Unfortunately for him, I wasn’t making a choice anytime soon. I was young and naïve when it came to relationships. Both the men I loved were forced on me by the elementals. I still cared for them and missed them immensely, but I wasn’t in a hurry to do it wrong again. I needed to learn how to trust my own heart, to know if my feelings were real and not some bond. I had several lifetimes to find the man I truly wanted to love. As long as my new job didn’t kill me first.

  He smiled, his fingers trailing down my arm. “I need to talk to the king and you need to get dressed. Your team is awake.”

  “Thanks, Lodron.”

  My team, I thought as I watched him walk out the door. Whatever.

  Chapter 6

  Twenty minutes later, I stood in the open door to one of the guest rooms to check on my new friends. At least I hoped they were friends.

  Their room was nothing like the one I recently vacated. It was designed with two people in mind. Two people comfortable with each other but not necessarily in an intimate way.

  A tall, narrow window centered the back wall with a bed on each side. Sunlight beamed through the open curtains. A chest of drawers sat on both the left and right side of the room. One for each occupant.

  Vincent and Blaire sat on their respective beds facing each other. One of the fae healers stood between them with her back to the door. I took a few seconds to finally look at ‘my team’ while they were distracted by their conversation.

  The tight, dark curls on Vincent’s head gave away at least part of his heritage. He had an African ancestor somewhere in the gene pool. The narrowing of his eyes as the healer told him he should stay in bed made me smile.

  Blaire was the complete opposite. Her natural red hair hung in waves around her pale, freckled face. I saw the uncertainty Lodron mentioned as her eyes darted between Vincent and the healer.

  A deep exhaustion was evident on both their faces, but I didn’t see any injuries.

  “I’m starving,” Vincent grumbled. “And don’t need someone hovering over me like a child.”

  His pushed off the bed and swayed. The healer moved to steady him, and he pushed her hand aside.

  I tapped on the doorframe, startling all of them. “I’ll keep an eye on them if you want to have their food delivered.”

  The healer spun around. “I’ll be right back.” She mouthed a ‘thank you’ to me just before she disappeared.

  “Good morning,” I said, walking into the room. I noticed a small table with four narrow chairs just inside the door. It looked like the perfect place to put my butt. “I’m AJ.”

  Blaire rose on shaky legs, but Vincent supported her with a gentle hand, like he was any steadier.

  “I’m Blaire,” the redhead said with a smile. “This is Vince.”

  “How are you not as tired as we are?” Vince asked as they shuffled over to the table.

  “I have lots of practice overusing my magic,” I replied, waving a hand at him. “You’ll get used to it.”

  He laughed and guided Blaire into a seat before dropping down into his own.

  “I haven’t felt this drained since I was a child first learning to use my magic.” The redhead pressed her palms to her eyes.

  I wanted to grill them about their elementals and how long they’d been attached but realized that was probably a bad idea. More kudos for my filter.

  “So.” I cleared my throat and started again. “I really want to thank you for saving my ass yesterday. And I’ll apologize now for my mouth and the lack of filter between it and my brain. I’m working on it.”

  “Those of us who know and love you don’t mind.” Sage appeared in the doorway with a grin and placed drinks on the table along with their breakfast. I hadn’t expected my favorite cook but wasn’t about to complain.

  I jumped up and gave her a one-armed hug. “Who let you out of the kitchen?” I teased.

  She laughed and released me. “Alra wants to see you when you have a few minutes.”

  “Why didn’t he ask himself?” I tapped my temple. “It’s not like he doesn’t already have permission.”

  Her hands went to her hips and I got the ‘mom’ look. “When was the last time you stopped by to see him?”

  I rolled my eyes but only to hide my guilt. It had been a while. I could make the excuse that we’d both been busy, but it was just that. An excuse.

  “I’ll be there in half an hour,” I promised.

  She grinned, then left us. My smile lingered but only for a moment. Not taking the time to visit my favorite blacksmith only reinforced my ‘selfish’ claim. I’d been so wrapped up in my own shit, I forgot about my friend. Something I needed to change.

  Blaire and Vince ate in silence, occasionally stealing glances at me. I had no idea how to start this conversation.

  “I’ll let you ask questions first,” I said, hiding my fidgeting hands under the table.

  “I don’t even know where to begin.” Blaire set her fork on the mostly empty plate and gave me her full attention. “A female elemental with wings came to us a week ago, telling us we’d been selected as Dionadair.”

  Her eyes darted to Vince, who nodded, another glimpse of her insecurity. Was he helping her past it? I hoped so.

  “We got a really brief explanation, then…” She paused and picked up her fork. “I have four elementals in my head. It’s difficult. None of my thoughts are private.” Her pleading eyes met mine. I stared at her, dumbfounded.

  When I’d first discovered my elementals, I struggled with everything. The magic, the mage-partner bond with Kellen, the existence of supernaturals, everything. But the one time I thought I lost my elementals, my entire life fell apart. I was still so relieved to have Niyol back from his stint in elemental jail. I’d dealt with a lot of heartbreak in my life, but nothing hurt like being separated from Niyol.

  I didn’t regret having my elementals in my head, so what was I supposed to tell Blaire?

  “Have you actually met your elementals?” I asked.

  She nodded, and I turned to Vince.

  “Not since we first connected,” he replied. “They talk to me in my head, though.”

  “Then we need to have a tea party,” I said. “Mine are my best friends but only because we communicate really well. Not that it was always sunshine and roses, but we proved our love and loyalty to each other.” I frowned and bit my lip. “I also turn to them with all my insecurities and questions, which keeps them…entertained.”

  The two fae looked at each other, and I suspected they were having a private conversation. So I waited. After a couple minutes, Vince turned back to me.

  “It’s hard for us to set aside a lifetime of mistrust,” he said, leaning back in his chair. “But we’re willing to try. Commander Jesenia has been very open about the threat we face.” His gaze drifted back to Blaire. “I was at the battle in the desert.”

  He didn’t need to say any more. The haunted look settling on his face said it all. He knew our lives hung in the balance.

  “We’re better together,” Blaire said softly, drawing his eyes to her.

  I could’ve been a lamp for all the attention they gave me for the next few seconds. Their friendship and dedication to each other nearly pulsed in the air around us.

  I cleared my throat, and they both looked at me, blushing. “We should schedule a time for us to train together,” I suggested. “Probably a couple hours every day. I expect we’ll be adding a few more to the group very soon. Getting to know each other’s strengths and weaknesses should be first on our list of stuff to do.”

  “I agree,” Vince said. “Blaire and I already spend our evenings together. Maybe you should join us.”

  “Good idea.” I stood and waved off a moment of vertigo. They weren’t the only ones still suffering from the day before. “I’ll see you after dinner. Where are we meeting?”

  The two exchanged a look, and I smiled. There was something going on between them, something more than just friendship.

  “The large training room at the castle?” Blaire asked.

  “Sure. I’ll check with Lodron to make sure it’ll be empty.”

  “This won’t end well, will it?” she asked, another moment of insecurity showing itself.

  “We’ll win,” I said with certainty because the alternative was unimaginable. “But I don’t believe in happy endings. There is no happiness in losing those we love, and we can’t avoid losing them. We can only make sure their sacrifices aren’t in vain.”

  I walked out the door, closing it softly behind me. I should’ve provided positive words of encouragement, but I wouldn’t lie to her. This war with Sabina would suck beyond belief. We’d fought the dark fae twice already, but it didn’t feel like we’d done a thing to weaken them. The attack on Braden’s estate was brutal and reminded me that I needed to talk to Coral about our own protective barrier.

  I shoved the morbid thoughts from my mind and went to visit my friendly empath who didn’t need to be beat up by them.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~

  The constant hammering from Alra’s blacksmith shop met me as soon as I arrived in the front room. So did the enormous fae.

  “AJ!” he called out from behind the long counter, which looked nothing like the last time I’d been here.

  I turned in a slow circle and smiled. Neither did any other part of the room. Large grinding wheels lined one side of the space, replacing the racks of weapons that used to be there. Two men steadily sharpened the long swords in their hands, only glancing at me for a second before returning to their work.

  Alra’s counter now housed two bizarre sewing machines, one of which he slid out from behind.

  “Hi, Alra,” I said, waiting for him to reach me. He bent down and wrapped me in a hug.

  “Your aura feels good,” he whispered. “I was worried you’d be an emotional mess.”

  “I’m just getting better at hiding it,” I said.

  He laughed and put me down. “Liar. I have two more sets of armor for you.” He left me standing in the middle of the room and approached a tall chest of drawers. “And I don’t want to know how you put a hole in the shoulder of your last one.”

  I let his words sink in. Not about the armor but my missing chaotic emotions. Sure, I was worried about what was coming and still pretty upset about Braden’s vampires, but I’d managed to process it. Not on my own. Lodron had to talk me down, but I’d still processed things.

  “Healing takes time, AJ,” Alra called as he pulled two neatly folded sets of fabric from the top drawer. Had he sensed my thoughts? “Look how far you’ve come in the last few weeks.”

  Understanding washed over me. Hadn’t Lodron just said the same thing this morning? He’d probably instigated this whole meeting with Alra.

  Asshole, I thought, hoping the captain of the guard could hear me.

  But I knew both Lodron and Alra were right. I still had a lot I needed to come to terms with, but this was a start.

  My favorite blacksmith invaded my space again, extending the new armor toward me.

  “You’re too smart for your own good,” he said quietly. I truly believed he could read my mind even though he denied it.

  “Mmmhmmm,” I hummed

  “You have three other people checking on you,” he continued. “So make sure you spread the love.”

  I snatched the armor from his hands and draped it over my shoulder. He winked at me, and I couldn’t stop my smile. It felt good to be cared about, even though I was trying to act like I was pissed. I could guess the other two people who wanted to make sure I wasn’t on the verge of a psychotic break. Luria was definitely one. I suspected Ronquil was the other even though I hadn’t seen him since I got back.

  “Same password?” I asked, gesturing to my new armor.

  “Of course. I wouldn’t want to confuse you.”

  I laughed, remembering his initial impatience with my inability to speak the fae spells correctly. The fae language was really fricking hard. Alra smiled with me.

  “Walk with me for a few minutes,” he suggested, nodding towards the door.

  I slid my free hand around his elbow and rolled my eyes. Like I’d tell him no.

  “What’s on your mind?” I asked as we strolled down the wide path through the village.

  “We changed the spells on everyone’s armor,” Alra said. “Coral suggested we make each group of warriors different. I think she got the idea after a conversation with you.”

  I looked up at him, recalling one of my evenings with Coral when we talked about the Elvin soldiers having different runes on their tabards.

  “Good idea. So each group will know the spell, but everyone won’t be the same.” I looked away, realizing my group would know mine. I also realized I didn’t know what group I belonged to.

  We stopped on the outskirts of the small village, and Alra’s large hands gripped my shoulders.

  “Your group currently consists of three people,” he said, obviously feeling my doubts. “But Lodron and Ronquil insisted I tell them the ‘password’ just in case.”

  “And you agreed?” I asked, feeling more than a little betrayed. My insecurities about being vulnerable in that damn room with my nightmare clouded the logical reason for his actions.

  “I can’t see you like that again,” he said, looking away from me.

  My insecurities immediately turned to guilt. After Elise’s dark warrior had beaten me to a pulp, Alra had been the one to remove my armor so Göksu could heal my almost dead body. No one else knew the spell to unlock it.

  “I know it’s selfish for me to give that pain to someone else, but I’m doing it anyway.” He lowered himself to one knee, forcing me to look him in the eye. “I’m a blacksmith who can sometimes be a trainer, but I know my limits.”

  I wrapped my fingers around the large wrists at my shoulders. “You’re also a really good friend who started me down the path I was meant to travel. Don’t sell yourself short.”

  He laughed and pulled me into another smothering hug. “Go find the rest of your team.”

  I watched him walk away, my mind churning through his words. Maybe I needed to accept that he and Lodron were right. I was in a better emotional place, mostly because of the friends I’d made here in the Oceanic Kingdom.

  So, who did I visit first? Dylan? Lodron suggested he’d be a good choice, and I certainly agreed. I would’ve asked Gabby too, but she had enough on her plate getting used to the new prosthetic Alra’s blacksmiths made for her.

  I also wanted to talk to Coral about the barriers protecting not only the fae but the mages. I frowned. Was it even my place to ask? I’d refused every leadership role thrust upon me. They didn’t owe me an explanation and certainly weren’t obligated to include me in any plans. I’d pick Lodron’s brain about it later.

  Time to find Dylan. After I take my new clothes back to my room.

  I went back to my apartment and hung up my new armor, thinking about where Dylan would be. It was late morning and not a day off, so he’d probably be training. Did I want to interrupt him, though? No, not really. And Commander Jesenia wouldn’t appreciate it, either.

  I still didn’t know the commander of the King’s Army very well, but I knew she was a stickler for training, especially right now. So, maybe Dylan wasn’t on the visitor list this morning.

  I dropped down on the edge of my bed, suddenly at a loss of what to do with myself. Normally, I’d be in training with everyone else, but I was still pretty tired even though I tried to ignore it. Pushing myself right now might be kind of stupid. Especially if the dark fae decided not to wait for another attack.

  A hot bath and more food would be a better idea.

  Dylan?

  I wandered into my bathroom, leaving a trail of clothes on the floor.

  AJ! He responded almost immediately, his enthusiasm making me smile.

  I turned on the tap over the enormous copper tub. Can we meet at Sage’s for lunch? I asked, thinking it might be the best place to have my conversation. Out of the prying eyes of the other warriors. Dylan didn’t need peer pressure, and I didn’t want to hurt Gabby’s feelings by talking about something that wasn’t even an option for her.

  Absolutely.

  Great! See you then.

  As soon as the bath was full, I settled down into the steaming water and closed my eyes.

  Chapter 7

  Where are you?

  Lodron’s voice in my head startled me and my face slid beneath the cooling water of my bath. I sputtered, choked, and splashed water all over the floor trying not to drown.

  Don’t do that! I yelled at him. You scared the shit outta me.

  I pulled myself from the tepid water and found a towel. Falling asleep in the tub was a really bad idea. It was probably a good thing Lodron woke me up, but I wasn’t about to tell him that.

  Well? He didn’t bother to hide the irritation in his voice.

  In the bathroom. Give me a minute, I snipped back, wrapping myself in a standard sized bath sheet. One of the few things I loved about being the only short person on the island? Oversized towels. It hung from my armpits to my ankles.

  Swaddled in my favorite terrycloth, I walked out of my bathroom. I stopped mid-stride, a deep blush racing up my neck. Of course Lodron would be waiting for me. He was leaning against my door frame and wearing his dinner clothes. Had I slept the whole day away in the bathtub? No, my fingers weren’t pruney enough.

  Lodron’s eyes made a slow trip up and down my terrycloth-covered body, making me feel naked. Which was stupid. The bath sheet covered more than my pajamas, and he’d seen those several times.

  “Get out so I can get dressed,” I grumbled.

  His mouth twitched, but I wasn’t sure if he was holding back a smile or frown. “Hurry up. We have a meeting to attend.” He pushed off the frame but didn’t close the door.

  “Is it time for dinner already?” I asked, finding my underclothes.

 

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