Lost in loves abyss, p.19
Lost In Love's Abyss, page 19
She had to have been there. That was the only thing that made sense.
“You gonna be around for a few?” Zay stepped out of the front door, walking up beside me.
“Why, what’s up?”
“Colby’s short staffed today and they can’t get me the part I need to finish up the car I’m working on. I told him I’d come get it.”
“You’re good. I need to handle this payroll anyway.”
“Alright, bet. I shouldn’t be more than a couple hours. Considering traffic.”
I offered a nod as he crossed the parking lot, rounding the building to where our employees parked. After one last sweep of the area, I headed back inside, dialing Embria three times back to back with no answer.
I then sent a text, which got no reply. I had no idea what the hell was going on but she would be seeing me later. I fucked up by allowing too much time and space between us but that was ending today. I’d be damned if I let her think the reason I had shut her out was because of another woman.
By the time I made it to Embria’s house, it was just after eight. I had called several more times, all of which she ignored, but this time she wasn’t about to hide from me. We were going to settle things even if I had to break down her damn door to get to her. I was fully prepared to do so but fortunately I didn’t have to. After one round of knocking and laying heavily on the doorbell, the door was snatched open but it wasn’t Embria’s face on the other side.
“Kam, right? Can I speak to Embria?” She stood in the doorway, scowl in place, hands on her shapely hips, eyes blazing with fire. I was sure Embria had already given her account of what she thought she saw which would explain the bullets her gaze shot through me at the moment.
“You have some nerve showing up here.”
“I know you probably assume the worst but it’s not what you think.” I tried to explain but she released a bitter laugh, folding her arms securely across her chest. I was grateful, because with the heat she was sending my way, I wasn’t sure if she’d swing on me.
“What I think is you thugged your sexy ass right into my girl’s life, made her fall in love with you, shut her out for something that wasn’t her fault, then had the nerve to lie about the fact that you got another woman pregnant. I’m ten seconds off beating your ass because you hurt my friend. My best friend!”
“Whoa, what the hell you mean lied about getting another woman pregnant? If you’re referring to Trece, that’s not my damn baby.”
“Mmhm and that’s why you’re out here in the streets giving belly rubs and forehead kisses.”
“That’s not what it was. I’m sure that’s what it looked like but Embri got things all twisted. Can I just come in so that we can talk this out?”
“Nope, she’s not here.”
“Where the hell is she?” I felt my jaw twitch while I held my breath. I swear on everything I loved if she told me Embria was with another man I was gonna lose my shit.
“She’s on a staycation.”
“What the fuck is a staycation?”
“A weekend getaway in your city. She’s tucked away in a quaint little suite, repairing the damage you’ve done to her heart.”
“Who’s she with?”
It pained me to ask the question because if it wasn’t Kam then it had to be…
“Wouldn’t you like to know? You blew it, buddy. Now, if you don’t mind. I’m going to get back to my own staycation away from my needy ass mother. You’re disrupting my peaceful moment. Have a good life, sir.”
She went to slam the door but my palm landed hard against it.
“Yo, hold up. I swear on God it’s not what she thinks. I’m not with Trece, that’s not my baby. I know I fucked up by staying away, but truthfully, I was dealing with my own shit and just let the space happen. I love Embri. You don’t have to believe me but I mean it. I want to fix things with us.”
“Well, then, get to it, bruh. I wish you the best.”
“Come on, Kam. If you love her as much as you say you do then…”
Her eyes narrowed quick as hell and she was in my face seconds later. “Don’t you fucking dare. That’s my girl. I’m the only one who has her back and I’m the one who’s been here trying to make sure she was good since…”
“Since what?”
When she paused, I noticed something flicker in her eyes that I couldn’t decipher. Maybe she meant since I broke her heart because I was sure that was exactly what I’d done. I made promises I failed to deliver on and that was on me. I was fully prepared to be held accountable but that didn’t mean I was willing to let things end with us.
“Since you shut her out. You’re the one who messed up. Don’t come for me about mine when you’re the one on some bullshit.”
I held my hands up in surrender. “You’re right. I apologize. Can you just do me a solid? Tell me where she is because if not I’ll spend the next few days pulling up at every hotel in the city causing problems until I find her. Or worse, I’ll just stay here with you and continue disrupting your peaceful moment.”
She rolled her eyes and sucked her teeth. “Boy, you aren’t about to do all that.”
I shrugged. “You don’t know me then. Where she’s concerned, I’ll do whatever necessary.”
“Says the man who’s been MIA for two months.” Her head cocked to the side as if challenging me.
“I messed up and made the wrong call. But at least I’m here to try and fix it. I just need your help to do so.”
“Whatever. You better be glad I used to like you. She’s at the Four Seasons, Presidential Suite, and don’t say I didn’t warn you about what you might find when you get there. I hope your hands are up to date, fam.” She grinned, winked, and slammed the door in my face. I was too caught up in what she meant by what I might find.
My damn chest got tight at the thought of Embria moving on with another man. One she felt comfortable enough spending the weekend with, tucked away in some fancy ass suite. That wasn’t about to happen. I was dragging her right up out of there if that’s what needed to be done. There was no way in hell Embria was going to be with anyone but me.
TWENTY-THREE
Embria
After calling in my order for room service, I made a beeline straight to the bathroom. I swear I had to take on every cliché associated with pregnancy. Morning sickness, exhaustion, weird cravings, and the dreaded issue with my bladder now functioning as if it were the size of a pea. If I so much as sipped anything, it felt as if my bladder was screaming for relief seconds later. I had no idea how on earth I would make it through another six months of this.
By the time I was done, there was a knock on the door, which had me tightening my robe and heading to collect my room service. I had ordered enough food for five people but what did it matter? This was my “I don’t give a fuck” weekend and I planned on taking full advantage of everything this place had to offer, starting with overindulging in their world renowned menu of delectable treats. My heart might have been shattered but my stomach was empty and ready for some action.
“That was…”
My eyes ballooned when they landed on Rah instead of what I assumed was room service. I guess it made sense that they wouldn’t have arrived that fast with the heavy load I placed on them, but there wasn’t time for me to worry about it because Rah brushed past me with so much force that I stumbled just a bit before I was able to turn to see what the hell he was doing.
“I don’t recall inviting you in and how the hell did you find me anyway?”
“Kam. Who’s here with you?” He was angry. I could see it in his heated gaze and feel the energy radiating from his body but that mattered little to me. He was the one who had broken me. Not the other way around.
“No one is here, neither should you be. Don’t you have a family to tend to?” He never responded. He simply turned, moving through my suite like a tornado with his big angry energy. I watched him with wild eyes, trying to figure out what the hell his problem was and it didn’t click until he finished his sweep and was standing a few feet away, face twisted into a scowl.
Kam!
She told him where to find me and must have dropped some hint that I wasn’t alone. I would have smiled if I wasn’t currently rooted in my own fury. But my God, how was I going to maintain this level of anguish with him looking so damn good and smelling like everything I’d missed over the past few months. My safe space, my peace. He was home and I hated how turbulent that made me feel. My emotions were blazing and chaotic to the point where I felt tears pooling and my body began to tremble.
“She said you were with someone.”
“She lied.” I scoffed at that thought. “I’m sure it was her way of making you feel just a pinch of what I’ve been experiencing lately.”
His face softened a little, but not enough to make a difference. That only further infuriated me. “You didn’t answer my question. Don’t you have a family you should be tending to instead of barreling in here like you have the right?”
I tugged at my robe which brought his eyes down my body to where my hand rested at the belt loosely tied around my waist.
“Are you really asking me that shit?”
“Why wouldn’t I? You got my text, didn’t you?” I squinted slightly, attempting to keep the tears at bay. It was working for the moment.
“Yeah I got that bullshit. Do you really think I’m that fucked up that I would lie to you about something that serious? That’s not my kid.”
“Well you certainly looked cozy, so congrats. I’m not sure what role you’re choosing to play in her life but when you figure it out, let me know and I’ll adjust. I don’t expect much, if anything at all, but I won’t let you deny our child for hers. You better make it work.”
I shot him the nastiest look before attempting to head to the door to make it clear I wanted him to leave. But before I could complete my first step, he was on me. My heart sprinted in my chest while our eyes engaged in a war of wills.
“What the fuck did you just say?”
“You heard me.”
“No, I don’t think I did. Because there’s no way you just said our child. That would imply you’re pregnant.” His voice was eerily calm. Almost to the point of seeming unbothered. However, it contradicted the energy radiating from his body slamming into mine. It was almost as if I could physically feel his anger dancing across my skin.
“You said you read my text.” My voice felt small for some reason. Maybe it was because he had no clue what the hell I was talking about until this very moment.
“I did but…shit…two, fuck, man. I assumed you meant me and Trece. You meant two babies. You’re…we’re…” I saw the reality process when his eyes lowered to my stomach. My body jerked slightly when he yanked my robe open. There wasn’t much to see. It could be mistaken as a full belly from a solid meal.
“Shit, how long…”
When I didn’t answer right away, his eyes went dark again. He was thinking hard. I could see those thoughts crashing through his mind and the anger they caused. He was so damn handsome and the scowl he wore only made him that much more appealing. His jaw twitched before his chin dipped and he backed away, leaning against the rear of the small sofa behind him.
“Embri, come here.”
“No.”
“Embria, let’s go,” he growled with a fire in his eyes that had my feet moving before my brain processed the act. I stopped a foot away but his large hands moved beneath my robe, landing on my hips and closing the space between us. Rah’s eyes closed and his forehead pressed into my stomach. It felt like forever before I heard his voice again.
“You hate me so much that you weren’t gonna tell me about my kid?”
“I was…”
“When, Embri? How long have you known? Shit, is that what I did to us? Got you so fucked up behind me that it was that easy for you to keep this from me.”
“Can you really blame me? You shut me out and that hurt. A lot. Even though I hadn’t done anything wrong, I still tried. I called, texted, and nothing. How was I supposed to feel?”
“Like you knew me enough to know that this matters. That’s my fucking kid.”
“Right, your kid. But what about me?”
His tortured gaze found me at the exact moment I swiped my tear.
Such a damn crybaby.
“Embri…” His voice softened but I didn’t care. I tried to pull back but he held me tighter.
“Don’t do that. I fucked up. I apologize. Just the way you looked at me that day. It’s the last thing I wanted. I didn’t know what to do with that.”
“You could have given me the chance to say that it didn’t matter. That I don’t care because that’s not who you are and has nothing to do with the man that I fell in love with. I see you. Not what you’ve been through, just you.”
“That was hard for me to wrap my mind around. I should have handled things different…”
“But you didn’t. Then you were with her and now I just…”
“Fuck that. I’m not with anybody but you, Embri. I know what it looked like but you’re wrong. I helped her with her car, we talked a little, and I wished her well. Today was the first time I’ve seen her in months. Since the day we met it’s only been about you. That’s my word. I don’t have any reason to lie.”
I still didn’t speak, we simply engaged in a stare down for what felt like eternity. The only thing that separated our eyes was when his moved past me and landed on the door.
“That’s the food I ordered.” I attempted to break away but he shut that down without a second thought.
“No, stay here. I got it.”
I watched as he accepted the two rolling carts and handed off cash for a tip before the door was shut and locked again. My stomach growled from the aroma but apparently I was going to have to wait to satisfy my hunger.
When Rah made it back to me, my feet left the carpeted floor and my thighs widened enough to encase his sides while I was being carried to the bedroom. Rah sat with me around his waist, taking a minute to gather his thoughts.
“I fucked up but I need you to forgive me because I swear on everything I love, which now includes this baby, that it will never happen again.”
This baby.
What about me?
“It is what it is. We’ll figure out how to make this work for both of us.” He stared hard for a long moment before I was lifted and landed hard against the mattress. Before I had the chance to react, his body covered mine.
“That’s not good enough. Sounds like two people functioning but not together.”
“It is. Infinite numbers of people co-parent and…”
He laughed arrogantly from somewhere deep, then I felt his hand at the base of my neck before gently gliding up to my chin, which he gripped firmly, lowering his face to mine. “I’m not co-parenting with you, Embri. We’re doing this together. As a family.” He spoke with confidence reflected in his eyes before mine shut when his lips brushed against mine. It was soft and timid at first, growing more passionate as I felt a trail of kisses move from my lips to my cheek and down my neck.
“Tell me you forgive me.” His voice was low and throaty, like the words were having a hard time escaping. My back arched a little when his fingers glided across the soft skin between my legs and dipped a little lower to enter me.
“Tell me.” I felt his demand and delivered confirmation.
“I forgive you.”
“You promise?”
“Mmmhmm. Shit, I promise.” Maybe I meant it, maybe I didn’t. At the moment all I knew was my body was reacting and wanted more. My hands moved between us and my hand brushed across the thickness resting against his thigh. When I tugged at the waistband of his joggers and managed enough space for my fingers to make it beneath them, he moaned in my mouth before his tongue collided with mine.
“I missed you.”
“I missed you too.”
“I’m still angry.” His eyes lowered to mine and I could tell he understood. “You hurt me.”
“I know, baby, and I’m gonna make it up to you. I promise.”
His fingers began a rapid pace that had my back arching away from the bed and seconds later, my eyes slammed shut and I felt my body take flight.
While I drifted through my first orgasm, Rah was already in the process of working on my second. I felt his body push between my thighs, spreading them to an uncomfortable width, then I felt him.
He entered me hard. My spine shuddered from the intrusion but I quickly got it together by the time he pulled back and landed deep again. I grinded against his hard thrusts, feeling needy. Maybe it was because my hormones were all over the place or I possibly just missed him that much but the harder he pushed the more my body yielded to accommodate.
His hands pushed at my thighs, spreading them wider, which sent him deeper. I felt connected, eyes on fire. I could feel his essence in every inch of my body. The crazy thing was that we were making love but it was hard, intense, and aggressive. Rah was using his body to make a point. I was his, he was mine, and fuck my thoughts on co-parenting. It was the last visible thought I had before my spine spasmed and my groin jolted, causing me to grind harder against him. I wanted every single inch of him in me while I was traveling over the edge and Rah delivered. He stayed the course until my fingers tightened around his arms, nails digging into his skin, announcing that I was back with him again.
He pounded hard, with long steady strokes until he grunted through the final one and collapsed on top of me. When his body relaxed and I felt the weight of him, I released his arms and allowed my fingers to glide up and down his spine. His lips tickled my shoulder and neck before they brushed against mine again.
“You okay?”
“Yep. Perfect.” My cheesy smile couldn’t be avoided. “But I’m still angry with you.”
