Steel, p.11
Steel, page 11
Carissa joins us thirty minutes later. The Trinity have also added extra people and will buy the rental for our added security. Alec raises an eyebrow.
"Business is obviously good."
The delicate flick of her hair says it all. "We also have extra people at The Coven. We have people reviewing the footage from all cameras around Mel's place."
She brings me up to date on what their people are doing. I almost give up thinking she'll show up to dinner, when Amelia strolls through the door. Her hair in tight curls, still damp. Her eyes look small and swollen and there's a pillow line mark across her face.
"I'm sorry. I fell asleep."
Carissa smiles. "I know, I went looking for you and you were out."
Her lips curve, natural, easy, reaching her eyes. "I was tired."
"Now you can eat," Alec says. "You look like a kid like that, Mel. Innocent like the proverbial lamb."
She laughs and in that second, I'm jealous of my friend. She laughs with him, smiles at Carissa with affection. She barely looked at me when she walked in the room. I made it this way but I'm trying to save her. I hate that she resents me for it. But, if this is what it takes…
She takes the chair next to Carissa and reaches for the bread. "Jamie just called. He's sending his two people the day after tomorrow. The Ops should be here by then as well."
"What people? What Ops?"
She looks at me and there's nothing in her face, as though she crafted it out of Sheetrock and painted it a bland beige. "Jamie found us some ex-cops and former Black Ops. They will help fortify security here."
Heat squirms up my spine. The kind of heat that makes me want to smash my fist into a wall or chew on some fine glass. "Let me guess, now that you have all these specialized men, you want me to return California with Alec and Carissa?" I can't help it, the edge in my voice scrapes over my own skin.
Alec stiffens, Carissa looks between her friend and me, but Amelia continues to chew on her bread, swallows it and exhales.
"Not at all. I just thought we may need some extra eyes. You can't be everywhere at once and there will probably be nights when you get tired of babysitting me."
She manages to make it worse. Her words, so sensible and rational, jag into my brain, snagging at my senses. Alec's hand flattens over mine, his eyes send a firm warning. I snatch my hand and grab my drink. I count to fifty, the tension in the room thickening, expanding with each number.
"I think it's a good idea. They can help secure the premises and Leo can concentrate on protecting Mel. It makes your job easier."
I swear Alec is not helping. He's trying and I'm grateful for that, but all I can hear is Amelia saying she's bringing four guys in because she thinks I can't protect her, or maybe she's just pissed the hell off at me. Either way, I'm good and ticked.
"Any other surprises you have for us, Amelia?"
She shakes her head. I swear she must be high. She must have taken something. The real Amelia wouldn't have let me get away with that tone. Zombified Amelia taps her fingers on the table cloth. "Tomorrow, I have a couple of appointments to go see houses, better said, condos."
Condos? Fucking condos. Now I know she's high. And because one crazy comment deserves a crazy reaction, I laugh.
Carissa and Alec just stare at me. Amelia keeps buttering and eating her bread as if I'm not laughing. I hate this chick. I can't crack her no matter what I do.
"You want to go look for condos when there's a killer on the loose? Someone who's got his eye centered on you?"
Something flashes in her eyes and it's the first real reaction to anything I said but it’s gone before I take my next breath and she butters another roll. "I can't stay home and do nothing. Being cooped up here would drive me crazy."
Maybe I need to enumerate the reasons why she should stay in. I hold up fingers for her. "Killer. Who wants to kill you. On the loose. Amelia."
She shoves more bread in her mouth, takes her time chewing. It's been more than a day since I've seen her eat anything. She must be making up.
"I'm not going to live in fear. I've already had people tailing me and living with me. I have to hire extra security and stay in my best friend's home. I'm not going to cower behind four walls. I might as well be dead."
"You very well could be if you don't take this seriously." I'm an asshole. Carissa blanches and Alec looks at me. He doesn't have to say anything but Amelia puts her bread down, gives her plate a slight push.
Great, now I took her appetite.
"I'm not trying to scare you, just press what you're up against."
This time she laughs. It's almost offensive how loud and sharp it is. "Yeah because I can forget what I'm up against. It's not like he killed both our sisters and Byanca and he's made me number four on his little project. He's easy to forget."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply you really forgot. That's not what I'm trying to do."
"What exactly are you trying to do? I'm not pushing you out of the protection business or giving you a hard time about it. I just could use a little normalcy in my life right now. Does that bother you or is it just not part of your plan?"
"Are you looking for a fight, Amelia?"
The shake of her head is lethargic, as though she could barely move it. Her eyes are almost empty. "No, I'm not looking for anything, except peace to enjoy my friends' last evening here."
It's a jab. A good one, square on the chin. It makes me stumble because of the drop in her voice at the last words and everything she doesn't say. I'm obviously not a friend, which is good because I never wanted to be her friend, but I don't want her to feel isolated. Two days ago, we could still talk to each other. Now, we don't even have that. God, I don't know how to answer, how to reassure her.
But I don't have to. Carissa answers her phone and it's a video call from Gia with the kids. After they greet Alec and me, the two women leave the room to eat in Amelia's room and talk on the phone.
Alec's kids put smiles on our faces but as soon as the women are out of the room, the tension comes back full force.
"Leo, I need to give you some advice. Stop picking fights with her. Yeah, it's not a good time for her to be looking for places to live but she is right. She has to do something and being locked in the house is not living…just like shutting her out to protect her, leaving her and yourself isolated, is also no way to live."
"What do you want me to do? When we're together, we forget the world. We don't pay attention. People die."
Alec leans forward and whispers, "Do you blame her?"
It's a fist to the gut. No matter what happens, I could never blame Amelia. "No, I just don't want her to die. I couldn’t live with that."
20
I made my decision. Amelia Solis' new life starts today. Yes, the murdering asshole is after me but I can't continue to be the sad chick I was yesterday. I need to be myself, take control of my life. I can't lay in bed and cry because my best friends are not here. I need to be less dependent on the girls. I can't keep running to them with my problems. They're married women now and I don't want to be that friend. The one calling people because she doesn't have her shit together.
I woke up early because I couldn't sleep. I seem to have gotten used to the weight on the other side of the bed and the occasional snore. The quiet, dark bedroom where I normally love to stay, made me yearn for things I shouldn't want and I decided are long gone and far out of my reach.
I got off the bed, sat at the desk and made a plan. Go back to exercising and make sure both the places I go see today have a room I can turn into a small gym or yoga room. I'll call Doctor Jacinda and see if she'll see me this week. I just need to talk things out with her. Go to dinner with Jamie and a couple of other friends. Check on Mayra and make sure she is hanging in there.
I did all of that and it's only nine in the morning. I'm in the home office with six open windows on my browser. One has a condo, another a townhouse, a children's store so I can buy Brook and Huddy some presents. The William-Sonoma is so I can buy Gia and Noah a welcome back present.
I got an email from Jamie. His people are coming around early tomorrow morning. I need to reposition our security to accommodate the new hires. The Ops and ex-cops will have to be trained on everything pertaining to the lounge. I don't want to have any crazy incidents where the new people rough our clientele or stand out. The Coven can't afford more bad press. We just got over the whole thing with Gia. I need to go visit my store this week. I need to bring my checklist to make sure everything on it is accomplished. I've been working on a new thing I want the contractor to add to it. Well, I was. I hit purchase on the cart on both windows and go back to my research. I need to talk to a few colleagues about the new store too, get some input and opinions. I also need to hire an advertising agency.
All that halts because my song comes on. My shoulders shimmy and my head shakes to the beat. The tempo picks up and my fist rolls into the air. I need to have this guy for a live night. He's bound to have everyone on the dance floor, especially if Gia can come up with a new Spell. A new drink, a hot musical guest, yeah, we would rake the money in that night.
A shadow shifts over me and my eyes fly up, fist frozen in the air. Leandro stands in front of me. There's a bright smile on his face. He just caught me shaking my butt on a chair and I can't say anything because my heart is trying to inch its way up my chest.
He mouths something but I can't hear him. I can only hear the hook telling me I’m a hardcore from the bedroom to the door. I yank the headphones from my ears and lay them on the desk.
"What did you say?"
His smile softens and I know I yelled that. He's looking at me in that way he did when things were good between us. When we're fighting and flirting, not this silent and somber thing we're doing now. This smile is like the one before he fell asleep on our special night on Block Island. Then, we were living for the promise of tomorrow. Now, I live to distract myself until I find me again.
"I asked when we're leaving for your first house appointment."
Oh. Damn it. He's coming along. I keep hoping he'll change his mind. My feelings must be clear because his smile dries, leaving behind that serious face, so unlike him, so grating. I miss that second of levity. I hate how starved I am for it again. Maybe if I don't put up a fight and just go along with the inevitable, we won't need to fight through this. I'm not a sore loser.
"In an hour. I'm just going through the shuffling of our security. I'll provide you with the information once I have it finalized."
It's an olive branch but he doesn't take it. He just looks at me with a blank stare. It's like he can't decide how he'll react to me. "Okay."
I shrug and go back to my reading. This time without headphones, to the beat of the thick silence and his breathing. Oddly enough, this feels comforting as hell. Except, he sits down and stares at me.
"What exactly is on your plate today?"
"Two places to see. I need to go in to The Coven and speak to our security and personnel there. I need to give them a heads-up about what's going on…something close to the truth that also lets them know it's important to stay vigilant. Then I need to go deal with our Bronx guy. Maybe meet with some business people."
"That's a lot for one day, Amelia. Should you be doing all that after everything that's happened? Why don't you pace yourself?"
I squelch the snarky question in my tongue, would he be asking this if I were Alec? Instead, I decide to go with the plan and keep the peace. "It's my normal schedule. I'm always on the move. Too bad I can't go shopping. Maybe I can if they fit me in private after hours. I should call."
I say it tongue-in-cheek, but he refuses to go with it. His face doesn't change. He doesn't laugh or roll his eyes.
"I'm trying to keep this friendly. We're both adults and we can work together," I say, instead of screaming, Your rejection is killing me, but here I am, trying. You should try too. I'm proud of myself for keeping it all in.
He levels me with an I'm-not-convinced look. "You barely looked at me last night, refused to open the door when I knocked, but now you want to be friendly."
I don't take his bait. I'm not going to. "I am trying to make the best out of an uncomfortable situation. This is what our approach should have been from the beginning. We shouldn't have blurred the lines."
"Blurred the lines? Those are interesting words for…"
"Leandro." I hope the rebuke is as forceful to him as it sounds to my ears. "There's no point talking about something that's done with. It was a good, human moment. Now, like you wish, like I wish, we both move on."
"Amelia, I don't wish…that's not what this is about."
I hold my hand up. "It's not up for discussion. It doesn't matter anyway."
He recoils and I immediately regret the words I used. They couldn't be less genuine and further from the truth.
I take a long breath. "It's not that what happened doesn't matter, let's just continue down this new course. We're both under way too much pressure, let's make it easy on each other."
"How?"
His voice is hoarse and I wonder if he meant to say anything at all.
I shrug. "Like it never happened."
"Are we going to erase the last two years too?"
He echoes my thoughts, my feelings, what's screaming in the dark corners of my brain, the musings I cannot let keep coming to light.
"What do you want from me, Leandro? I'm making an effort. I can't be the cowering victim, waiting for Sebastian to come kill me. I need to do what's best for me. I need to move on, get my life on track, start taking care of me."
"I know."
It's hard for him. I know it is. His agreement seems almost painful.
"You know, Leandro. Maybe it's better if you sit this one out. I am only going to see houses. I secured a private appointment. Jamie offered to go with me—"
His face hardens and the flash of emotion in his eyes dry the words in my mouth. He shoots to his feet and strolls toward the door. "I'm going, Amelia. You can't manipulate me in this matter. Stop trying."
My throat knots. Nothing we do or say is right for the other. I can see he's struggling and I wish I could be someone else. Someone who knows exactly what to say, someone who makes things easy for him, someone he can't reject.
I'm pathetic and that's what I hate most of all. I can scoff at anything and everyone, except him. I can't shrug him off.
I open the Word document I typed earlier with the list of everything I have to do. Take my life back, that's the plan I can't deviate from.
21
I don't hate Byrnes, and though I'm not happy about the disappointment in Amelia's face, I'm glad he's not here. Since she suggested that he should come house searching with her instead of me, I'm at boiling point. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. Is Alec right? Is pushing her away is a mistake? A mistake. Yup, it feels like a huge fucking mistake.
I ate my miserable meal alone last night and woke up in the middle of the night palming the pillow next to me but her wild hair wasn't there or her body so close to mine. The moments I spent with her on the island spoiled me, left me worse off.
"There's a pool and a gym and a common entertaining area on the fourth floor. Our rooftop can be reserved for private events."
The realtor, Dani with an “I” is blathering on and on but Amelia’s not listening. I can tell. She's standing in front of the enormous closet like she used to do in the tiny one in our room at the bed and breakfast. Her gaze shifts to me, then back to the realtor, and she shakes her head.
"This won't do."
She turns away and heads for the door. The realtor's eyebrows almost crash against each other and she looks to me to explain. How do I tell her I can't? Instead, I rush after Amelia.
I catch her outside the hallway and grab her arm. "What's wrong?"
She shakes her head. "I don't like it."
"Yes, you did. You were daydreaming outfits in front of the closet and you loved the kitchen, even talked about parties."
She yanks her arm back. "I changed my mind. It's not even kid-friendly, if Carissa wants to bring the twins."
I want to argue but I should let it go. It would only cause more issues between us. The realtor joins us and we head to the elevators. The doors open and a guy, tall as me, steps out, takes one look at Amelia and smiles.
Fuck. This is all I needed.
"Mel."
"Fabian, I forgot you live here now." Amelia laughs and the dude's eyes once-over her.
Her back is to me but I guarantee she has the same jovial expression he does. Something sours under my tongue and I curse coincidences.
Dani passes me and joins them in front. "I knew you guys were friends from the paper. I thought having a friend in this building might open your mind to living here, Mel."
I fucking hate Dani the Realtor.
Fabian grabs Amelia’s hand and my spine threatens to shatter it's so stiff. "You're looking at places here? You would love this building. The gym is state-of-the-art, the sauna and pool are amazing. The rooftop has the best of views. We can be neighbors."
"Yeah," Amelia says and Dani-the-Realtor is preening like the head peacock in the crowd. This dude is doing her job for her and the way both are looking at Amelia, she must be warming up to the idea.
"What place did you see? The corner unit? Did you like it?"
She bobs her head up and down. "It's a beautiful place, but…I'm…I'm thinking about it."
He high-fives her. Yeah, he's definitely an asshole. "You would love living here."
He had to say that twice.
He gives her a look so warm even Dani-the-Realtor looks away. Amelia's looking down but not me. My eyes center on him and when he looks up, it's like he sees me for the first time. He shoots me back the same hostile sentiment.
"Let's go," I bark and both women jump. Amelia turns all the way around to look at me.
Oh, fucking great. She forgot I was here. Splendid. I don't spare the dude another look and usher them into the elevator. Amelia is talking fast and he tells her he'll stop by The Coven soon. He's invited, of course.
