Never too late, p.1
Never Too Late, page 1
Copyright © V Wynters 2024
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or used in any matter without written permission of the copyright owner except for the use of quotations in a book review.
First Edition, 2024
ISBN: 9781836540069
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the authors imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or places are entirely coincidental.
No AI was used to create this book or cover.
Book cover design by Dream Echo Designs
Editing by Between The Covers Editorial
Formatting by V Wynters
For those who grew up knowing they were different and didn't understand why, I see you.
For those who struggled and felt no one heard their voice, I hear you.
And for those who stick by another person's side, and love them no matter what, I appreciate you.
This one's for us.
Before Reading
Thank you for picking up Never Too Late and being interested in Dax and Jae’s story. This is the first book of an interconnected series and can be read alone.
Within this story (and series), you will be introduced to two characters with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Both have similarities but are still very different from one another in many ways. I would like to stress, everyone who is neurodivergent is different. We may have different stims, different special interests, and we may react to things differently. But we also may do things the same. And that’s okay. It’s also okay if you or someone you know do things differently or the same too.
That’s the beauty with everyone as individuals whether we are neurodivergent or not, we are all different and we’re all unique.
And for those who relate to either of these characters or any others within this story, I see you, I hear you, you’re not alone.
Please note, this book contains dark elements including themes which some may find difficult to read. A detailed content list is at the back of the book and if you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact me on Instagram or email, authorvwynters@gmail.com
Your mental health matters.
Playlist
In The Cards – Jamie Miller
Overwhelmed (Ryan Mack Remix) – Ryan Mack
Let Me Down Slowly – Alec Benjamin
Hear You Me – Jimmy Eat World
If It Means A Lot To You – A Day To Remember
Follow You – Bring Me The Horizon
All I Wanted – Paramore
Airplanes (feat. Hayley Williams of Paramore) – B.o.B, Hayley Williams
Landmines – Sum 41
Faint – Linkin Park
First Date – Blink 182
Adrenaline – You Me At Six
I'm Not Okay (I Promise) – My Chemical Romance
Dying For – Rain City Drive
A Part Of Me (feat. Laura Whiteside) – Neck Deep
Over My Head (Cable Car) – A Day To Remember
Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God) – Lø Spirit
Ghost Of You – 5 Seconds Of Summer
Have Faith In Me – A Day To Remember
Numb – Abe Parker
Jealous – Labrinth
Stay With Me (Acoustic Version) – You Me At Six
Everlong – Foo Fighters
Miss Missing You – Fall Out Boy
Ocean Eyes – Billie Eilish
Greedy – Our Last Night
I Think I'm OKAY (with YUNGBLUD & Travis Barker) – mgk, YUNGBLUD, Trvis Barker
Masterpiece – Motionless In White
The Reason – Hoobastank
Train Wreck – James Arthur
What A Time (feat. Niall Horan) – Julia Michaels, Niall Horan
The Night We Met – Lord Huron
Home – Gabrielle Aplin
Meet you at the Graveyard – Cleffy
TALK ME DOWN – Troye Sivan
Stargazing – Myles Smith
Pavement – SayWeCanFly
Afterlife – Holding Absence
Talk To A Friend – Rain City Drive
Loser – Sueco
Chokehold – Sleep Token
Last Resort (Reimagined) – Falling In Reverse
Shelter (feat. Avril Lavigne) – MOD SUN, Avril Lavigne
Memory – Sugarcult
Yellow – Coldplay
In The Stars – Ben Boone
Are You Really Okay? – Sleep Token
Good Enough – Lø Spirit
Touch – Sleeping At Last
LosT – Bring Me The Horizon
Welcome To My Life – Simple Plan
Leave a Light On – Tom Walker
Contents
Prologue
1. Dax
2. Dax
3. Jae
4. Jae
5. Jae
6. Jae
7. Jae
8. Dax
9. Jae
10. Jae
11. Dax
12. Dax
13. Jae
14. Jae
15. Jae
16. Dax
17. Dax
18. Jae
19. Dax
20. Jae
21. Dax
22. Dax
23. Dax
24. Dax
25. Jae
26. Dax
27. Jae
28. Dax
29. Jae
30. Dax
31. Jae
32. Jae
33. Dax
34. Jae
35. Jae
36. Dax
37. Jae
38. Dax
39. Jae
40. Dax
41. Jae
42. Jae
43. Dax
44. Jae
45. Dax
46. Dax
47. Jae
48. Dax
49. Jae
50. Dax
51. Dax
52. Dax
53. Jae
54. Dax
55. Jae
56. Dax
57. Dax
58. Jae
Acknowledgments
Content Warnings
About the Author
Other works from V Wynters
Prologue
Dax
Sixteen years old.
Growing up, there were times when I would wish there was more than me, my brother, and Mum.
I know I may sound ungrateful, but I don’t mean to be.
Life has always been easy, sure, and I never took either of them for granted.
But even though the three of us is all I’ve ever known, I felt as though a piece of me was missing, which I never truly understood.
I have finally left high school and couldn’t be happier about it. College and university are something I’ve dreamed of and can now finally, hopefully, make both wishes into a reality.
For as long as I can remember, I have always struggled to be around others. I’ve often felt misunderstood, and I’ve felt others did whatever they could to avoid me.
I was ten years old when I really started to enjoy music, quickly noticing how much it became an outlet for me and my emotions. Over time, I realised how much I connected with artists and their lyrics. And the more I listened, the more I was thankful they had the power to explain things I didn’t know how to explain myself. I felt as though I wasn’t alone, that someone understood the way I saw the world and the way things made me feel. Mum noticed how much joy music brought me, also observing how often I stole my brother’s Walkman, and for my birthday that year, she bought me my own. It wasn’t anything flashy, it was secondhand, but that didn’t matter to me. I cherished it more than I had ever cherished anything before. I can remember the moment I unwrapped it and the way Mum’s eyes filled with tears of love and joy when she saw how excited I was, as though it was yesterday. It became a part of me, attached. I never left the house without it, or my room, in fact.
“I have never seen you more alive,” she praised.
And I agree with that too.
When I was around fourteen years old, doctors told her I had depression. I think that was the day I saw her heart break, and I don’t think I have truly been able to forgive myself for it since. Even though I feared doctors, scared of what they would say, the moment she told me she felt it was for the best for me to go, I forced myself to. To get better.
For me, and for her.
Deep down, I think I had an idea of what the doctors would say all along. I’d noticed the looks I got from other students, and I’d heard what they whispered in the hallways. I was branded the ‘depressed loner boy’ by others, and they threw it at me any chance they got. No matter how hard I tried to hide that I was affected by this, it sunk deeper down than I intended.
After getting an official diagnosis, Mum, Tyler, and the teachers around me started to change. I guess I should be thankful for it, but it left me feeling more like an outsider than I had previously.
And that's what I hated the most.
Tyler, my brother, is four years older than me. We aren’t the closest. You could compare us to cats and dogs, but I wouldn’t think too much about it, he’s just a dick. He’s your typical ‘guy everyone wants to know, the guy everyone wants to be around.’ Whereas you could call me an outcast. We don’t have much in common and we don’t really talk. Unless we have to. Which is why we try to avoid each other as much as possible.
< br /> Mum, on the other hand, has been my best friend my entire life. She's hard-working, strong, and beautiful. I wouldn’t know life without her. I never knew my father growing up, nor have I ever had the desire to. She was twice the father he could have ever been, and I often found myself thankful he wasn’t interested in the first place.
“So, D, now you’ve left school – you going to get a job? You know, pull your weight?” Tyler drawls from behind me as he walks into the kitchen. Turning to face him, I slowly trail my eyes up and down his body, assessing the attire he’s chosen to wear. It looks as though he’s just walked out of an 80s music video. He must have just returned from the gym, as I didn’t hear him walk in.
I zone out completely after hearing those words come from his mouth, unsure of how to reply. It isn’t until I hear the clang of the bottle he’s drinking from hit the table that I come back around.
“Tyler, he left school last week. Leave him alone. We’re okay,” Mum instantly scolds, jumping straight in to defend me from the fucker himself.
“I know that, Mum. But there are three of us, I was just asking. You won’t have to work so much then. Get some time off, have time to relax. You deserve it.”
“I don’t need to relax, and I don’t need time off, Ty, I enjoy working, I enjoy being busy. You two are older now, and in a few years, you may be gone for good. Let me do what I can before you flee the nest and forget about me, okay?” she says as she puts a fresh bouquet of flowers into the vase in the middle of the table. My eyes instantly wander towards them, taking in their colours and floral smell, blocking out my brother beside me.
“Forget about you? I could never do that, Mum. If it was up to me, I’d never leave.” He beams.
The sound of her laughter fills the kitchen as she lightly taps his shoulder in protest. “You are something else, Tyler Whitmore. I hope you treat your ladies with more respect.”
“I’d never leave you either, Mum,” I whisper, quietly enough for only the two of us to hear my confession.
“I know, baby. And that’s exactly why you need to. Get out there, see the world. Meet new people. Explore. Fall in love. You know, everything in those cheesy love films your brother always watches and thinks we don’t notice?” She winks.
“I want to help, Mum. I can help. I’ll start looking.”
“Don’t overwork yourself too much. You’ve just got some freedom before you start college. If you really want to work, maybe get a weekend job, why not at a café or something?”
“D at a café? The guy’s got two left feet. I don’t think that’s on the menu,” Tyler replies in hysterics.
“Ha ha, very funny,” I deadpan. “Why are you home, anyway? Don’t you have a date to attend or have girls finally realised how annoying you are?”
“Boys! We’re all home for dinner. Let’s be nice to each other, please. This is a rare opportunity. Gods, you’re more alike than you think. No wonder you argue so much.”
“Yeah, whatever, Mum. He’s just jealous that I’m cooler than him.” He jabs me in the ribs playfully in response. “Anyway, what are you cooking? Need me to make something?”
“Dinner should be any moment now.”
The doorbell rings.
“Pizza time!” Mum shouts while wiping her hands with a kitchen towel, quickly making her way towards the front door.
“Yum!” me and Ty both shout in unison.
As Mum quickly closes the door and retreats towards the table, she raises a brow, laughing while she gives us an unfamiliar look as she places the boxes down.
Okay, maybe we do have more in common with one another than we thought.
It has been several weeks since we started our new tradition. Friday nights are no longer a night where I lock myself away in my room, but instead have become a night of laughter, movies, and good food. Tyler’s date nights can wait – much to his dismay.
And on the plus side, I’m learning to tolerate him more. And just like Mum said, we aren’t as different from one another after all.
I glance over towards Mum and Tyler as I see them sharing a bowl of popcorn, and I can’t help but have a smile on my face.
I can only wish we had started this tradition earlier. But better late than never. Right?
My smile is still in place when he turns his head in my direction. Looking confused, he throws a handful of popcorn towards me before he notices Mum has fallen asleep against his shoulder.
Slowly moving her head to the side, he carefully ensures she is laid comfortably with a blanket over top, while I turn off the tv and the larger light, praying not to disturb her from her peaceful slumber.
Tiptoeing towards her, I’m careful not to make a sound. I lightly press a kiss to her forehead and step back, watching Tyler do the same.
After checking the doors are locked and all lights are switched off downstairs, we quietly make our way upstairs to our bedrooms, side by side. Before departing in opposite directions, I hear Tyler mumble something.
“You know, you’re not bad company.” He smiles.
I return his smile with one of my own. “You know, you’re not either. Who’d have thought?”
“Punk,” he sniggers while opening his door before quickly turning to face me once more. “Goodnight, D.”
“Night, Ty.”
And within moments of crawling into bed, I fall asleep, feeling the happiest I have in the longest time.
Another Friday rolls around before I know it. Finding a job hasn’t been as easy as I thought it would be. No one has called me back or given me a chance. It hasn’t been the best for my self-esteem and has resulted in me feeling more hopeless than usual, so tonight is exactly what I need to take my mind off things.
Hopefully one of the scratch cards I’ve purchased as a weekly tradition allows us to win some money so I don’t have to keep applying and getting rejected much longer.
It reaches six o’clock, and even though Friday pizza nights are fairly new to us, we’ve gotten used to meeting at this time in the kitchen, waiting for the food to arrive. Both me and Ty have begged Mum to allow us to take over and arrange the night for her, but she’s turned the offer down each time, saying it’s her one night to plan something nice for us, so we have to allow her to do it.
Stubborn.
We both know where we got that from.
“Hey, where’s Mum at? Is pizza arriving soon? I’m starving,” Tyler asks as he walks into the kitchen.
“I’m not sure. I haven’t seen her.” He pauses as I notice the look of confusion take over his face. “I haven’t seen her since this morning.” My voice trembles as I reply, my stomach cramping with nerves.
“Huh, that’s odd. I haven’t either,” Tyler replies, now concerned.
I quickly grab my phone and start to dial Mum’s number. It’s not unusual for her to pick up an extra shift at work, but she always makes sure we know in advance.
When she doesn’t answer, I hurriedly redial her number.
Come on, please, pick up. Pick up.
Straight to voicemail.
Tyler starts to speak, and I notice his voice starting to tremble too. “I’m sure everything’s okay. She’s probably just picked up another shift and her phone died. You know she can be forgetful sometimes. You sit tight, I’ll order the pizzas. I’m sure she’ll be back by the time they come.”
I nod. Unsure of anything else to do or say right now. “Yeah, okay. Cool. I’ll go put a film on for us.” My feet feel heavy as I start to walk towards the television in the living room.
“Cool,” Tyler replies, forcing a smile, probably for my sake.
Time goes by slowly, but before we know it, it’s nine o’clock. Three hours after Mum should have met us in the kitchen.
Both of us have tried Mum’s phone multiple times, all going straight to voicemail.
We’ve glanced at our phones continuously, not paying attention to the film in the background. Both too sick to focus, both too worried to concentrate.
I don't know what else we can do.
Three hours.
Without a thought, I start biting into my lip. It isn’t until I can taste the blood on my tongue that I realise what I’ve done. I ignore the metallic taste in my mouth, tapping on my knee, focusing on the bouncing.
Focusing on anything and everything else I can right now.
We both jump at the noise of the movie going back to the main menu as music starts to play, causing Tyler to swiftly stand, starting to pace back and forth frantically, clutching his phone in a death grip. I’m surprised it hasn’t broken.
