Chasing us, p.10
Chasing Us, page 10
I stared into his eyes, trying to find any sign that he was lying to me. The deeper I looked, the more desire and love I found staring back at me. I could try to fight what was brewing between Brandon and I, but why? Even if he were just messing with my head, I needed to hear his words. I needed to feel his hands on me, if only to comfort my wounded heart. I didn’t care about the pain that tomorrow might bring. Right now, in this moment, I needed Brandon.
“I just don’t understand why now; you decide to tell me all of this. Especially when you could have anyone you wanted. I am not the type of girl you want or need. You go for girls that are sexy and daring and way more experienced than I am. There can’t possibly be anything about me that you find appealing. Are you messing with me or something?” I asked again, my voice full of uncertain concern. In my mind, I couldn’t comprehend how anyone like Brandon would want someone as plain as me.
“Are you serious?” Brandon screamed as he threw his hands in the air. Frustration surrounded him like a misty smoke and I could barely see through the haze. “Have you not heard a damn word I have said?”
“Yes,” I yelled back. “I have heard every single word you have said, but I have also seen the other girls you have been with. They are beautiful and sexy and very different from me.” It was true, I had never thought of myself as beautiful and definitely not sexy. Don’t get me wrong, I am not some prude old grandma who wears turtlenecks and is afraid of being intimate.
Stepping closer to him, I could feel Brandon’s warm breath on my neck. My body tingled from his closeness and part of me wanted to reach out and draw him closer. As he opened his mouth to speak, his eyes drove into mine and I couldn’t look away from the intense gaze. “I have always wanted you. It’s always been you... even before I knew you. It was always you. Our souls have been together before we were even able to recognize this attraction. You were meant for me and I refuse to stop us from being together because you are afraid.”
I tried to speak, but I couldn’t form any words to say. My heart was calling out to him and I know he could feel the sparks flying between us. As much as I wanted to fight my feelings for Brandon, I knew I wasn’t strong enough to fight him anymore. He was right. What was growing between us, was always there. I just think I was either too naive or blind to the emotion to see it.
“I can’t stay away from you. I need to kiss you again- to feel that heart stopping moment I have dreamed about for years,” he whispered as his eyes never left mine.
“Then do it,” I said, my voice barely audible. My body was shaking and heat was flowing through my veins like lava. I was giving in to every need, every word, and every desire that was running through my body.
Placing his hands on my hips, Brandon brought me in closer to him. He trailed his lips against my neck as I allowed my head to fall back and a slight moan to escape from my lips.
“I have to tell you, though, I’m afraid that once I get inside of you, that once I have a taste of you, I will never be able to get enough of you,” Brandon whispered as his lips began to tease my body. He began to place tiny kisses along my jawline and down the most sensitive region of my neck; nibbling and licking my skin as if I were a tasty treat. He soon began worshiping every inch of my body with his large hands as his movements moved further and further down my neck and to my shoulders and finally to my taut and perky breasts. Watching me carefully, Brandon’s eyes were trained on mine as his fingers began teasing my hard nipples. Carefully, he circled each one with his fingers as he playfully pulled and caressed them. Biting my lip, I struggled to find air as I enjoyed every sensual moment.
Breathing heavily, I placed my hands in his hair as his lips trailed along my collarbone and toward my breasts where his fingers were moving in slow, but fluid motions. The feeling of Brandon on me was intoxicating and I was now addicted to his touch. “Brandon, I need you,” I whispered as I felt as though I was experiencing something heavenly.
Without warning, Brandon pulled my dress up and over my head and in an even more quick and impressive movement, he removed my black lace bra and threw it behind him. He took one of my breasts in his hand and then moved his mouth to the other, lightly licking and sucking my tit. His tongue danced in circles around my exposed nipples as he moved from sucking to nibbling. The feeling was almost more than I could handle. I let my head fall back again as a loud moan escaped from my quivering lips.
“Shit, you are so fucking hot,” Brandon growled as he watched my hair fall all around my face. Licking my lips, I was hungry for his touch.
Without warning, Brandon’s lips crushed into mine, and sparks of electricity shot throughout my body. My legs went numb and the heat radiating from my body could have sparked a wildfire. His tongue pushed open my lips and invaded my mouth. The smell of his sweet and musky scent made me delirious as his tongue danced along with mine. I wrapped my hands around his waist and pulled him even closer to me. There wasn’t anything between us now, except for the few layers left of our pesky clothes that were a barrier to the touch I so desperately craved.
Brandon’s hands began to roam my body with an eagerness and lust that couldn’t be controlled. I thrust my tongue into his mouth and I heard a slight growl escape from his juicy lips. Holy shit, this was the hottest kiss of my life. As I allowed my body to be taken over by Brandon, I pushed away any fears of heartache and decided to just enjoy this moment while it lasted. I had only been with one other man in my life but we had never reached this level of intimacy. Tonight, I would change that as I would allow Brandon to take something from me I had been keeping for someone very special.
Realizing I was exposed in front of him, I suddenly needed him to be naked too. I wanted, no needed, no craved, to see him. All of him.
I began to tug on his shirt as his hands roamed to the hem of my panties. Stopping briefly, Brandon looked down at me and smiled. “Are you sure about this?” he asked, breathless. “I don’t want you doing anything you aren’t ready for.”
Nodding my head yes, I allowed that to confirm that I wanted him as desperately as he wanted me. “I want this,” I said. Kissing me again, Brandon began to walk us backward toward the large bed in the room. I felt myself crash onto the mattress as Brandon’s tight body fell on top of me.
In an instant, my black panties and boots were off and I was quickly aware that all that was left between us were his boxers that displayed his large and might I add; beautiful erection. With his lips and hands moving in unison all over my body, I allowed another moan to escape from my lips. I wanted to scream and yell and shout out with pleasure what this man was doing to me, but I knew those sounds would come soon enough. I arched my back and threw my head back as his lips trailed down my neck and his legs moved mine apart. One hand continued to rub and tease my now aching breasts while the other slipped into the wetness between my legs.
“Fuck, you are so wet,” Brandon sighed as a dangerous smile crept onto his face.
“Who made me wet?” I asked in a seductive voice I hoped would send him over the edge. I had never said anything like that before to a man, and I was surprised at how natural it felt as I said it to Brandon.
“Oh. My. God.” Brandon almost whimpered as he looked down at me with such lust and need, I almost came right then and there.
Rubbing his fingers along my opening, Brandon began to circle my clit. With one finger, he began a taunting and evil movement that caused my whole body to tighten. I was fighting my own release as I tried to hold back and enjoy the moment a little longer. Slipping two fingers inside me, Brandon began a fluid motion of moving in and out of me, then stopping and circling inside as he reached for my G-spot.
As a loud moan began to escape, I felt the release as Brandon’s fingers moved in and out of me vigorously continuing his little pattern of mind-blowing sensations.
“I have wanted to hear you moan like that for so long,” he growled between kisses. “I have waited for this heart-stopping moment for years.” His lips continued to trail to my bare breasts and as I reached my glorious climax, Brandon only smiled and offered a slight laugh. He wasn’t done with me yet and I reveled in that thought.
Removing his fingers, Brandon sat up on his knees as I tried to catch my breath. Looking up at him, Brandon took the two fingers that he had just had deep inside of me, and placed them inside his mouth. Licking the taste of me, I bit down on my lip as I suddenly became overcome with a painful desire. Holy fuck that was the hottest damn thing I had ever witnessed in my life.
Reaching out my hands, I slipped off his boxers, my fingers trailing along the sides of his tight skin and grabbed his waist as he slowly climbed back on top of me. Looking down at me with such love in his eyes, I knew that this moment was perfect.
“Are you sure?” he asked again as he hovered his body over mine. The veins in his arms were bulging as he held his weight up.
Nodding my head yes, I moved my hips up and invited him to take me. Slowly sliding inside of me, I felt my walls open and flex as Brandon’s cock entered me. Letting his head drop, Brandon smiled at me as the pleasure sparked on his face.
“You are so tight,” he said, almost as if he were surprised.
Every inch of him consumed me and I was sure he would thrust himself into me, in a rage of sexual desire. From the way he had just fucked me with his fingers, I was expecting him to be rough with me. However, he chose to take his time as he delicately moved inside of me. Each thrust filled me completely but yet caressed me in a way that had me writhing in pure delight. I could feel him reaching deeper inside me with every inch of his rock hard and gloriously endowed cock and I could feel me reaching my second climax.
The way our bodies collided and moved as if in synch brought me to another level that no high could ever reach. The act alone felt like we were dancing to a sexual and sensual tune created by our needy bodies and souls. Never in my life had I felt so aroused and yet craved more and more. I felt as if I would explode if I didn’t get more of him. My hands tightened around his waist as I continued to pull him closer. I could feel myself reaching the height of our song and as I let out a loud yell, I allowed my body to release and reach my climax for the third time. Pure adrenaline shot through me as Brandon felt my release and continued our song of desire. As he continued to move inside of me, I could feel him inching his way toward the final note of our tune. Pulling out of me, Brandon let out a growl as he came on the bed beside me. Placing soft kisses along my cheeks and lips, Brandon smiled down at me as we both tried to calm our beating hearts.
“That was amazing,” he smiled as he lay down beside me, turning his head so we were facing.
Smiling, I ran my hand through his messy hair and laughed. “Yes, that was amazing.”
“We have to do that again,” he said. “And about a million times after that too,” he continued with a wicked grin appearing on his lips. “I can’t believe it took this long for me to finally have you.”
I smiled again thinking about how many times I had felt guilty for loving that amazing and naughty smile of his. Now, I could enjoy it. For how long, I wasn’t sure, but tonight wasn’t about worrying about tomorrow.
“Well, that is your fault. This could have happened three years ago had you grown a pair of balls and told me how you felt,” I joked back, offering a smile.
Sitting up, Brandon laughed and pulled me against him. “Of course you would make a smart ass joke after having sex,” he mused. “That is one of the things I love about you,” he said, this time all the teasing left his voice.
My body froze as he wrapped his arms around mine. Did I just hear him right? He loved me? No, this was getting out of control. I wasn’t sure when our world had spiraled out of control. No that was a lie. I knew exactly when everything became blurred and out of control. The moment Brandon touched me. The moment our eyes met for the first time. The moment he showed compassion for me, I knew that I was somehow lost in him but I was now being brought back into the realm of sanity and realization struck me like a blow to the head. I had just made love to Brandon. I wasn’t even dating him; that’s not the type of girl I am. I just ended an engagement with his best friend. Plus, he just confessed his love for me. I think?
What the hell is going on?
Still wrapped in his embrace, I felt my heart dropping in my chest. I wasn’t ready for this. Sure, I had wanted one amazing and wild night with him, and I definitely got my wish, but this was more than I could handle right now. I left Shady Oaks to find myself. I have dreams and hopes and a need to grow stronger after Jamie. Brandon being here with me is only going to complicate that. I can’t do this; not to Brandon and not to myself.
In that moment, I realized what I had to do. I would allow Brandon and me to enjoy our night together. Tomorrow, I would be gone and back to moving forward with my plan. As much as it would break both of our hearts, I had to find myself before I could ever love again.
Chapter 10
Waking, I felt Brandon’s arm stretched across my bare chest. The warmth radiating from him made me want to snuggle closer to his body, but instead, I slowly rolled out of his embrace. Reaching around the room, I searched quietly for my clothes. I had spent most of the night trying to talk myself out of leaving today. I knew what I was about to do would hurt Brandon and would absolutely devastate me, but I really didn’t have a choice anymore.
Jamie had been calling my cell phone non-stop and part of me felt like I owed it to both him and our relationship to hear him out. Brandon was an amazing guy, but I wasn’t what he needed. Brandon deserved a girl as carefree and fun as he is. Someone who could just run away from her life and fall into his rock star lifestyle. As much as I wished I could be that girl, I just wasn’t her. I wanted a suburban lifestyle with a steady career income and kids and a husband. Being with Brandon meant constantly fighting off women throwing themselves at him and never having the dream life I had wanted my entire life. I wasn’t about to compete with another woman for his attention. After spending most of the night devising a plan, I had decided I would dress in the first thing I could find in my bag then head out and get on a bus to the next town. I would continue my journey, but I would go alone.
Looking over at Brandon one last time, I struggled to get my jeans on as I crept to the hotel door. Just as my hand reached for the knob, I heard Brandon begin to move around in our bed.
“What are you doing?” he asked, his voice full of confusion as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.
Closing my eyes, I cringed as I attempted to create a lie that would make him believe I wasn’t about to leave him after our amazing night together. Taking a deep breath, I turned around and tried to hide the pain coursing throughout my body.
“Good morning,” I said in my fake cheerful voice.
Looking at me with a strange expression, Brandon sat up. “What are you doing?” he asked again.
“I uh...” I tried to form a sentence but nothing seemed to come alive.
I stood paralyzed, unable to say anything that would take the pain away. Throwing the covers away from his bare body, Brandon stood and slowly walked toward me like a predator reaching his prey. “You were leaving,” he stated more as a fact than a question.
My breath was trapped and I suddenly felt lightheaded from the lack of oxygen I was allowing in my brain. Once again, my mouth opened but only a quiet stutter escaped.
Reaching me, Brandon stood only inches away from me and I could feel his warmth. My eyes were fixed on the floor as I knew I couldn’t look at him.
“Answer me,” he said as he took his hands and cupped my face. “Leigh, why would you leave?” he asked, forcing me to look at him.
Tears filled my eyes as I desperately wanted to pull him closer and kiss him and tell him this was all a misunderstanding. But, I couldn’t and wouldn't lie to Brandon. “I didn’t know what else to do,” I admitted, fearing how he would react once he knew for certain that I had planned on leaving while he was still sleeping.
“Why would you need to leave?” he began. His voice rose as his eyes still focused on mine, forcing me to speak the truth and look deep into my soul. “After what we experienced last night...I thought you felt the same,” he said, his voice breaking from the hurt of knowing what I was doing. “I care about you and not just because we have known each other for years, but because of who you are.”
This was more than I could take. Each word he spoke felt like a knife being jabbed deeper and deeper into my gut. I couldn’t let Brandon think that what had happened last night wasn’t a mind blowing and universe altering experience for me. I couldn’t let him believe for even one second that I didn’t catch myself falling for him as our bodies were bound together through an intense and spiritual experience.
Placing my hands on his, that were still cupping my face, I made sure Brandon felt the electricity flowing through my body as I thought about last night. “Brandon, what happened last night was incredible. I didn’t plan for that to happen, and I am sure you didn’t either, but it was absolutely amazing. What we experienced was something more spiritual and intense than anything I have ever felt before. But...” My voice trailed off as I tried to muster the courage to explain the rest.
Patiently waiting, Brandon allowed me the time I needed to catch my breath and find the words I so desperately needed to say.
“Leigh, it’s ok. You can tell me anything,” Brandon assured me with a comforting smile as he gently rubbed my back.
