Vanessa blinked. “I told you it was a private party. Why did you allow new guests in?” she asked Dayton, and he just didn’t have an answer for her. He could not tell her the real reason. No way in hell.

  “I-I’m sorry, Vanessa,” he said flatly.

  “It’s not his fault, they barge—” Max tried, but Greg butted in.

  “Look at this mess,” he pointed to his shirt. “This is unbelievable. And the dude freaking punched me!”

  Dayton shuddered, embracing himself as panic pushed on him from the inside, threatening to break him into pieces. “But you were hostile. You were,” he whimpered.

  “Hostile? Seriously? It’s not my fault you can’t take a joke!”

  Vanessa spread her arms. “Enough. Max, I gave you a chance before.” She looked around the guests, as if making sure everyone was listening. “But you hit a guest, and offended them. That is inexcusable. You’re fired!”

  Dayton looked at her, completely drained. All the people gathered were watching him now, judging him. “No... Vanessa, please,” he said, stepping closer. “He just wanted to help.”

  Greg pointed at Dayton. “He was here the whole time and did nothing! He was in on it.”

  Vanessa shook her head. “I will not tolerate staff behaving this way. Enough is enough. Dayton, both of you need to pack your bags and leave. Tonight!”

  Max pulled off his apron and threw it to the floor. “Maybe you should care if your staff is being disrespected!”

  Dayton grabbed his shirt, his heart increasingly frantic. “But... this is my home,” he said, unable to produce anything that made more sense. He was beyond rational thinking.

  “Don’t grovel,” Max said and grabbed his arm. “We’ll work out something much better!”

  Vanessa shook her head. “I’m sorry, Dayton, but you leave me no choice.”

  Dayton let Max pull him toward the corridor leading to the back of the hotel, toward their room and away from the angry faces. His mind was in a state of complete chaos, and all he wanted was to climb deep underneath the comforter, curl up around Cinnamon, and fall asleep forever. But he could not. It’d happened to him again.

  He was homeless.

  Chapter 10

  It was as if all of Dayton’s nightmares had come true at once, filling the real world with a darkness so thick he couldn’t stop himself from shaking as he helplessly moved the contents of the cupboard into a travel bag. He didn’t even have enough bags or boxes to accommodate everything he’d collected throughout the years of living at the River Inn. His whole adult life now needed to be moved somewhere else, but he had nowhere to move it to. His car would not accommodate all his things, and it would certainly not provide enough space for two men and a cat.

  What was he to do?

  “It’s gonna be fine, Day.” Max stroked his shoulder in passing. “Where’s Cin’s carrier?”

  Dayton clenched his hands on a thick sweater, trying to hold back the scream that was choking him from the inside. It was not going to be okay. They had no money and nowhere to go. “H-he doesn’t have his own.”

  “Oh.” Max licked his lips, looking around in silence for a while. “I’ll make him a temporary one out of cardboard.”

  “What if he gets lost somewhere in the woods?” whimpered Dayton, pushing the sweater into the bag as hard as he could, to make more space. Even his muscles hurt from the tension that had taken over his body.

  “He won’t get lost. He’ll be in the box. I’ll find us a place to stay, so don’t sweat it.” Max was done packing the one bag he had and moved on to creating the cat carrier. This time, his words didn’t reassure Dayton, and rage was building up inside him.

  “Why couldn’t you just stay silent? That’s what you do. The customer is always right, even if they are being a nuisance,” said Dayton, tossing a pair of jeans into the bag. Helplessness kept exploding inside his chest, and he couldn’t find a way to silence it.

  Max stared up at him from the floor where he was building the cardboard contraption. “What? He was talking shit about you. And that’s the same guy who gave you a panic attack not so long ago.”

  Dayton shook his head. “So what? I’ve known him since we were both kids. He was always like that, and now he’s got what he wanted. I have nowhere to go and no one to help me, while he goes back home to his wife and kid.

  Max got up from his knees with a frown. “So I was supposed to just ignore what that shithead said? And you’ve got someone to help you. You’ve got me. Or is that not worth remembering?”

  Dayton took as deep of a breath as he could, clutching at the front of his shirt. “B-but you’re not from here. We will have to sleep in the woods, and we don’t have money. And I don’t have a budget for food, because I had the restaurant allowance at the Inn. So yes, if you can’t afford to do something—don’t do it! So you were a hero for a minute, and now we’re homeless!”

  “I’m doing my best! And I said I’ll find us a place to stay, so I will. You can’t have people push you around.”

  “I can’t be homeless again. I didn’t ask you to defend me,” hissed Dayton. “Not everything is black and white.”

  Max sneered. “I will not have anyone insult my boyfriend in front of me. That’s fucking black and white to me!”

  Dayton swallowed a huge gulp of air, his head empty. “Then maybe... this was not a good idea after all,” he finished flatly.

  “What was not a good idea?” Max prodded, and his sole presence felt like pliers squeezing at Dayton’s head. No matter how many butterflies fluttered in Dayton’s stomach when they kissed, Max was beyond reckless. How could Dayton have thought it would work out between them? And now he’d lost his job and home.

  “Being boyfriends,” Dayton whispered, slowly sinking to the mattress with a sense of doom falling on his shoulders and breaking his back.

  Max took shallow breaths, looking as if he was about to throw a punch. “Why do you want to back out at the first hurdle? This is so unfair.”

  Dayton shuddered and rubbed his face nervously. His heart drummed more furiously by the second. He was starting to sweat, and even his teeth clattered. “I... because we have d-different priorities. You might not care, b-but I want to have stability.”

  “And I thought I was gonna meet a filthy-mouthed guy who’s all about edgy sex. Guess we all gotta compromise.” The way Max pinned Dayton to the bed with his stare made Dayton’s stomach ache.

  His eyes smarted, and he looked away from that verbal slap in the face. He couldn’t believe Max would say that to him after having promised to give him time. He could never satisfy Max. He could never become the person Max wanted to be with. Dayton was not that. He would never again be that. “I’m sorry to disappoint you. I didn’t know you would actually ever meet me.”

  Max took a step back and clenched his fists. “You know what pisses me off most? That you don’t even care enough to fight me. It’s like you want us not to work.”

  “Fight you?” Dayton gave a sad laugh, blinking to keep his eyes dry. He wished he’d never written that first letter to Max. It had been the most disastrous idea in his entire life. “But you’re right. I gave you the wrong impression.”

  The hurt expression that flashed across Max’s face made Dayton’s heart crack into pieces, but discomfort was gone as quickly as it appeared, and Max straightened up. “Finish packing. I’ll find us a place to stay.” He turned around, and Dayton just wanted to die. He wished that his heart would just stop, so he wouldn’t have to endure any more of this turmoil.

  Slowly, he forced himself to stand and pulled out his clothes like a robot. His movements followed the program of carrying items from point A to point B, but his mind was a numb slush of memories and guilt.

  He hadn’t always been like this. A long time ago, he would have given Max everything he wanted. Back then, maybe they could have been happy together. But the way he was now, nervous as a cat on the fourth of July and afraid to ever let go, he was not a match for someone so passionate and true to himself. Dayton played it safe. Always. Because whenever he dared to step outside his comfort zone, everything went to shit.

  Just like now, when he was losing the place he called home and was getting his heart carved out of his chest by Max, who left, slamming the door. Dayton wished he could tell himself that Max didn’t know how hard life could be, but it was Max who’d spent over three years in prison for what was finally ruled as self-defense. It was Max whose boxing career was shattered, and whose family didn’t want him back. And yet with all the odds stacked against him and without money, he still pushed all problems aside with his elbows as he powered through toward what he wanted.

  Too bad it looked like he wouldn’t want Dayton anymore.

  Dayton made himself move, even though the only thing he wanted was to curl up under all the comforters and blankets he owned. He managed to pack, even though little things would have to stay behind for lack of space in the car, and some stuff he could only fit into plastic bags because he’d never traveled and had no luggage.

  To think that just hours ago he’d been enthusiastic and hopeful for the future, only to have the ground ripped out from under his feet. And now Max knew just how deceived he’d been. Dayton bet Max felt he’d wasted time here.

  Dayton was such a waste of space.

  When Max came back, Dayton had already packed most of the bags into his car, and was sitting on the bed, nervously petting Cinnamon.

  “I got this box for him,” Max said, avoiding Dayton’s eyes like the Plague. “It’s gonna be better than the other one.”

  Dayton swallowed, hugging his cat almost too tightly. “Thank you.”

  “We can stay at Kathy’s for a few days until we work out what to do next. Worst case scenario, we can have free storage at hers for a bit longer.”

  Dayton looked up, taking a deep breath of air. “Seriously? She’s letting us stay at hers?” Clearly, Max had managed to become better acquainted with her within a few weeks than Dayton had throughout three years of them working together.

  “Yeah, it’s just an air mattress, but it comes with a roof over our heads.” Max approached, but just when Dayton thought he’d get a comforting touch, Max took Cinnamon out of his arms.

  Dayton swallowed and hugged himself. “That’s so kind of her,” he said, not knowing what to do with the awkwardness of their interactions anymore. He couldn’t believe what a spectacular failure this night had turned out to be. Especially since it had been supposed to be the crowning glory of all their efforts, the success they’d been working for so hard.

  Max placed a meowing Cin in the box and stood up to put on a hoodie. “Let’s go. You want me to drive?”

  Dayton looked at his hands, which still felt unstable and weak, and nodded, dragging himself up. When he approached the door, he couldn’t help but look back at the room that had been his home since he was eighteen. Tomorrow, it would be as if he’d never lived here.

  Max wouldn’t say another word to him as he rushed down the stairs with Cin complaining in the box. His shoulders were so set it seemed like they could crack from the tension any minute.

  Were they broken up now? Dayton wasn’t sure. And why was it making him so desperately sad when he’d been the one to suggest they shouldn’t be boyfriends?

  Because he really, really liked Max. It was as if his heart didn’t care how toxic it was for someone like him to be with a confident man like Max. As if it didn’t matter that they would always end up hurting one another. He had fantasized about someone putting an end to his torment, true, but not in this moment, not yet, not at work.

  Maybe he wasn’t fit to have someone to love at all.

  He sat in the wrecked car, which was now filled with all the things he owned, and couldn’t help but contemplate the rust at the hood, completely numb.

  Max started the car all too soon, and Dayton was swept away from the River Inn before he was ready.

  “You gotta make a statement,” Max finally said out of the blue, not sparing Dayton a glance. “You gotta show the bitch that you mean it. I bet she’ll notice how much she needs you and you’ll get your job back by next week.”

  Dayton shuddered, feeling cold even in his warmest hoodie. “I just wish she’d paid me what she owes me. That’s all I want. I don’t want to be here anymore,” he said, watching the trees pass them in the glow of the single headlight.

  “She’ll make a shitload tonight, and she’ll pay you what you’re owed.” Max’s grip on the wheel made his knuckles whiten.

  Guilt choked the life out of Dayton. Even knowing the whole truth, Max was still worried for him and cared about what would happen to him. “I’m sorry.”

  “What are you sorry for?” Max hissed. “It was clearly my fault. As usual. Forget it. I’ll find another job. I’m not going back there to grovel at that two-faced bitch’s feet.”

  Dayton flinched, but he didn’t dare say anything more. Max was right. Nothing could possibly make things right between them, so they drove on in complete silence.

  Kathy lived just fifteen minutes away by car, in a farmhouse that beckoned them with warm light coming through the windows.

  Before they even parked, a young woman walked out and waved at them with a smile. “Hey! Kathy told me you’d be coming.”

  How was Dayton to force a smile to his face when his life was falling apart? The way he always did at the hotel when things were going to shit. The same way he’d politely smiled at Greg’s jokes.

  “Hi. Are you Kathy’s sister?” he asked, composing himself just enough not to make her uncomfortable.

  “Jen. Nice to meet you,” she said, already opening their trunk and taking out some of the plastic bags. “This is so unfair. I’m never eating at the River Inn again.”

  Dayton gave a slow nod, taking as much stuff as he could carry at once. The quicker they were done with this, the quicker he could have a few minutes to himself.

  Max introduced himself to Jen as well but wasn’t very chatty either as he efficiently moved bags from the car to a tiny, empty room with nothing but an air mattress on the floor. Anxiety spiked in Dayton by the second as the reality of being homeless again hit him from every corner.

  Jen offered them food, but they both declined, and Dayton wished he could go for a walk already, far away from Jen’s compassion and Max’s tense shoulders. Maybe now that everything was lost, he could just leave. Just relocate somewhere, because there was no work available locally anyway.

  Dayton didn’t like it at all when he saw Max pull out a balaclava from his bag. Had he already arranged a hook-up to let off some steam and forget his good for nothing ex-boyfriend who couldn’t even go through with the fantasies they both craved so much?

  “Are you meeting someone?” he asked in the end, pulling his hands into the sleeves of his sweater.

  For the first time in what felt like forever their eyes met. “You could say so,” Max grumbled.

  Dayton’s stomach twisted, and he clenched his teeth, hunching forward on the air mattress. “That was quick.”

  Max frowned. “What?” The tiny space in the room was making it hard for Dayton to breathe.

  Dayton swallowed, curling his hands into fists inside his sleeves. “You know what,” he muttered through a barely-open mouth.

  Max’s eyebrows shot up, and he glanced at the balaclava. “Christ! It’s not that. But if it was, what do you care, anyway? You push me away any time a problem comes up, just like you did tonight.”

  Dayton sucked in his lips, stiffening so rapidly his neck ached in response. “Because I do, all right?” he hissed, not wanting to alarm Jen.

  Max chewed on that answer for a while. “Well, it’s not that. I’ve got some unfinished business. Don’t wait up for me.”

  Dayton froze, but then grabbed Max’s forearm as hard as he could. “Please, don’t do anything rash again. She will know if you damage something at the hotel, and you’ll be arrested again...”

  “I won’t be arrested. Stop worrying. Anyway, it won’t be your neck on the line anymore. You’ll have an alibi,” he said grimly, only making Dayton more anxious. “And if I do end up back in jail, you’ll be able to write me letters and everything will be back to the way you want it.”

  Dayton looked away, unable to stand the bitterness in Max’s eyes. He deserved it all. “I don’t. I don’t want that.”

  Max took a deep breath. “Then cross your fingers, and go to sleep. I’ll see you later.”

  Dayton listened to Max closing the door behind him, and only then, when he was absolutely certain he was alone, did he open the box and let out Cinnamon, or at least gave the cat the option of leaving. For now, the feline peeked out, glaring at the unfamiliar walls with wide eyes.

  “I know, Cin,” whispered Dayton. “I know, I’m scared too.”

  Chapter 11

  Dayton had waited long into the night, pretending he was asleep yet unable to let dreams swallow him . Only when he got up to pee did he realize that Max had in fact come back, and that he was sleeping on the sofa in the living room.

  Despite it being he who’d rejected Max, Dayton couldn’t help the all-encompassing feeling of disappointment. A part of him had hoped that Max would slide under the covers on the air mattress and hug him tight so that Dayton could finally fall asleep.

  Without such luck, Dayton spent the night tossing and turning, dissecting a million different scenarios of how his life would go now.

  In the early morning, when he heard people moving about outside his room, he finally rolled out of bed, put on his hoodie, and dared to face the world again.

  At least Cin seemed to be doing fine, as Dayton spotted him on the kitchen table across from Kathy, who ate breakfast with her sister and Max.

  They didn’t see him at first, and Dayton tried to be even quieter, listening to the lively conversation in the cozy space decorated with dried and fresh herbs, and copper pots that Kathy likely actually used.

  “I swear to God,” said Kathy, her mouth full of eggs and bacon. “It was a disaster. Two further servers quit, and Mrs. Hotel Owner herself had to run all the errands. She was hilariously bad at it, apparently. She came to the kitchen to cry.”

 

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