowers and chocolate thing but it didn't even budge her in the slightest.
I'm rooting for him, at the very least.
Anna and I haven't really spoken since we left the cult. She doesn't even trust spending time with me, though I'm not too sure why and I don't really think I want to pull on that thread. At this point, it is whatever it is.
On some level, it creates some normalcy to the whole situation.
But I want it to end.
I'm tired of it.
- Zane
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Day 237
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What else could it be?
Why are we still in danger?
How bad is it that time has fucking frozen?
I want it to stop.
- Zane
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Day 238
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There is talk of going out to go find new people for the group. Alan and Bill are more concerned with going back to rescue some of the other ex-cultist. I don't see the sense in it. They didn't follow us when we escaped. I find it hard to believe they will still be around the camp, even if they are now free.
Anna argued that someone might have taken over. I seconded that.
Pico and Ricardo have been sneaking out though. Not too sure why, but I'd hazard a guess they are probably looking to score some drugs somewhere. It's what they've largely been doing. Steal drugs and share some with the guys. I'm not interested so they generally leave me out of their dealings.
I like it that way.
- Zane
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Day 240
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Bill, Alan, Agnes, Ricardo and Pico ended up taking the journey back to the camp. Though their collective group couldn't unfreeze the van so they had to find a small car somewhere.
I don't envy them but that's practically stealing a stiff's car.
Not so different from the Van... but then again, it's not like we were there when it was stolen.
- Zane
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Day 252
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shitGenius returned!!
Cue the celebration.
He returned a few minutes ago really, talking about what we're missing and how we really should start making our way to where he was, about what we have to see.
Something, something, theory is right.
I'd like to say I care but I don't.
I've got a few hundred pages left of this book I'm reading.
- Zane
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Day 253
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We're in the car again.
Boss Anna believes in the shitGenius so we're all headed to NASA HQ, apparently.
Can't lie, I'm kinda angry, to be honest with you. I was getting comfortable staying in one place. This is just infuriating really.
The dude is trying to explain and to be frank with you, I'm mentally checked out.
- Zane
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Day 255
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Alright, so we're in the HQ.
We took some supplies with us on the journey. Anna figured we might be there a few days at least so might as well be prepared, especially seeing as we had the van with us.
As it turns out, shitGenius met someone in the branch, an old man by the name of Adam. The old man had been there on his own for so long that he's not quite as there as he should be. Our presence set him on end for a while but we managed to get him to calm down a bit.
He reminds me that I could have been him if not for a decent sleep and meeting Anna.
Adam had stayed in the building by himself, occasionally branching out for food but he never left. He never tried to find anyone else or find out what was happening. He sorta just stayed and slowly descended into a mild insanity. Or whatever the term is called.
In any case…
We're here because apparently, there might be a meteorite heading towards earth.
A fucking meteorite.
At this point, I'm beginning to think some deity is just trying to fuck with us for no reason. The old man had run some preliminary diagnosis before he lost it, trying to estimate when the collision would happen and the time of the collision. That is what he whispered to himself incessantly, at random times during the day.
