Drowning in secrets, p.6
Drowning In Secrets, page 6
He shook his head and stared off into space for a moment. His eyes glazed over, and his breathing became heavy.
“Are you alright?” I asked him, but he didn’t respond.
He continued to stare for another few seconds until he turned back to me with a huge smile on his face.
“Rainy, I am really glad you are here. You will play an important role for us, I can see it.”
“Did you just have a vision, or whatever?”
“Yes, I just witnessed forty-five different possible futures, and forty-three of them involved you working alongside us. The other two had you going into great power with the other side. I know this is a big choice to make, and you are probably still confused as to what is going on. The world as you knew it has shifted.”
“No kidding,” I murmured.
“I want you to think about unlocking your powers. We would put you through a few tests, ask you a bunch of questions, and then help you reach your anxiety maximum in a way that is safe for you and others around you. You need to be off medication for at least two weeks to even have a possibility of obtaining your powers.”
I stood up off the bed. “I can’t do this! You are asking me to go crazy for a power that may or may not exist. Not going to happen. I would never put myself through that. I need to get home. I can’t be here. I want to leave,” I said looking him straight in the eye.
“I understand. I trust that if we do send you back, you will not say a word about us to anyone.”
“No promises,” I murmured.
“You won’t,” he deadpanned, and I wondered if he could see that I wouldn’t.
Who would believe me anyway? That would be the fastest way to get shipped off to The Facility; claiming there were a bunch of people living under the sea with impossible superpowers. No way does that sound real. Hell, I am here, and I am not even sure I believe it.
“We will send you home,” he continued, “but I want you to still think about joining us. We want to disassemble this controlled and limited world that the current society has structured. The people need freedom, they need choices, and they need to be able to live. If you never experience anything, are you really living or are you just surviving?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.
He made a good point, but I needed to leave. My parents were probably concerned about where I was. And Dewy! He needs me, and I left him alone. I am so selfish to have wanted to kill myself. Dewy needs me, and I was willing to sacrifice his well-being in order to escape my own problems.
“I need to leave, but I will think about it,” I promised.
He nodded. “We have a submarine that can take you close to the surface, but you will have to swim the rest of the way. If you ever want to come into contact with us again, you will need to swim out to the red barrier and press a button on one of the buoys. You will know it when you see it. It will send a message to our base for someone to come and get you.”
I nodded and followed him back through the hallway. We went down a set of stairs that were also made of glass. Are they seriously not worried about anything breaking here? We climbed down a few stories, passed a greenhouse almost as big as the gym, and a variety of different labs. We eventually made it to an area where the glass was different. It was so thick, the images that you could see on the other side were distorted. The room looked like a garage, except instead of cars there were a variety of boats and submarines.
“Freddee will take you up to the surface where the buoys are located. You must swim the rest of the way. I assume you can swim, right?” Frank asked.
“Yes,” I nodded, following him.
We approached a submarine that couldn’t fit more than two people. Standing in front of it were two men in jumpsuits, twisting and cranking things on the machine. There was also a girl around my age standing in front of it. She was wearing a dark navy-blue shirt with different flower designs on it, and a black skirt. She looked tan, which was odd seeing as they spent all their time out of reach of the sun. She had large brown eyes and gorgeous rich brown hair that flowed over her shoulders. She was by far the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. If she was back in my society, she would have easily been chosen as one of the faces to represent the nation. She smiled when she saw me.
“Hello!” she said.
“Hi,” I replied.
I looked over my shoulder and saw Frank walk away. He followed a man in a jumpsuit to another submarine. I guess I was on my own.
“I’m Rainy and I am looking for someone named Freddee, who is supposed to take me back to the surface so I can go home.”
“Look no further. I’m Freddee, nice to meet you.” She stuck her hand out for me to shake.
“Freddee? Isn’t that an odd name for a girl?” I asked.
“Isn’t Rainy?” she responded with a cocked eyebrow.
“Touché,” I told her with a laugh, and shook her hand.
I could tell I was going to like this girl.
“Alright, let’s get you set up to go back to the shore,” she said, leading me to the submarine door.
Once we were both inside and seat-belted in, the machine started up with a whirr and we started moving forward. This submarine had wheels too!
“Why do you want to go back? Don’t you want to discover what your power is? You can do anything you want here, and you are not limited by what people tell you to do.”
I shrugged, still not convinced.
“Well think of it this way, it is kind of like those books where there is a superhero academy. We train, eat, and live here. Everyone is incredibly nice, and it is impossible to not feel at home. Trust me, with some time you would come to appreciate it.”
“What is a superhero?” I asked her.
“What?” she practically shrieked. “How do you not know what a superhero is?”
The submarine stopped rolling forward, and I saw an incoming submarine float in from the water. It floated into a room full of water. Then all the water was sucked out of the room. The door opened, and it rolled forward into the same room we were in. I guessed that was our exit too.
“Well, I guess they do limit what you read and watch in Euphoria,” Freddee said. “So, you haven't read any books about superheroes? Vampires? Werewolves? Aliens?”
My eyes widened, what the heck was this girl talking about? I shook my head.
“Oh gosh, ok. Well, when you come back, because I know you will, you have to check out our library. It is massive! All the leftover books from the country before are here. There are lots of fiction books, which includes romance, fantasy, science fiction, and so much more. Honestly, a person could spend hours in there.”
“Well, I do like to read,” I told her in a small voice, curious about all the strange terms. “What is your power?” I asked to change the subject, but I was dying to know.
She rolled the machine forward and, a door sealed behind us. Once it was securely shut, a door leading out to the ocean opened, and we were off.
“My power is flight.”
“You can fly?” I asked astounded.
“Yup! That is why I know how to control the submarine. I occasionally have to go up to the surface and fly around to do perimeter checks.”
“But wouldn’t someone see you?”
“You would be surprised how many people fail to look up. And anyway, I move pretty fast, so I am hard to see.”
“That’s awesome! Absolutely amazing!” I told her.
“You might have the power of flight too! You never know until you are brave enough to push against the anxiety.”
“Isn’t it terrifying, though? Enduring that anxiety.”
“Not going to lie, it was one of the worst times of my life, pure agony. But the outcome was worth so much more. I feel free now as if the chains holding me back simply snapped off. I feel like I could do anything, and I am not scared anymore of anything or anyone. The pain is why not a lot of people are willing to access their powers. It’s what allowed the government takeover so easy. People were easy for them to control. They are perfectly fine taking medication and keeping the demons away even if it means never reaching their full potential.”
She gave me a quick once over, “I think you are brave enough, though. I think you would be just fine. Sure, it would suck for a bit, but you would get through it.”
We sat in silence the rest of the way to the surface. We passed colorful fish and different marine animals; some I would have much rather not seen. When we broke the surface, a door at the top of the submarine opened, and a case of stairs unfolded.
“I hope to see you again soon, Rainy,” Freddee said as I began climbing the stairs.
“Me too, and thanks for the ride,” I told her.
Once I reached the exit and breathed in the fresh air, I slid down the front and crashed into the cold water. The buoy was quite a distance away from the shore, but I could make the swim. My breathing was labored as I swam through the water. However, every movement of my arms and legs brought me closer and closer.
I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. I didn’t think I could stay home and endure the life that was planned for me. But I didn’t know if I could go back to the U.P. and try to access my powers. I was not sure I could put myself through that.
I pulled myself onto the sand, my clothes dripping wet. I started walking back to my house. I looked up and saw that the sun was almost set. I missed curfew, and I was going to hear it when I got back.
Chapter 9
“And an hour after curfew!” my mom continued her rant.
“But you were not worried at all, right?” I asked her.
“Hush! Don’t say that word. Of course, I wasn’t. I knew you would come back and if not then we would deal with it. Nothing to fret about.”
Maybe Ian was right. Maybe fear was a good thing. How could a mother not be worried about her child when she was missing? My head throbbed from the episode at the dentist and the new deep ocean revelations. I needed to sleep for a few days before I could think about anything.
“Ok, I am sorry, Mom. I really am,” I told her.
“Fine, go head up to bed. I don’t even understand why you were down by the pier in the first place, and then you were not careful and fell in. Unacceptable, young lady,” she dismissed me.
I stayed silent. I went upstairs to my room. I passed Dewy’s room and saw him sitting on the bed in his pj’s. He shot me a curious look. I hurried towards my room.
I couldn’t tell Dewy anything about what I’d learned today. There would be no way for him to hide it. He isn’t good at keeping secrets. I wanted to keep him safe and protected. I didn’t want to get him in trouble or put him on anyone’s radar for ranting about people with superpowers.
But I couldn’t stay here. I think my mind was made up when I first stepped back into my house. I wanted to go back to the U.P. Even if I didn’t try to unlock any powers, I couldn’t stay here. I needed to be with people who understood what I was going through, with people that could help me.
I shimmied out of my wet clothes and showered in scalding hot water. I wanted to tell Ian what I’d learned. Maybe he would come with me. He was obviously just as unhappy here as I was. Before I made any final decisions, I wanted to run it by him and see what he thought. He seemed more enlightened than anyone else I knew. I pictured him being a leader down there, telling people where to be, and what to do. He radiated power and had a certain charm that swayed anyone he talked to.
Although he seemed dangerous to most people at school, he was also intriguing and a mystery. I was sure he had tempted many girls into throwing themselves at him.
I shook my head and stopped myself from thinking about him. Especially his good looks. That was not what I needed. I needed his brain. He needed to understand what my options were. I knew he wouldn’t report me to anyone. I could have reported him several times for the things we talked about. I would ask tomorrow.
I turned off the shower and dried off. But what about Dewy? I decided that I will write him a letter explaining that I will be gone for a while, but I will see him again. I will tell him how much I love him and to stay strong and keep breathing. Once he gets older, maybe I could come back for him. However, there was no way I was putting him through anxiety to find his powers at his young age. Exploiting his anxiety into extreme panic attacks may have a traumatic effect on him that could stay with him for the rest of his life. He was too young, and it was too big of a risk.
The more I thought about having powers, the more it enthralled me. I wanted that freedom Freddee described. I wanted to break free of the anxiety that had been holding me back every single day of my life. I wanted to get rid of the shadow on my shoulder; the war in my mind that never seemed to end. But could I really do this? Abandon everything I knew just to go live with a bunch of strangers underwater? It sounded crazy. My breathing started to quicken, and my heart pounded.
No. No. It’s ok. I’m going to be ok. Everything will be ok. Everything is going to work out. I just needed to get some sleep. I was overtired. I couldn’t think about this anymore tonight. I would worry about it in the morning. With some deep breathing I eventually drifted off to sleep, and my dreams were filled with colorful fish and cloudless skies.
The next morning, I spotted Ian in the parking lot before first period. I held his eye contact and didn’t waiver. Hopefully he got the message: I needed to speak to him. His eyes widened when he saw me, and his nostrils flared. He hid the vape in his jean pocket and then walked toward me, but the school’s minute warning bell rang.
I mouthed Later.
He looked confused but nodded and then turned around and went into the school. During our break period we met each other under the tree by the courtyard where we knew the others would be. When I got close enough, he grabbed my hand and pulled me into his chest hugging me. He was warm, and I felt a soothing sensation from his hug. It was as if there was no one else in the world besides him and me. His breathing was labored as he pulled back and assessed my face. My gaze lowered to his lips, and I wondered what they would feel like against mine. He broke my trance when he looked over his shoulder making sure we were alone.
“What was that for?” I asked him.
“Your car wasn’t in your driveway last night. Are you ok? Where were you? I got scared you got sent away.”
“Shhhh!” I put a hand over his mouth, and he puckered his lips and kissed my palm sending shivers down my spine.
I pulled my hand away, and he smirked at me. So, I wasn’t the only one who felt something.
Whatever this is, he felt it too. The thought made me want to smile, but then I remembered what was at stake.
“I’m ok, but I need to talk to you.”
I told him everything about the dentist apprenticeship, trying to drown myself, the U.P., and all the people with powers within it. His eyes widened, and his mouth fell open.
“I have heard of them!” Ian said as he ran a hand through his hair, pulling on it slightly. “I didn’t know they were real. This is amazing!”
“Yes, it is. I was thinking if you wanted to…” I started to stutter, suddenly nervous. “We could leave later this week. So, we can get everything in order -”
He cut me off with a sigh and a sad look. “I’m getting sent to The Facility tomorrow.”
My heart dropped, “What? How do you know? That can’t be true!”
“It is,” he said with a defeated look in his eye. “I’m on the maximum medication amount. A government official came to my house yesterday and had a long talk with my parents. They are taking me away in the morning. It will be as if I was never here.” The bell rang as he finished speaking.
“Ok,” I said rushed, “then we go tonight. Meet me at the pier at four o’clock. They told me to get back there we have to swim out to the barrier, and there will be a button on one of the buoys. The button will send a message that we are waiting. Someone will come get us and bring us back to the base.”
“Ok. I will see you then,” he said in a hushed tone as kids started walking by to their next class.
I nodded and then scurried away to my next class. I guess I would be leaving sooner than I expected, but I had to go. If I didn’t leave soon, I would be enrolled into my dental position, and it would be a much bigger deal if I went missing.
The rest of the day went by quickly and I was a ball of nerves. I skipped taking my medication this morning, and the effects were almost immediate. It was like I couldn’t sit still, and I was worrying about everything and anything there was to worry about. What if we got caught? Would anyone try to come search for us? What would happen to my family once we went missing? Would Dewy be ok on his own for a little while? What would the media do about our disappearance? I couldn’t remember anything like that ever happening here.
Once the school day ended, I hurried home to meet Dewy as soon as he arrived.
“Hey, bud,” I greeted him as he got off the bus.
“Hi.” He smiled at me, and my heart broke a little more.
Would Dewy ever have access to powers? I knew he worried, but he was still on the standard amount of medication. I would come back for him; this wasn’t goodbye.
“Let’s go up to your room. I want to talk with you about something,” I told him.
He led the way inside and dropped his backpack on the floor. We trudged up the stairs, and as we were walking, I made small talk about his day at school and what happened. We got inside his room, and I went around to make sure all the tablets and monitors were shut off, so no one could listen in on what I was saying. I sat on his bed taking a deep breath. He sat next to me and hugged one of his favorite stuffed animals to his chest.
“So, listen, Dewy, I am going to be going away for a little while.”
He shot up like a rocket, “The Facility? No! You can’t go there! You can’t!”
