Always have always will, p.6
Always Have, Always Will, page 6
Caroline rises on her toes and brushes her lips across mine. Before she can lower herself down, I grasp her waist, lift her, and turn us both, pulling her into my lap on the bench. Her legs fall between mine, her toes skimming the deck. I slide my right hand along her neck, tilt her head upward, and drag my thumb across her lips. I hesitate a moment simply to wrap my head around the notion I’m about to kiss my best friend. Again. I wish I remembered the first time.
Pushing my concern for our friendship away, I lower my lips to hers. At first our kiss is tentative. Perhaps she’s feeling the same concerns as me. I feel the moment she lets go of her concerns that it’s me. The tenor of our kisses increases exponentially. She opens for me, and I glide my tongue along her lips before exploring her mouth. Her tongue tangles with mine, and our surroundings fall away. I’ll never forgive myself for waiting so long. I had solid reasons, but I don’t see a time when I’ll not want her in my arms and the press of her supple lips against mine ever again.
She puts some space between us after a few soft kisses to my lips. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long.”
“Why didn’t you?” I know some of the answer. She wasn’t going to force our relationship into something I wasn’t ready for.
“I was afraid to ruin us.”
“And now?”
“I’m still concerned about destroying our decade plus of friendship, but it was absolutely worth the wait.”
I draw her even closer and kiss her temple. “I agree.”
The boat slows near the dock. “Sir, miss, you’ll be able to disembark in about ten minutes. Please don’t forget your stowed items,” Cassie informs us.
“Thank you,” I reply.
She retreats to where she came from.
“Ready for the next part of our date?”
“Absolutely.” She leans in and kisses me softly. “This might turn into a problem for me.”
“What?”
“I feel like I need to make up for lost time.”
“I won’t stop you.”
She laughs and pushes up to her feet. I follow her below deck where we collect our belongings. Hand in hand, we return to my car and head to the next part of our day together.
Chapter Twelve
August
I pull away from the dock and head to Cash’s penthouse. Even though I upgraded my kitchen, Cash has more space for our movie afternoon. Unfortunately, the weather may not cooperate with my outdoor plans for today.
About ten minutes later, I pull into the parking garage and use one of his spaces. Both are empty since he and Noelle have moved to Maine. It would be nice to be near my siblings again, but I haven’t been able to find a suitable location for my restaurant there, at least not yet. I haven’t eliminated the idea of moving there too even though I’ll miss the city.
That notion is exactly the opposite of my brothers. The main difference is my brothers and their significant others were hounded by the press. I’m not even remotely as interesting as my older brothers to the tabloids or gossip mongers. I’ve always been reclusive, and Caroline has always been beside me. To the outside world, I’ve been off the market for years despite the lack of a ring on my finger or hers, even if it wasn’t accurate, at least then.
I round the car, grab her bag and mine from the back seat, and take her hand in mine before entering the lobby. She doesn’t hesitate.
“Good afternoon, Arthur.” Arthur has been the concierge for the building since before Cash moved in.
“Hello, Mr. Morgan and Miss Waterman.”
“How is your family? Any new grandchildren since I saw you last?”
Arthur laughs. “No new ones and none on the way I’m aware of yet. Your delivery was sent up about two hours ago. Have a nice afternoon.”
“Thank you. You too.” I tighten my grip on her hand and lead her up to Cash’s. I guess it’s Cash and Sam’s now. When Sam and Savannah left the city, Sam sold his home and added the proceeds to the sibling trust account. They kept Cash’s place mostly because of his terrace.
“What delivery?” Caroline asks as the doors close.
“Food for dinner.”
“We didn’t need to come here for you to cook. Your kitchen at home is amazing too.”
“The kitchen isn’t the only reason we’re here.”
“Okay.”
Dating Caroline should be easier than dating a stranger, if you will, since I have years of knowledge a normal first date wouldn’t have. After setting our bags on the island, I retrieve the delivery from the anteroom in the foyer.
“Am I allowed to help?” Her voice is quieter than normal.
I add the bags to the island. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I’m working on navigating this.” She motions back and forth between us.
I move back around the island, taking her hands in mine. “How about we act as we normally would with the added benefit now you can kiss me whenever you wish?”
“Don’t you get to kiss me too?”
“Yes, I do.” I lean forward and kiss her again. No hesitation, no concern moving forward isn’t the best decision I’ve ever made in my life. “Why don’t we change, cook your favorite comfort food, and then watch your favorite movie of all time on the terrace?”
A smile materializes on her gorgeous face. “Using your best friend knowledge to your advantage, huh?”
“Why would I even consider not using it? It’s a gold mine no other man would have.”
“True, very true. It sounds perfect.” After a quick kiss, she scoops up her tote and walks away.
Watching her walk away takes on a whole new meaning today. I didn’t miss the fact Caroline is gorgeous all these years. Hell, I’ve seen the looks from other men when we’re out together. I saw one this morning at the marina. I didn’t take the time to consider she could be mine one day. She has curves that make me weak. I knew before I held her close and even before I felt the caress of her lips on mine. Now having had her luscious curves against me and knowing kissing her makes time stand still, I’m in heaven. Aside from her physical attributes, which to me are unmatched, she’s truly one of the most genuine people I’ve ever known.
I take a few deep breaths before changing in the guest bathroom. I exchange my jeans and shirt for shorts and a vintage Dave Matthews T-shirt. Having older brothers shapes your music choices.
When I return to the kitchen, Caro has her back to me. She changed into a pair of capri leggings and a threadbare T-shirt. Unfortunately for me, she has a tank top on as well. Her long, dark hair is pulled back into a ponytail which falls halfway down her back. She has emptied the bags and pulled all the necessary cooking tools from the cabinets.
“Do you want a new job?” I ask her.
“No, you belong in a kitchen day in and day out. I only like being here with you beside me.”
“I think you diminish your capabilities, sweetheart.” Ever since her comment, I’ve seen more subtle reactions to me and my words, like the slight curve of her lips at the endearment. I’m a fool for missing these subtle clues. I won’t let you go now.
“Maybe, but you would get sick of me.”
“No chance of that ever happening. You do recall we spent all day, every day together in boarding school. We met for breakfast, had all the same classes, ate lunch, dinner, and studied together until it was time for bed.”
“True. What are we making?”
I round the island, wrap my arms around her from behind, and set my mouth to the nape of her neck. Her hands flatten against the cold granite.
Her head falls forward.
“I’m going to find every spot that makes you squirm, cuore mio.” I grasp the collar of her shirt and tug it toward her shoulder. I follow the fabric with my mouth, feeling her shiver in my arms. “Learning your body is fast becoming one of my favorite things to do.”
Her hands slide off the granite to the front of my thighs, her fingernails digging into my flesh. “Auggie.”
After reaching as far as her shirt will allow, I turn back and kiss along the same expanse of exposed skin toward her neck. “Do you want me to stop?” I whisper near her ear.
“No. Yes. I don’t know.”
I turn her in my arms and lift her onto the island, setting my palms right above her knees. Now we’re at eye level. “Too fast?”
“Not necessarily. As much as I want to be right here with you as your date, you’re my best friend, and separating the two is harder than I thought. How are you able to do it?”
“Honestly, after we talked about your reactions to me, I decided to pay attention to you as if you’re a stranger to me. You were correct. I didn’t see your reactions to me because of who you are. Forcing myself to think of you as someone I barely know allows me to see you’re equally as attracted to me as I am to you. I saw you react to me calling you sweetheart before. I never would have noticed if I thought my best friend is sitting in front of me, her skin wet from my mouth, and I would bet you’re as aroused as I am.”
The flush of pink creeping across her flawless skin tells me I’m at least correct about the aroused part.
“Makes sense. I’ll try it too. Let’s get started on this food. I’m hungry.”
Leaning forward, I wrap my arm around her waist, lifting her against me. I kiss her softly before slowly lowering her to the floor. My statement from before is confirmed when she snaps her eyes shut before she reaches the floor. The harsh exhale as she washes her hands is simply more evidence as well.
I wash my hands too before filling the pot with water for the noodles.
“What can I do?”
“Shred the cheese,” I suggest.
Caroline steps around me, grabs the shredder, and gets started. Once she has enough, I add it to the sauce base I’m preparing in the pan. We’ve made so many meals together, its seamless. While the crust of her favorite comfort food is crisping in the oven, we wash and dry the cooking dishes.
“Do you want to eat first or during the movie?”
“During is fine.”
I grab two plates, silverware, and two glasses and set them on the island right before the timer sounds.
“Can you plate dinner while I set up the movie?”
“Sure.”
I step out of the kitchen, grab the movie from my bag, and move to the terrace to set it up.
Chapter Thirteen
Caroline
Dating your best friend isn’t as easy as I thought it would be. At least the romantic parts aren’t. I didn’t realize how many reactions to Auggie I was suppressing all these years. As I finish plating our dinner, I watch him set up for our movie night. Auggie and I have had plenty of these over the years. It’s how he knows my favorite movie of all time is The Princess Bride.
It’s near four as we settle onto the double chaise complete with comfy pillows and a blanket on Cash’s terrace. I forgot Cash had the movie screen built in for the Super Bowl about five years ago. The sun is lowering toward the horizon. Colors dance across the sky in shades of red, orange, and pink.
“Ready?”
I nod. Auggie starts the movie and digs into his plate. The movie starts while we eat. I’ve seen this movie so many times, I can quote most of it. I’m sure Auggie can as well. I set my plate on the side table and push up against the back of the chaise. Soon thereafter Auggie does the same. I scoot closer to him and rest my head on his chest. I can feel his heart beating against my temple.
“Cold?”
“No.”
His arm settles around me, drawing me even closer. This feels better than I ever dreamed it would. I need to stop thinking so much. Yes, this is Auggie. Yes, we’ve been friends for a long time. This shouldn’t be awkward. Yet it is the slightest bit.
“What are you thinking about?”
“How do you know?” I lift my head to look at him.
“You tensed up. Do you want me to move?” Concern he overstepped laces his voice.
“No, absolutely not.” I set my hand on his chest, shift one leg between his and press up to kiss him.
He hesitates ever so slightly before pushing us up to sitting. I rock back onto my heels and slide my hands up to cup his square jaw. His hands bracket my waist to steady me before dipping beneath the hem of my shirts. The heat of his fingers splayed across my back feels decadent. What will this feel like with… no, focus on now.
When my lips finally graze his, everything around us falls away again. I feel the caress of his skin on mine and the prick of his facial hair on my chin. Lowering my hands, I lift the hem of his shirt over his head. His hands settle on the flare of my hips.
“I thought my eyes were deceiving me,” I mumble.
“What?”
“I thought my eyes were deceiving me,” I repeat.
“Meaning?”
“When I tucked you in after the rehearsal dinner, I intended to remove your shoes and your dress shirt. I distinctly recall you sharing at some point you always wear an undershirt when you’re cooking for fear of splattering something hot on yourself.”
“That’s accurate.”
“But you weren’t the night of Billie’s rehearsal. When I removed your shirt, I was expecting to find an undershirt, not your finely sculpted chest.”
“I don’t know how to respond—”
I cut him off when I press my mouth to the center of his chest. His fingers dig into me as my name falls from his lips in a whisper. I map his chest with my mouth, down his left flank. His side is marked with a tattoo of his initials in an elegant script. He added the ink right after we graduated from boarding school.
Before I can decipher it or comment, Auggie gathers the edge of my shirt and tank top, peeling it over my head. Now I’m cursing my good sense for leaving the girls’ gift at home in the box. I’m not suggesting the set I chose is ugly, but not that sexy. His eyes stare into mine like he’s never catalogued them before, as if he’s afraid to look at the skin he just exposed. I’ve taken a picture with my brain of each fleck of gold in his deep chocolate eyes. Today I added a sensory map of his lips and chest to memory. The look doesn’t dissipate.
“Please tell me,” I murmur.
“I know you’re beautiful in the abstract. I’ve seen men look at you when we’re out together. The looks range from jealousy to admiration to lust. Now I’m seeing you differently. I can’t explain—”
I bring my finger over his lips. “I understand. Even though I wasn’t completely believing my eyes, I was where you are after the rehearsal. I’m still grasping the fact I don’t have to consider proper placement of my hands or lips when we’re alone. It’s enthralling and scary at the same time.”
“It isn’t just me?”
“No.”
He hesitates a mere second before his mouth crushes to mine, his hands flat against my back. He kisses a path along my jaw. With a tug of my ponytail, he bares the column of my neck to his mouth. It’s difficult to sit still when every time his breath heats my skin, I feel pressure between my thighs. Auggie drags his tongue along the lace edge of my bra before continuing down the center of my chest. I move my hands from his shoulders behind me to support myself. I’m so twisted up in the sensual feelings from Auggie I miss the first few droplets of rain falling on my skin.
“We should go inside,” he mumbles against my rib cage before looking up at me.
I frown. “Fine. I don’t like it, but fine.”
“I’m not a fan of you covering up either, but we can’t stay out here.” I gather our clothes while Auggie gathers the dishes. Once I deposit our clothes inside, I head back out for the DVD and to close the screen. Thankfully, it’s protected from the elements. I grab a few pillows while Auggie grabs the rest.
Once we put the pillows back where they belong, Auggie tugs his shirt over his head. I pull on my T-shirt and the sweatshirt from my tote simply because it’s dry and warm. Silently we wash and dry our dishes.
“Ready to go home, sweetheart?”
“No, but I know I have to. I have young minds to mold in the morning.”
Taking my hand in his, Auggie leads me into the elevator straight down to the parking garage.
“When can I see you again?” His voice is quiet and unsure.
I’ve known Auggie more than half my life. It doesn’t sound odd to me I want to see him every single possible second. “Are you off tomorrow?”
“No. I’m not off until Thursday this week. Are you free?” He turns out of the parking garage.
“Yes, I’m free.”
“Can I cook for you at your place?”
“I would love that.”
During the drive, he takes my hand in his, intertwining our fingers. I’ve wanted to be like this with him for so long. Now it’s happening, it’s taking some effort not to worry about our friendship as well. I need to trust we can navigate these changes together.
Auggie pulls up in front of my townhouse and escorts me to my door.
“I enjoyed our date.”
“I did too, Auggie.”
He slides his arms around my waist and draws me closer. The look in his eyes is crystal clear. He isn’t nervous anymore. Now I need to get myself there too. Lowering his lips to mine, Auggie kisses me possessively as if the second I walk inside our entire day together will evaporate.
“I may be nervous we’ll ruin our friendship, but I won’t run, Auggie.”
“How do you always know what I need to hear, cuore mio?”
“It’s a finely honed skilled. You have it too. Like when I learned my mom was sick.”
I recall those details vividly. We were at boarding school and the headmaster summoned me to the office. As always, Auggie was beside me.
“I’m coming with you,” he stated with no room for argument.
When we arrived, the headmaster had us take a seat. “Miss Waterman, are you sure you would like Master Morgan present, this information is of a sensitive and personal nature?”
“Yes, headmaster. He’s my best friend. If you make him leave, I’ll tell him as soon as you’re finished.”
“Very well. There’s no easy way to share this. Your mother has an advanced form of cancer. She will be entering treatment starting tomorrow. Your father will be here to escort you home for an extended weekend visit.”
