The complete oregon seri.., p.83
The Complete Oregon Series, page 83
Little Jack snorted and tried to veer to the left, away from the whirring blade to his right. Unlike his bigger companion, he was still fairly new to pulling the mower.
“Hey there! None of that, Little Jack.” She flicked the reins over his broad back and worked to keep the horses driving in a straight line.
Morning dew was long gone from the field, and the sun was rising. Sweat dripped into her eyes, but she had no time to wipe it away. Next to her, lush stalks fell. Field mice scurried into their hidden holes, and a hawk circled above, waiting for a snack that might be left behind by the rattling blade.
Nora steered the mower around and around until, hours later, the whole field was mowed. If they were lucky enough to get a few days of sunshine, they’d be able to bring in the hay by the end of the week.
Days later, Nora took pitchers of cool water from the wagon and placed them in the shade of a tree while she listened to the preparations going on all around her. Luke said haying reminded her of a battle, and sometimes it was. Some years, they raced against time to bring in their hay before rain could ruin it.
“Hank, you drive the wagon. Emmett, you climb up and pack down the hay,” Amy shouted across the field.
If haying is a battle, then Amy is our commander. And she’s doing a good job. Nora was filled with pride and sorry that Luke wasn’t there to see how well their daughter had adjusted to her responsibilities.
“I’ll drive the dump rake,” Amy said.
Despite her worries about bruised ribs, Nora let her climb on the rake. She didn’t want to undermine Amy’s authority in front of the ranch hands a second time. Amy had worked too hard to gain their respect. At least driving the rake wasn’t as bad as being jostled around on the mower.
The curved wooden tines of the rake lowered to the ground, and with a shout from Amy, Little Jack started to move. The twelve-foot-long rake quickly filled with hay. When it was full, Amy pushed a lever with her foot. The rake rose and dropped a long pile of hay onto the field. Then the tines dropped down to gather more.
When Amy reached the end of the field, she turned Little Jack and urged him back the other way, next to the piles of hay she had already gathered. Each time she passed them, she pressed the lever and dropped another load of hay next to the one she had made on the previous pass. Long windrows formed until, finally, all the hay was gathered into long rows stretching across the field.
Nora had driven the dump rake a time or two before. She knew it wasn’t easy to push the lever at the right moment. The first time she had done it, her windrows had been crooked. Amy’s were straight and even, each stalk where it should be.
Tess wandered over, pitchfork already in hand. “She’s good at that.” She nodded to Amy.
Shading her eyes with one hand, Nora watched as Amy lowered the rake’s teeth once again. She didn’t try to hide her pride. “Yes, she is.”
“Luke mentioned that she’s running the ranch until he gets back,” Tess said.
“We thought it might be a good test to see if she really wants to take over the ranch one day.”
Tess turned away from watching Amy and glanced at Nora. “Luke would love that, wouldn’t he?”
“Only if it’s what Amy wants for herself.”
“What do you think about it?” Tess asked.
“With Luke as her parent, Amy grew up thinking that it’s all right for a woman to work with horses, ride the range, and make her own decisions.”
“And this was just Luke’s influence?”
“No,” Nora said. “I wanted this kind of freedom for our daughters too. It’s been wonderful to see our girls grow up into strong young women.” Her gaze slid to Nattie, who gestured at her pitchfork as she explained something to Frankie.
“So that’s a good thing, right?” Tess asked.
Nora looked at her old friend. “Yes, but the rest of the world doesn’t think so. You saw what happened with Adam. If Amy chooses to take over the ranch, she won’t have an easy life.”
“Your life isn’t exactly easy either,” Tess said. “Just because life isn’t easy doesn’t mean it can’t be happy. Or do you regret your decision to stay with Luke even after you found out about...him?”
“No, of course not.”
“But?”
So Tess could still read between the lines. “Sometimes, I wonder if Luke is truly happy.”
Blue eyes widened. “You’ve got to be kidding!”
Never voiced concerns clawed at Nora, finally wanting to be spoken. “The life we built together, it’s so fragile. She knows it could be snatched away in a heartbeat, so I wonder if she ever lets herself be completely happy.”
“Are you saying you aren’t happy?”
“No, God, no! It’s just...” Sometimes, she sensed the remaining tension in Luke, and it bothered her that she couldn’t give her that complete peace and happiness.
“Sweetie.” Tess dropped her pitchfork to clutch Nora’s hands. “I’ve known Luke for many years, and he’s never been so at peace as when he’s talking about his life with you.”
The words eased Nora’s worries. “He?” She glanced over her shoulder. They were alone on this part of the field, but Tess kept using male pronouns.
“I know he’s...she’s a woman,” Tess said, her voice low, “but when Luke was with me...” She trailed off and shook her head. “You don’t want to hear this.”
Part of her wanted to pretend Luke had never been with anyone but her, but the bigger part wanted to learn whatever she could and understand Luke even better than she already did. “I know you and Luke were more than friends for a while.” When Tess looked away, she squeezed her hands. “I’m not jealous. I’m grateful you were there for her when she thought no one would ever love her.”
“And Luke was there for me when I thought no one would ever love me,” Tess said. At the mere mention of love, her gaze left Nora and found Frankie.
Nora smiled. “So, what did you want to say about Luke?”
“When we first met, he...she...”
“It’s all right.” Nora touched Tess’s forearm. “Use whatever feels more natural to you. I know Luke wouldn’t mind either way.”
“When we first met, he was lonely, cut off from the rest of the world by the need to hide and keep his distance. He was starved for some human touch and affection, yet when he shared my bed...” Tess stopped and looked at her as if to make sure she was still all right with hearing about Luke’s past.
Nora’s gaze darted left and right. Once she was sure no one was within hearing distance, she nodded at Tess to go on.
“Luke is a wonderful lover, as I’m sure you know.” A mischievous smile dimpled Tess’s cheeks, and Nora felt heat suffuse her face. “She didn’t know what to do with a woman, but she was gentle and attentive. She came into my life at a time when I had already given up on that, so what we had was special. But she rarely allowed me to touch her freely, to touch her as I would another woman. I always got the feeling Luke was more comfortable if I thought of him as a man—so I did.”
It had been like that between her and Luke in the beginning too.
“I take it that’s not how it is between the two of you?” Tess leaned closer. “Does Luke allow you to caress her breasts, to touch—”
“Lord, Tess!” Blood rushed to Nora’s skin, and she knew she was blushing bright red. None of the neighbor women talked about intimate matters so openly. As a matter of fact, they don’t talk about it at all. A lady isn’t supposed to enjoy relations with her husband, much less talk about it.
“What?” Tess chuckled. “You never used to blush about these things.”
Her years in Tess’s brothel felt like a lifetime ago, and Nora knew she wasn’t the same woman anymore. She rubbed the tip of her glowing ear. “Back then, we were talking about the men who touched my body. Luke touches my heart and soul.”
Tess pulled her into a quick hug. “I’m so happy for you. And I’m sorry for asking about private matters between the two of you.”
“No, it’s all right. You can ask. I know you ask because you care about us.”
“I do.” With one last squeeze, Tess let go. The grin returned to her face. “And you don’t need to answer. Your blush speaks for itself.”
Again, Nora felt her cheeks grow warm, and she chuckled. “Yeah, well...”
“It’s wonderful to know Luke trusts you enough to make herself vulnerable and show you her female side.”
It was wonderful. Nora loved the female side as much as the Lucas Hamilton that Luke showed to the world. But old doubts remained, and maybe it was finally time to share them with someone. “Sometimes, I wonder if that kind of trust isn’t making things harder for her.”
“Harder?” Tess shook her head. “How could that be?”
“Before I met Luke, there wasn’t much difference between how she was in private and how she acted around others. The life she lived was that of a man—in almost every way.” Seventeen years ago, small children had terrified Luke. She hadn’t known how to comfort Amy and had stiffened whenever Amy’s little arms wrapped around her in a hug. Back then, Luke had been cut off not just from other people, but from her own emotions. Good gracious, she didn’t even name her horse, just because she thought it was unmanly.
“And now?” Tess asked.
“And now she enjoys brushing my hair at night. She cries in my arms when one of our horses dies, and sometimes, she comes home with a bouquet of wildflowers and leaves little love notes for me all over the house.” Last night, she had found a romantic little note hidden in the drawer that held her chemises. “And,” she added with a hint of a blush, “she enjoys it when I make love to her.”
A frown deepened the lines on Tess’s forehead. “I’d think all of that would make her life happier, not harder.”
“Yes, but now she needs to pretend and lie more in the rest of her life to hide that softer side. Now there are two Lukes, where before, there was only one.”
A golden-silver lock of hair tumbled from beneath Tess’s bonnet when she shook her head. “That part of Luke has always been there. It was just smothered and ignored all those years. Now for the first time, Luke has someone in his life that he trusts enough to show both sides. Your love isn’t trapping him. It’s freeing him.”
“Hey, you two!” A pitchfork of hay rained down on them.
Nora looked up and into Frankie’s grinning face.
“Are you here to gab or to help with the haying?” Frankie asked, one hand on her hip.
When Nora let her gaze wander over the field, she found that Amy had finished raking. Now Toby drove the bigger buck rake along the rows of hay and raked them into larger piles.
Tess stuck her tongue out at Frankie, making her look like a little girl despite the gray streaks in her hair. “Gab.”
Another forkful of hay hit Tess in the chest. “Help.” Frankie returned the playful grin.
Tess picked up her pitchfork and tossed hay in Frankie’s direction.
“Hey, what’s going on?” Amy strode toward them. “Mama, you did tell them that the hay is supposed to go in the wagon, right?”
Nora laughed. It was good to have Tess back in her life.
“Whoa!” Hank called when the wagon rolled through the big double doors of the barn. It pulled to a stop right under the hay door that went up into the loft.
Amy jumped down from the wagon. Before Emmett could do it, she extended a hand to help Rika down.
Emmett climbed into the hayloft. From a track on the roof of the barn, the hayfork was lowered into the wagon, and Hank guided it to grasp a load of hay.
“Come on.” Amy nudged Rika, who stared up into the loft. “You can help me with the horses.” Two geldings were already harnessed to the rope that ran through a system of pulleys. “Grab his bridle.”
They urged the horses forward, and the hay was lifted into the loft.
Up in the loft, Emmett shouted, “Stop ’em!”
“Whoa!” Amy pulled the horse on her side to a stop while Rika tightened her grip on the other gelding.
They smiled at each other.
Hank pulled the rope that tripped the release, opening the hayfork and dropping its load into the loft. While he directed the fork back into the wagon, Amy turned the horses to heave up the next load.
After several repetitions, the wagon sat empty. A sense of accomplishment swept over Amy, and she shook her head at herself. It’s just the first load. Back to work. She turned toward Hank. “You and Emmett take the wagon back to the field. Rika and I will climb up and stack the hay to make room for more.”
The two men didn’t hesitate to follow her orders. Within a minute, the wagon rumbled out of the barn, leaving Amy and Rika behind.
“You up for it?” Amy pointed to the loft. Stowing away the hay was hard work.
“Of course.” Rika never shied away from any task. It was part of what Amy liked about her.
Stifling hot air engulfed Amy as soon as she stuck her head through the open hay door and pulled herself into the loft. The sun had been standing high up in the sky for hours, and heat accumulated under the roof. Sweat trickled down her back, and she hadn’t even picked up a pitchfork yet.
“What do I do?” Rika asked, pitchfork already in hand.
The hay had been dropped in the middle of the loft, and Amy pointed at the big pile. “We spread the hay and level it to make room for more. Be sure to fill the corners and edges of the loft.” To demonstrate, she stuck her pitchfork into the hay and lifted the first forkful. Two quick steps and she dropped it neatly into one corner of the hayloft.
They worked side by side, sometimes brushing against each other as they walked back and forth between the corners and the big hay pile. Combined with the dusty heat in the loft, the little touches made her blood seem to boil. It was sweet torture, and Amy berated herself but couldn’t quite stop.
Finally, she paused and leaned on her pitchfork to wipe sweat from her face. Her gaze swept over what they had accomplished and the shrinking pile of hay in the middle of the loft. Then she looked at Rika, and for a few moments, she forgot the work still to be done.
Beams of sunlight trickled into the loft, bathing Rika in gold. Her skirt and bodice, damp with sweat, clung to the gentle curves of her body. She had removed her bonnet, and now stalks of hay dotted the mahogany hair. A few tendrils had gotten loose from their pins and stuck to the fair skin of her neck. Her face was flushed, and Amy watched as a drop of sweat trailed down her neck. She wanted to step closer and kiss away that bead of sweat.
“What?” Rika set down her pitchfork when she noticed Amy’s staring. Her gloved hands flew up to touch her hair. “Something wrong with my hair?”
It’s beautiful, Amy wanted to say, but, of course, she didn’t. “No. It’s just covered in hay dust.”
“So’s yours.” Rika reached out but pulled back before she touched Amy’s hair.
Amy cleared her throat. “Let’s get something to drink.” She walked to the edge of the hayloft, where she’d left her canteen. Maybe cooling off with a sip of water would chase away the inappropriate thoughts swirling through her head. She uncorked the canteen and handed it to Rika first.
With a nod of thanks, Rika lifted the canteen to her lips and tilted back her head. Amy couldn’t help watching the graceful arch of her neck as she swallowed. The urge to press her lips to that fair neck raced through her, and she fought it down. Usually, she had much better control over those urges. Must be the heat up here. It’s messing with my head. She took the canteen back and took a swig. The water was warm, but it still felt good sliding down her parched throat.
A soft hand touched her forearm. Rika had taken off her gloves and trailed her fingers up to the bend of Amy’s arm.
The gulp of water in Amy’s mouth shot back out.
“Hey!” Rika jumped back when drops of water drenched her.
Coughing and wheezing, Amy stared at her, then at her own arm, which still tingled. “W-what are you doing?”
“Your arms...”
“What about them?” Amy stared at her arms, halfway expecting to see burn marks where Rika’s touch had heated her skin. Instead, her forearms were speckled with tiny red marks where hay stalks had pricked her.
“You should roll down your sleeves,” Rika said. She wiped a few drops of water from her face. “And thanks for the refreshment.”
Dumbfounded, Amy stared at her for a second and then discovered the unexpected twinkle in the brown eyes. When Rika had first arrived at the ranch, she had been earnest and serious all the time. Rarely had Amy seen her laugh or smile, and the good-natured teasing in the Hamilton family had clearly been foreign to her.
But now a mischievous grin parted her lips, giving Amy a glance of the charming gap between her front teeth. The sight of Rika’s playfulness filled Amy with a heady feeling. Laughter bubbled up, chasing away her awkward breathlessness. “Oh, you! Since I provided you with a nice cooling bath, how about I help you dry off too?” Not giving Rika time to answer or flee, she picked up a handful of hay and threw it at her.
Rika sputtered and blew stalks away from her face. Then she dived for Amy.
They tumbled into the hay, laughing and trying to stuff handfuls of hay down each other’s clothes. Light-headedness gripped Amy, and she felt drunk on Rika’s laughter.
They rolled through a pile of hay, stalks raining down on them. A warm touch slid up Amy’s belly. She froze. Then hay tickled her skin, and she tried to squirm away. Next to the still open hay door, they rolled to a stop with Rika coming to rest on top of her.
“Careful,” Amy whispered, not just meaning the open hatch next to them. She felt on the edge of something dangerous, something she couldn’t name. Her breath rattled through her chest, and it wasn’t the weight on top of her that made her breathless.
