Chasing us, p.11
Chasing Us, page 11
“I had to leave without seeing you today. I feel something when I am with you that I have never felt before, and that terrifies me to my core. With Jamie, I was the person who I know I was supposed to be. With Jamie, I could have the suburban life and family that I am destined to have. With you, Brandon, I feel like I am finally alive and I am living a dream life. Living on the road and watching you play and follow your dream is exhilarating, but it is not reality. Jamie got tired of me and we lived a simple life. I don’t think I could handle you leaving me when you realize the beautiful girls that throw themselves at you at each of your concerts are better than me. Once this trip ends, you will see I am boring and nothing like the fun girl on the road trip with you. I don’t think I could handle that type of heartbreak. So, I decided to run and protect my heart from the ending we both know is eventually coming.”
I allowed myself to sink back as I felt the rush of air after I finished spilling my words. I knew what I had just said was the honest truth, but it was hard and hurtful too.
Without warning, Brandon crushed his lips to mine as he pushed my body forcibly against the hotel room door I was just about to walk through. His tongue parted my lips and invaded my mouth as he pushed his body against mine. Kissing him back, I ran my hands over his strong biceps and down his abdomen. This was so wrong, but at the same time, so right.
After a few minutes, Brandon backed away and I had to lean against the door to support my body as my legs were trembling beneath me.
“You are not leaving,” Brandon stated as he stood towering over me. He was so hot as he took charge and growled. “You are not boring. You are not just some girl I am hooking up with until someone better comes along. There is no one better; you are it for me. I have waited years to have you, to make my move and make you mine. Now that I have my chance, I am not letting you go because you are scared.”
“Brandon, this is crazy. Going after our dreams like this is crazy,” I said, holding myself up against the door.
“Why?” he shouted, causing me to grow a little fearful. Throwing his hands in the air, Brandon turned and walked away before swiftly turning right back around to face me. “Just because you think your life is supposed to be some cookie cutter way, doesn't mean that what we are doing is wrong. We are going for our dreams. Do you know how many people dream of following their hearts and finding what we have? And you just want to throw it away because you are scared? No!” he shouted again. “That’s bullshit and you know that.”
Rage exuded from him and though I should have been frightened, I wasn’t.
“We are doing this,” he continued. “We are going to finish our road trip once we both find what we were looking for. And, we are doing it together because you want me and I want you. The girl you just described doesn't exist. The Leigh I know is brave and fearless and determined. I refuse to let you give up and go home because you think I don’t want you. I will spend the rest of my life proving to you that I want you, but you will not give up on us or on you,” he finished as his chest was rapidly moving up and down. His anger flowed from him like lava and it was undoubtedly the hottest thing I had ever witnessed before in my life.
“What if we ruin our friendship? What if this doesn’t work and everything we have worked so hard for, to maintain, implodes?” I asked, tears now streaming down my face.
Running his hands through his hair, Brandon let out a deep sigh. “What if this works? What if everything we have ever wanted comes true and we get to experience a magical love along the ride?” he asked, his body standing tall and powerful, dominating everything in the room.
Pushing myself away from the door, I rushed toward Brandon and jumped into his arms, throwing my legs around his waist as I passionately kissed him with every ounce of love and need I had in my body. I had been so afraid that Brandon would wake up today and realize that what we had done, that our mind blowing sex had been one big mistake. Instead, though, I realized that Brandon’s feelings for me were far from a crush between friends. His feelings were more than a sexual desire. What Brandon felt for me was an intense need to be with the person who you craved and desired. I knew this because this was exactly how I found myself feeling about him.
He was right, I was afraid and I was running from a scenario I had built up in my mind. So what if we were doing something others thought was crazy or wrong? We were doing what we wanted, following our dreams and seeing where we could go together. That thought alone made me shudder, as I knew I almost gave up two of the biggest things in my life, Brandon and my dreams.
Brandon trailed a finger along my cheek as he began to wipe away my tears. “I promise, this will be the last time you cry with me,” he said. “I will make sure you are happy every day you spend with me,” he finished.
Holding on to me tight, Brandon fell onto the bed and began to help me relive our experience last night, over and over again.
***
Later that evening, after we had spent several hours in bed proving to one another that we were in fact, going to remain together on this insane journey, Brandon had gone out for a quick run. While sitting alone in the room, I had decided to give Kylie a call. Answering after the first ring, I heard a voice I hadn’t known I would miss until she said hello.
“Leigh, why haven’t you called me sooner?” Kylie yelled into the phone.
“Hello to you too,” I laughed at her warm greeting.
“Whatever. Tell me everything that has been going on. Are you having a good time?” she asked, her words rushed as she couldn’t stand to wait any longer for some juicy news.
Knowing that I had just the type of news she would want to hear, I made her wait a little bit longer.
“How are things back home? Are you and Lance hanging out?”
Sighing, Kylie was noticeably agitated. “Come on Leigh. I don’t want to talk about how boring it is here in Kentucky. I want to hear about my best friend and her insane road trip,” she practically shouted.
“Well, I submitted my manuscript to a small publisher, but I haven’t heard anything back,” I began.
“That’s awesome!” Kylie exclaimed. “What else?”
“Brandon found a really cool bar and performed there. He did great!” I said, building her up for the next piece of information.
“That’s great, it sounds like you all are having a good time,” Kylie said, her voice happy.
“Well, something else happened,” I began allowing my voice to trail off leaving Kylie in suspense.
“What?” she asked slowly, knowing my tone meant that I had something juicy to tell her.
“Well, Brandon and I have really been having a great time. He has been so sweet and supportive,” I said.
“Yeah,” Kylie pushed, begging me to get to the point.
“Anyway, after his performance the other night, we kissed,” I said, pausing.
“What?” Kylie screamed into the phone. I could hear her jumping up and down and I laughed at the sounds.
“That’s not all,” I teased.
“You have to tell me more,” Kylie pleaded again.
“The kiss was breathtaking,” I admitted. “We went back to the hotel room... we had sex.”
Loud. Screams. Emerged from the other line as Kylie fell over from my news. I was worried that she was angry. She had been warning me about this all along and now, I was telling her she was right.
“What. The Fuck?” Kylie giggled. “Are you telling me, that you and Brandon actually had sex?” she asked.
Smiling brightly, I replied with a yes.
“Tell me everything,” Kylie demanded. I was almost shocked that she was giddy and not telling me what a mistake I made.
“Are you mad?” I asked, clearly confused by her change of demeanor.
“No. I am not mad,” she sighed loudly into the phone. “I totally saw this coming. I have been trying to warn you about falling for him, but it seems like you and Brandon really like each other. I always knew he had a thing for you, but I have to admit it shocks me you have feelings for him. Maybe you two are destined to be together,” she said.
“Maybe,” I agreed, emotions swirling inside of me like a tornado. “I do have to admit, though, I still worry about the other girls. He keeps getting calls and it does bother me, but he never answers their texts or phone messages.”
“That is tough, but you have known Brandon a long time. He has never cared about any of those girls. Maybe he has changed,” she offered.
“I hope so,” I said hesitantly.
“Just remind him that your best friend will kick his ass if he hurts you,” she said with force.
Laughing, I smiled into the phone. “Trust me, I will kick his ass if he hurts me,” I mused.
“So...” Kylie said, her voice full of curiosity. “How was it?”
Smiling so brightly I felt Kylie could feel the radiance through the receiver. I had dreamed of this moment forever. Being able to share such intimate secrets with my best friend. I had spent so many years listening to all of her juicy stories and eating up each and every naughty detail. Now, it was my turn to spill.
“Everything was amazing. No, it was better than amazing. He did things to my body that I never thought anyone would ever do. I finally stopped fighting my attractions and just allowed myself to enjoy him,” I said. I continued to recount every moment of the blissful experience.
Kylie listened and hung to every word I said. “I can’t believe my little Leigh isn’t a virgin anymore,” she said aloud just as Brandon walked back through the hotel room door.
Sweating and looking like a glistening god, Brandon smirked as he heard Kylie through the speakerphone.
Laughing, I smiled at him as I mouthed, I’m sorry.
“Hey Kylie,” Brandon chimed in as he walked past me and went straight to the bathroom where I heard him turn on the shower.
We ended our conversation as Kylie demanded I call her at least once a day, to tell her all of the dirty and naughty things that Brandon and I did.
Laughing, Kylie and I both enjoyed the moment. “I will call you again soon,” I said before hanging up the phone.
After Brandon emerged from the bathroom, he sat in one of the chairs in the room and picked up his guitar. I began skimming through my phone, checking over missed text messages and checking out what was happening on my social media sites. Everyone was either working or vacationing in a tropical location. As I glanced through photos posted online, I heard Brandon begin to strum on his guitar. With his hair still damp from his shower, he focused intently on his fingers which were meticulously working against the tight strings of is guitar. At first, I gave him his space and paid little attention to the sounds he was creating. Sometimes when Brandon played his guitar, he became lost in his own musical world and I left him alone.
My ears began to pick up on a familiar sound as the notes turned to one in which I felt a tug on my very own heart. Swiftly moving my head, I dropped my phone in my lap and stared at Brandon who was still focused on his musical tunes. As his fingers expertly strummed, he began to play the opening chords of my favorite song, ‘More Than Words’ by Extreme. This nineties rock ballad was a song I had heard several times growing up and one in which I had grown to love over the years. Something about the simple words and notes of the song spoke to me in ways I could never explain.
As I listened, my breath stopped as I couldn’t believe Brandon knew my favorite song, a song that wasn’t popular or played on the radio like modern pop songs.
“You know this song?” I asked, breaking the barrier between us.
Nodding his head, Brandon slowly looked up at me as he never missed a note. “I remember you telling me a while back that you liked this song,” he said as if this wasn’t a big deal.
This. Was. A. Big. Deal. In fact, this was one of the sweetest and kindest things anyone had ever done.
“I didn’t know you knew it though,” I whispered, my body frozen in place.
“I didn’t,” Brandon said as he turned back to the guitar. “I learned it so I could play it for you. I am still working on perfecting some of the lyrics and the sound, but overall I think I have mastered the song,” he said again, his voice never breaking tune.
“I can’t believe you did that,” I said as I began to stand. Slowly walking away from the bed, I made my way to Brandon who was strumming along on the guitar and the strings of my heart. As I reached him, I slowly bent down and wrapped my arms around his neck.
Startled, Brandon’s eyes grew wide as he looked up at me, shocked at first.
“Thank you,” I said, my voice shaking as I fought back tears.
Stopping my song, Brandon laid his guitar down next to us and placed his arms around me, returning the hug. “You don’t have to thank me, Leigh. I wanted to do this,” he said, his voice ringing through my ears.
“I understand, but you didn’t have to do it,” I began. “That is why it means so much. This is the kindest thing anyone has ever done,” I finished.
Holding me back at arms-length, Brandon observed me carefully. “Leigh, I told you that you are important to me. You always have been. It makes me sad that this is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for you.”
Hugging him again, I wanted to memorize everything about this moment so I could replay it over and over again in my mind.
Finishing his song, I sat on the bed and listened intently as Brandon sang the rest of ‘More than Words’ before moving on to a few other songs he knew I loved.
After playing for an hour, Brandon had grown tired and knew he needed to rest his voice for later so we decided to venture out of our hotel room and find something to eat for dinner. We had yet to experience very much outside of our hotel room, and trust me, I was not complaining. After what Brandon had done for me, I knew that I had made the right decision in giving him a part of myself I had been waiting to give to someone special. Brandon was special and now, he was mine.
“What are you in the mood for?” I asked as we drove out of the hotel parking lot.
Eyeing me, Brandon raised his brows and gave me his sexiest smile. “You,” he growled. I knew exactly what he was in the mood for. It was pushing hard against his jeans as he sat in the driver’s seat.
Laughing, I smacked his arm. “That will come later,” I teased. “I need to eat or I won’t have the strength to do anything later,” I continued, running my hand over his thighs.
It was insane in how only a few short hours, Brandon and I had moved from friends to lovers to...well, I’m not sure exactly what we are now, but we have definitely passed the friend zone.
“Fine,” Brandon grumbled as he continued to drive. “Promise me, though, that I can eat you up for my dessert,” he asked as he licked his lips.
With wide eyes, I turned and stared at him. Brandon’s powers on me were almost supernatural. “I promise,” I replied, licking my lips as I thought about what I would allow him to do.
After a few minutes, we found a bar and grill that looked to have a live band playing. Since we had come to Nashville, it only made sense to check out all of the venues that allowed live music. With Brandon’s gig tonight, I knew we needed to eat fast and get him ready to return to the club by nine. It was five in the evening and the bar was already filling with patrons. Dessert would have to wait until later tonight.
After eating burgers and fries and listening to a few great live performers, Brandon and I had decided to leave. Just as we were about to stand and walk away from our table, the first few notes of Journey’s, ‘Don’t Stop Believing,’ began to play. A woman in a tight jean skirt and spiky short hair emerged on the stage holding a microphone.
“Everyone, it’s karaoke time,” she beamed as everyone in the bar began to whistle and cheer around us.
Laughing, I looked at Brandon. We still had time before we needed to get to the club where he was going to perform. “Can we just stay through a couple of songs?” I asked, batting my eyes.
Laughing, Brandon agreed as he sat back down. “We can stay, but you have to get on that stage with me and sing,” he said, his voice completely serious.
Shaking my head, no, I jumped from my seat. On second thought, maybe we should leave.
Grabbing my hand, Brandon pulled me to him as he began to stand too. “Oh no, you don’t. You want to stay, so you will sing.”
As I began to protest, Brandon motioned for the woman on the stage. Noticing him, she smiled brightly. “It looks like we have our first victims,” she laughed as she held out the microphone.
Brandon literally had to drag me to the stage as I felt as if I would die of embarrassment. I was not a singer. In fact, I was sure my singing could be used to torture terrorists. As we reached the stage, Brandon and I both stepped up the small steps and I stood frozen in front of the large crowd. How Brandon could do this so flawlessly amazed me.
Still holding my hand, Brandon held the microphone between us. As he began to belt out the infamous words to the song, I continued to stand frozen in place like a complete idiot. Everyone was singing along and yelling as Brandon began to move and really get into the song. Nudging me, Brandon waited for a musical interlude before whispering in my ear.
“Come on, just sing along. It’s fun,” he said with a smile so bright, I couldn’t help but believe him.
When the lyrics began to play again, I slowly began to sing along. At first, my words came out as a whisper, but the louder the crowd chanted, the more I realized they couldn’t really hear me. Deciding to just give in to Brandon and the crowd around me, I began to dance around the stage as I screamed out the lyrics. The rush of adrenaline I received made me forget my nervousness and stage fright. Now, I could see what Brandon saw in this whole live performance thing. It was like a high no other.
When the song finally ended, another couple braved the stage and took the microphone from Brandon. Smiling and stumbling along, they were obviously full of liquid courage as they began to sing the tunes of Lady GaGa’s ‘Paparazzi.”
Making our way through the crowd, which was still singing and dancing along with the couple, Brandon led me to the exit. Once outside, I exhaled a breath I hadn’t known I had been holding.
