Never too late, p.26
Never Too Late, page 26
“I know what you mean. Thank you, for how you are with him, I mean. I appreciate it. He deserves someone who understands him, someone who’s as gentle as you are with him. Has he…” His face becomes serious. “Spoken anymore about what we spoke about?” His face twists, showing a look that is a mixture of confusion and sadness.
“He hasn’t. I don’t want to push him. I’m scared to mention it, I’ve been waiting for him to bring it up on his own.”
He nods, letting out a deep breath. “Yeah, that’s probably for the best. He hasn’t mentioned it to me either. I just didn't know if he would have done it with you,” he grunts in disagreement.
I know he means well with his brother, he wants to protect him. We both do. But we’re also both aware of how carefully we need to handle this conversation with Dax, too.
“I’m going to go take a walk actually, if you don’t need me here. I have a few things I need to pick up for the house. If you need me, call me and I’ll be right back.”
“Sure, that’s fine. I’ll let him know.” He quickly lifts his head, no longer staring at the papers in front of him, gaining my attention. “Hey, Jae, did you know there’s a florist at the bottom of the street? Bernie’s a regular next door. He’s a nice guy. I think he’d like to talk to someone who knows more about flowers. He’s always trying to get me to talk about them but I have no clue. Not as much as Dax anyway. It might be worth having a pop down to see for yourself.”
“Oh, actually, that sounds great. Thanks, Tyler, I’ll see you soon.” I wave as I turn to walk out of the door.
I inhale sharply, taking in the smell of the ocean as it never ceases to calm me. It’s the opposite of torn down buildings, destruction, and the smell of fire, which I’m more accustomed to. But it helps me remind myself I’m here and I’m safe.
I’m home.
Getting sidetracked from my original purpose to walk the high street, I decided to explore the length of it instead. I’ve lived here for almost three months now and I still haven’t explored the area. Coming towards the end, a muted green building catches my eye. The building itself is similar to others on the high street, with a mediaeval look on the outside complimented by the large green wooden windows and shutters encouraging every person to walk past to come inside to take a look. The atmosphere on the outside is as welcoming as the café, bursting with warmth and life.
Walking inside, flowers of vibrant colours decorate the walls in large pots, bouquets with ribbons are showcased along the counter, and behind stands an older man with grey hair and glasses perched on his nose. He moves to the side when he hears the bell chime from the door opening, revealing the most beautiful bouquet I have ever seen. Pale toned colours of romantic shades complement one another. The mixture of red roses, tulips, and orchids tell a love story on their own. I hesitate for a moment, stopping and staring at the beauty in front of me, wondering if it’s too late to turn around, but remind myself that this is what I want to do now as Jae. Nervously approaching him, I introduce myself.
“Hi, son, how can I help?” he says as he approaches the counter.
“Hi, sir, I’m Jae. I’m fairly new to town.” He removes his glasses and offers me a friendly smile. I continue to talk, now unable to stop. “My partner owns the record shop at the end of the street. I came to work with him today but decided to take a walk around instead. I’ve not explored the whole high street yet, but it's beautiful. I didn’t even know your shop was here. His brother Tyler actually sent me here. I moved into an old farmhouse; it came with a sunflower garden. I haven’t been able to work for a while so I’ve been seeing to it. I actually really like it. It’s different to what I'm used to – my old job. Dax, he’s always loved flowers. I guess you could say his love for them has rubbed off onto me.”
“Oh yes! Dax. I’ve seen the brothers a handful of times when I’ve been in Cee’s. Dax is the one with the tattoos, right? I’ve never been a fan of them myself, but I can appreciate the ones he has. They look like the real thing. I’m Bernie, sorry I didn’t mention this before.”
I’m glad I’m not the only one who appreciates them.
Bernie carries on talking while I walk around the shop on light feet, taking every flower in. I’ve never seen anything like it before, the only place I’ve seen so many flowers is on Dax’s skin, and when we went to see them at the Botanic Gardens. Seeing them so up close, being able to touch the petals, is a completely different experience.
I’m starting to really understand why Dax appreciates them so much.
Bernie walks towards me, gently placing his hand on my shoulder. “You know, Jae, I could use a hand around here. I’m on my own, I don’t have anyone helping out and I’m getting older. You mentioned you’re not working, right?”
“Oh yes, sir. That’s correct.”
“You’re very well mannered,” he says with a smile. “Where did you say you were from?”
“Sorry, I didn’t.” Praying my southern accent makes it obvious where I’m from. “My old job required me to move about a lot. I was based near Chester last.” My palms are instantly starting to get sweaty, the topic of the conversation starting to make me feel uncomfortable. I go to reach my dog tags as I’ve not needed them in a while, and I’m reminded I don’t wear them anymore. They’re protecting Alice. I cough, feeling awkward. “Former military, sir.”
The words steal all of Bernie’s attention from his flowers and he slowly walks around the counter approaching me. “Well I’ll be damned, soldier. Royal Regiment of Wales at your service.” Bernie goes to raise his right hand, bringing his fingers to his forehead when I lean over, pressing a gentle hold on his forearm. “You don’t need to do that.”
Instead, he reaches up to the cap on his head, taking it off and bringing it to his chest.
A different way of showing respect.
“Any soldier is welcome here. You come back whenever you want to, how little and often you want. It feels good to be in the presence of another soldier again.”
“I’d like to take you up on that offer, sir. I mean, Bernie.”
“You know, Jae, you remind me of myself. I never thought this would be where I ended up after the war either. If I'm honest, I’m surprised I made it out alive.” He lets out a shallow grunt. “This here was my sweet Betsy’s shop. She has been my sweetheart ever since I met her at fifteen. I bought it for her. Some of the guys said a bunch of flowers is a way to a girl’s heart and I went and showed them I could do better than that. So, I bought her the whole store.” I notice his face soften, and he walks towards an old black-and-white photo on the wall of a beautiful girl I’m guessing to be in her twenties, outside of the shop. “She always loved flowers. Said they were special; they had the power to say things people couldn’t. Hell, my house was as full of them as it is here.” I notice him starting to lean on the counter, so I quickly run to grab the stool I noticed by the front door, bringing it over helping him to take a seat. His voice turns to sadness. “She started getting sick, real sick. Doctors couldn’t do anything about it. My heart broke the day I lost her, and you know what her last words were to me?” I can’t reply. I try to but the words don’t come out. “Keep the dream alive. For a moment, I was angry, son. I didn’t understand. But this here, this is her dream. And keeping it alive, means a part of her is always with me. We don’t have any children to pass it onto, I just hope one day someone can take over who keeps the same dream alive as I try to do now.”
Quickly wiping away the tears falling from my eyes, Bernie slowly stands up from the stool. “Thank you, son, for listening to a silly old man like me.” He smiles, telling me to follow him to the back room of the florist where he keeps all the fresh flowers before working with them.
Taking my phone out of my pocket, I make sure to send a text telling Dax I’m going to be here for a while. I don’t want to worry him.
And I can’t help but feel excited. Leaving the army left me feeling confused and unsure. But this makes me feel grounded.
I feel as though, maybe, this is what I was meant to do all along.
Chapter fifty
Dax
“I wish I told you every minute of every day, just how much you mean to me.”
“Where did you say Jae had gone?” I ask Ty as I walk into the back room and take a seat onto the chair in front of the computer.
“I didn’t. He just said he was going for a walk to pick some things up, he hasn’t been gone that long, D. He’s an adult. He knows his way around, I’m sure he’ll come back. Anyway, I’m going to go get a coffee, I’ll grab you one.” He tries to joke around with me as he stands to get his jacket from the rack at the side of the door, but I don’t feel amused. I know I shouldn’t worry; I’m trying not to be an overbearing guard dog, but I can’t help myself.
I just need to make sure he’s safe. I’m scared in case something happens again when I’m not there.
If something happens again, I won’t be able to forgive myself.
And thankfully, like clockwork, my phone goes off with a text lighting up my screen.
Jae: I’m not going to be back to the shop for a while. I don’t want to panic you. I’m fine. I’m in the florist with Bernie, we got talking and one thing led to another. He mentioned how he needed a hand in the shop. And I offered. I couldn’t say no. I hope that’s okay. I love you and I miss you x
My shoulders relax after I respond to the message.
He’s okay, everything's okay. He’s down the street. He’s just letting me know he’s okay.
“Hey, lover boy, guess who managed to get away from work so early?” a female voice shouts. And it’s a voice I’m familiar with.
Novah.
I turn in my seat, seeing Novah come into view awkwardly. “Oh, hey, Dax. Sorry. Where’s your brother?” she asks, not wanting to look at me, clearly feeling embarrassed. Understandable.
“Not here.” I reply dryly. “Lover boy?” I arch my brow, questioning.
“Oh yeah, it just slipped out. I was on the phone to a friend.” She awkwardly removes her reading glasses, wiping the lens on her cardigan to avoid giving me any eye contact.
“Sure,” I respond, turning back to the computer.
But as I start tapping on the keyboard, I start to feel doubtful of myself.
Did I come off as rude to Novah? If she’s as close to Ty as I think she is, has he told her? Does she know about me? And if she does, what does she know?
“I’ll go sit on the shop floor; I don’t want to intrude.”
“It’s fine, Novah, really. You can sit down here. Tyler should be back soon. He’s just gone for a coffee.” I offer her a smile.
If there is something going on between the two of them, like I think there is, I don’t want her to hate me.
“Actually, Novah. Would you be able to do something for me? I have a bouquet of flowers ordered at Bernie’s. I can’t go and collect it because Jae’s there right now. Would you be able to collect them for me?” I swing the chair around giving her my full attention.
She looks confused at first, but her face then softens. “Yeah, okay. Sure. If Tyler comes back, are you able to tell him –”
“Yeah, don’t worry. Thank you.”
Before I turn to smile, she’s already out the door and the guilt eats at me more.
Fortunately, the shop door opens not long after Novah goes out the back, with Tyler striding in with two coffee cups in hand.
“Here you go, Daxxy boy,” he says as he puts the paper coffee cup onto the table.
“Thanks, lover boy,” I tease.
He pulls back the coffee cup from his lips, choking from hearing the words I’ve just said, his face turning bright red. I don’t think I’ve seen him as embarrassed as this before and I can’t help but take a moment to soak in this new development.
He slowly takes a seat in his chair beside me, “D, we need to talk about something.” Quickly going back to the coffee, he was sipping.
I arch my brow at his confession. “Do you mean how you’re fucking Novah?”
He chokes again. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I may not pick up on things others would but I'm not stupid, Tyler.”
He lowers the cup, placing it onto the side. “What? Of course you’re not. I never said you are,” he stumbles. “How did you know?”
“I’ve seen the way you look at her, the way she looks at you, I think I’ve known for a while.”
His shoulders start to relax, no longer tensed. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, D. I was confused. What I feel for – what me and Novah have is different to what I’ve had before.” His shoulders start to tense back up. I hear the uncomfortable undertone in his voice. I turn, giving him my full attention. “We both know I had no interest in relationships before. Everyone was just a silly fling to me. I didn’t have the time for anyone. But with her, it’s different.”
I can’t help but feel emotional at his confession. Tyler deserves this more than anyone I know. I’ve noticed the happiness she’s brought to him in such a short amount of time.
“And the boys?” I ask.
“They don’t know yet. We were waiting to tell you first. I just wanted to make sure I was certain of things between us. I never thought I wanted children, you know? It never crossed my mind. But those two boys? I’d give them the world just to see them smile.”
And I know he would, too.
“And you're certain?”
“Yeah, I think so, D. I love her. And the boys too.” His face lights up with pride. I’ve seen him around Theo and Frankie, and you would have to be an idiot not to notice how much he cares for them both.
“Does she know?”
“That I love her?” He lets out a low sigh. “Nope.” He pops the ‘p’ at the end. “I just gotta hope when I do tell her, she loves me back. I guess.”
I press my feet to the floor, pushing them forward one by one, dragging my chair towards him. Putting an arm around his shoulder, I bring him in for a hug. He knows this is one of the only times I’ll accept or be close enough for a hug. When one of us is sad, feeling overwhelmed, or frustrated. I’m not so good with speech, thankfully he’s aware of this. “Love you, brother,” I whisper into his shoulder. He doesn’t reply, but squeezes me harder.
The bells chime as the front door of the shop opens, Novah comes into view with the bouquet of flowers, they’re so beautiful, something in me warms at the idea of giving them to Jae.
“Dax, these are beautiful. Are they for Jae? I saw his mouth watering over them in the store. I had to tell them they were for my sister, he looked so sad about it. I know he’s going to love them.” She puts the flowers on the table towards the back of the room, out of view from the window just in case he so happened to walk past and comes into the shop. “Oh, hey, Tyler. I didn’t see you there.” He abruptly sits up, pulling himself away from me, coughing.
“Is everything okay?” she asks with a concerned look on her face.
“Yeah, fine.” He coughs again, attempting to clear his throat. “Wow, D. Those are some impressive flowers, if they don’t get you laid, I don’t know what else would.”
“Tyler!” Novah scolds. He doesn’t reply, he just shrugs his shoulders and mouths the word sorry.
Interesting.
I stare at the flowers with awe, they’re exactly how I imagined them to be. I’ve spoken to Bernie a handful of times, mostly in Cee’s. He has a similar understanding of flowers as I do. When I ordered the bouquet yesterday while I was ‘going to grab some coffee’ I didn’t explain much about what I wanted because he knew straight away. From what I had seen inside the store, I knew he could create works of art – but I never expected this.
From the corner of my eye, I notice Ty’s face starts to soften. I haven’t seen him look at someone the way I’ve caught him looking at Novah a handful of times. It confused me at first because this is a side to Tyler I’ve never seen before, and up until now didn’t know existed. But the more I see how they’re staring at each other and having silent conversations only they can understand, the more I want this for him.
I just hope she feels the same way, because no one is more deserving of love than him.
“They’re perfect, Dax. He’s going to love them.” I hear Tyler’s voice to the side of me, “Roses, tulips and orchids, deep love, new beginnings, and beauty, right?”
“You’re getting good.”
“I’ve learnt from the best.” He walks towards them, making sure not to touch, but inhaling the floral scent coming from them. “What are you going to do with them?”
“Show Jae exactly what he means to me.” I beam. “If you’re all covered here, am I able to go home, I’ll leave you two to it. I know you’re in safe hands.”
“Yeah. If you need anything, call me, yeah?” he asks as he prods my shoulder with his finger.
I smile back at him with a nod. With me coming to work today with Jae in his car, I need to make my own way back to the house. I didn’t want to ask Ty, so I decide to get the bus back. With only three minutes left until one is due, I pull my phone out of my jean pocket and send Jae a text.
Dax: I’ve gone back to the house, don’t worry, I’m fine. Don’t feel the need to rush, but please come home as soon as you’re finished. I owe you a date.
Home.
Chapter fifty-one
Dax
“I’m coming home, pretty boy. I’m coming back to you.”
Behind Jae’s house lies an open field guarded by similar green trees to the ones out front – tall oak trees with different shades of green coming from the branches. I’ve spent the last week sneaking out to ensure I’d be able to wrap lights around them the way I wanted, the exact image in my head. Ty has been in on the plan too; he came to wrap them around the trees yesterday while me and Jae were in the shop. He, at first, smirked at the idea but as always, he didn’t question it. When we both saw it come to life, I didn’t need to explain for him to understand. He saw the beauty for himself.
