Steel, p.16
Steel, page 16
I kiss the mounds over the lace, flicking my tongue over her nipples, bringing the hardened buds in my mouth, sliding my hands down. She arches against my mouth while I pull down her tights, careful to leave her panties on because I need the full visual of her ass in that lace. I bite her nipple and she digs her fingers into my shoulders.
I ask her to step off the pants.
I get my full look. Yes, I've seen her naked. No, it's not the same. We're both different. We're here by pure choice, this is not out of anger, and she loves me. I've been waiting for her love for a long time. All my life.
She's not wearing a thong like in my fantasies. These are more like shorts, made of lace, almost see through, matching her bra. My cock is trying to fight his way out.
"Do you always wear fuck-me underwear?"
"Well, I came to tell you that I love you. It was only a matter of time until we ended up here."
I love her. Jesus, do I love her ready comebacks. Her fresh ass mouth. "That's my girl."
She moves between my legs again, her arms around my neck. "I hate your shirt."
I almost rip it off and send it flying. She slides her hands over my arms.
"I'm offended by your pants."
I stand up and take those off too. I drag them down along with my underwear and kick them off, loving the shock on her face. She looks down at my cock and her tongue peeks out. She takes me in her hands, rubbing me down from base to tip, putting enough pressure that I'm nearly exploding. I turn her on the bed, bend her over the mattress, glide her panties down to her knees and spread her with my fingers. She goes still but I see her face on the dresser. Her eyes are wide, her bottom lip worried between her teeth.
"Are you okay?"
"Um, yes."
"Are you sure?"
She nods. "I want it…like this."
We will talk about this. I finish removing her panties and reach for her breasts again. The friction of the lace against my hands almost undoes me.
"Please," she moans and leans all the way down on her elbows, opening the doors to paradise to a man whose thoughts are only on the sin.
I like this. She's pliant, almost submissive. Something that's never on the same planet with Amelia.
I grip her hips tight with one hand. "Tell me what you want." I rub myself at the entrance of her pussy.
"Do what you want. I'm yours."
Jesus. I want to plow her like a virgin field, bury myself so deep inside her. And I do. I hook my legs under hers on both sides and go all in. One hand around her waist pulling her hips tight against me, I stroke her slow like I can stay in control of myself all day. Her hands brace on the bed and our eyes meet in the mirror. My cock is so deep, clenched so tight, that everything begins to fade. My hand shoots to her throat and she gasps. I freeze.
Her mouth hangs open and she looks scared and I'm about to withdraw and she shakes her head. "Don't fucking stop."
My heart expands. I rock again, go all the way in. Her hips join in, roll, and Jesus is going to need to help us both. I go faster, staring at her face, the way her mouth opens and her eyes roll back and close. The tear rolls down her face but she moans with it and rocks harder.
“Faster,” she pants.
And I hold her tighter, my front glued to her back. My hand still at her throat, the other securing our lower bodies and I'm pumping harder, faster like she wants it and when the strangled cry leaves her mouth, her knees give away and I collapse over her and the pressure wells in my cock, my mind goes numb and I let myself go.
I pull out, shift to the side to avoid crushing her. I would think she’s dead because she doesn't move. I think all my strength poured out of me along with my… "Are you okay?"
She gives me a slight nod and turns around. She rubs the back of her hand over her eyes and shoots me a wavering smile.
My mouth goes dry and I'm almost afraid to ask her but it's a new world and I can't go in afraid. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Her fingers still and she looks up to me.
She looks towards the door as though looking for a way out, takes a deep breath and then back at me. "It's so close."
"Yes."
"I don't do that."
I'm shocked. Honest to God, I am. "Doggie style?"
She shakes her head. "I don't let anyone put their hands on my neck. I don't trust—" She looks down at her hand on my belly.
"Except me."
Her eyes fly to mine and there's a little shyness. "Except you."
Just like that, I'm bigger than Godzilla over Tokyo.
I press a kiss to her forehead. "Welcome home, Virus."
She half laughs. "Virus?"
"Yup, you're the virus, I'm the host."
She shakes her head and moves closer to me and holds my hand.
"I'm sorry I was an ass last night. Thank you for not leaving."
She nods and sighs. "I'm sorry I had to tell you to go fuck yourself."
I glare at her. "You had to tell me?"
"I came all hopeful to confess my feelings and offer you dirty, nasty, sex and you were mean to me. You kept talking about your bottle of Jack Daniel’s. You called me short. You didn't even thank me for making you soup."
I can't help it, I laugh. "I called you short? I'm sorry. I know that hurts the most out of everything I said."
She shoves me.
"We do need to talk."
"I know. Does it have to be now?"
She shakes her head. "Soon, though." Then this wicked look comes over her eyes. "Leandro?"
"Hmm, how much do you bench?"
"250, why?”
She snuggles closer and whispers, "I have an idea…for later."
"So, you hardly come here but there's all sorts of junk food stocked in your cabinets and fresh stuff in your fridge?"
Leandro smiles over his shoulder. His eyes on the game. "My housekeeper stocks the cabinets every two weeks. She takes it home to her kids if I don't come home and then brings new stuff."
Makes sense.
"When was the last time you were here? You're always at Carissa and Alec's."
"I come in for a night or two sometimes, when I need time alone. The last time I came here was after I found out about the baby and got shot. I broke up with Layla after the whole Declan fiasco."
It's funny how her name no longer makes my stomach burn. She was so perfect for him, so gorgeous, taller than me. But he’s fucking mine.
He turns from the game, no longer in a joking tone. "I'm sorry. Did I mess up?"
I shake my head and smile at him. I choose us a snack and head to the living room. He's engrossed in the game again. I rip open the top of the bag of chips and sit on the couch next to him. He drapes his arm around me and pulls me close, all without looking.
I'm dying to sigh because this is nice and comfortable and sweet, but I'm not the sighing type.
Then he kisses my forehead and squeezes me to his side and this time I sigh, long and loud. He looks at me and the next second the bag of chips is tossed to the side and we're making out like teenagers left home alone. Unpleasantly plump Mel never got to make out with the jock, or anyone really. I settle against his chest and we go back to watching the game.
"Did you do this often in high school?"
"Do what?"
"Make out with girls on couches?"
He chuckles. "No, Alec's grandfather had both of us on a strict schedule, along with classes and tutoring. We weren't typical teenagers. Alec was being trained to take over and me to be his right hand. What about you?"
I shake my head.
"You're lying."
"I was the chubby girl, raising her gorgeous little sister with two goddesses for best friends. I faded to the background."
It doesn't hurt anymore to remember. Maybe because I burnt the memories at the gym? Or starved them to death at one point.
"I had male friends, but I was just one of the guys."
"With this body? I saw the photos. You were just a little bigger, hardly fat. Some of us like meat. Those poor souls were just waiting for a chance to get in and you kept their balls blue."
I laugh because he's trying to singe me with his eyes. "My mom dressed me like a middle-aged, retired nun most of the time. She was trying to protect me ever since she saw one of Papi's friends checking me out. She bought me clothes that made me look twice my size."
"How old were you when that guy was checking you out?"
"Eleven." His jaw hardens and his hand close to a fist. I take one and pry it open to kiss his palm. "Anyway, Mami freaked out, like really freaked. So there went my pretty clothes. Then Declan scarred me for life when he mocked me by saying I was the dumpy friend that everyone felt sorry for. He would tell me these things when Gia wasn't anywhere near, of course."
"He's an asshole that Gia sent to hell, exactly where he should be."
I nod against his chest. My heart still fills with pleasure remember how she got Declan. He died like the fucking weasel he was.
"And you still got the same body, made for nasty, dirty things, not to mention you got the handsome man you wanted all alone."
I raise my head at that. "Your ego really does need its own zip code."
"You love that about me."
"No, I do not." Yes, I do.
His face turns serious, his gaze penetrating. "What do you love about me?"
My heart leaps to my throat. Because where the fuck do I start? The beginning I guess. "I love…your smile."
And just like that his face dissolves into one.
"I love your mouth, your body." I rub mine against it and he squeezes my butt tighter.
"We're going to need twin beds here and in our new place in New York."
"Twin bed? Why twin?"
"I want to be like this all the time. No space and nowhere else to go for either of us. Maybe a hammock instead of the bed."
That's when my heart drops and the next second I'm sitting back on my heels staring at him. "What do you mean our new place in New York?"
Did that come out as loud as I think it did?
He sits up, forcing me to stare up at him.
"I mean, I want very narrow beds in our homes, so we are always on top of each other."
His words are slow, his tone deliberate, like he's making a teaching point or I'm hard of hearing.
Normally I would go off on him for stuff like this, call him out on his assumption and high handedness. Except I can't because I'm freaked the hell out by what he just said. It's one thing to accept that I love him and to be trapped inside his place, like our own little island, doing each other in every position ever invented. But living together, where he can wake up to me every morning, where our constant yelling and fighting becomes an everyday thing? How long ‘til the sexy stuff wears off and he walks away?
"Look, I'm really difficult to live with. You can ask the girls. I yell when the bathroom is not clean to my standards and nag them into doing it. I’m sure you know what a demanding pain in the ass I am. Don't you want to see what kind of girlfriend I make before you go all in?"
He stares at me with the blankest face and I feel so stupid because it's as though he's trying to decipher me but can't.
How do I tell him that I don't want to disappoint him? He'll be running for the hills in two days.
"First, I already know how crazy you are. I've known from the beginning because only a woman who's lost her mind would stand up to Alec like you did from the beginning. Second, I've never in my life met a woman that tries to talk a man out of commitment. So, congratulations, once again you've managed to baffle me."
"I'm just…mmm." Can't keep talking when his hand is over my mouth.
"Listen to me. We've been circling each other forever. We've had the awkward one-time hook up and the year of weird behavior around each other. We know each other's families and they love us and couldn’t wait for us to get together. What are we going to do now? Go out for dates and then go back home to sleep. Aren't we past that? Plus, I don’t want to sleep without you."
He's right. But he doesn't know what it's like. Right now, we're new and hot for each other. And what about Sebastian? Should we really be making plans?
"I'm not going to get tired of you, Amelia. Stop thinking. We just need to jump."
Jump, huh? What if the parachute doesn't open? I hear Alec's words in my head that nothing's promised and we need to live for today. If he wants to try to be with me, why am I stupid enough to try and change his mind?
"Okay, Leandro."
He frowns. "Okay?"
I nod hard. "Yeah, let's do it. But you have to be patient with me."
Now he smiles, my favorite smile, the one that makes me want to yank off my T-shirt and these ridiculous booty shorts Gia insisted I bring along.
His lips brush over mine and I wonder if I'll ever get used to tasting his mouth freely, whenever I want.
His hands inch inside my shirt and his fingers rake over my belly. "I want naked days, for us to be naked in bed together, touching each other, kissing, licking, sucking, fucking."
He flips the T-shirt over my head and to the other end of the couch, his eyes over my breasts. "I want to see them more often."
I remove his T-shirt and am ready to move on to the bedroom or maybe a little couch action like neither of us got when we were teenagers. Instead, he lays back down and takes me with him. We're cuddling, naked from the waist up and his hands are drawing circles on my back.
"I thought we were…"
"We are. I just want to enjoy this." He drops a kiss on my lips. "This feels so…right."
Just like that he changes everything. I hug him tighter and see us doing this, coming home to each other.
"I love you," I say, soft and easy, and it softens his face even more, makes him smile so wide and he pulls me up, crushes our mouths together.
30
I don't ever have days like my last two. That's why I wake up with a strange feeling. Her warm body next to mine and her hand on my chin. I know she sleeps, her breath is even and her face peaceful on my chest. Something rumbles and tightens. I don't fight it and just go with it.
I smile like a lunatic into the darkened room. The things we did tonight, the inventive ways we found to fuck each other, it was straight out of my wet dreams. Things I wondered about Amelia for two years now are true, tried and confirmed. They're real and she's real and I'm scared of how well we suit each other. She's not inhibited, has a filthy mind, and a body I can twist and bend at my will. My chest puffs because she tells me she's never been this way with anyone else.
I know women tell men that so they can feel better about themselves, but this is different. I can almost taste the vulnerability in her words, see it reflected in her eyes. I've slayed a lot of chicks in my life, a lot, but with Amelia it’s different, almost new. It's like our sex is from a different playbook. What the fuck.
It's the weirdest thing.
In the afternoon, we cuddled on the couch for the duration of the game. I laid back, enjoyed the warmth of her naked chest against mine. We skirted around our need by talking about the house we both want. I still can't believe I brought up living together. The panic in her eyes had been priceless, but in the end, she relented. She wants a big place where we can give each other space and a big bed so we can roll around like we're doing it on every continent, her words. This chick is awesome.
We talked about what we do when we're home alone. I told her about my love of photography and she told me about Lash N' Gloss. She'd been daydreaming about it for a long time but didn't dare act on it. She didn't think it was possible before but now she realizes everything is possible.
She looked up at me and I saw what she meant in her eyes. Us. I crushed her to me and we devoured each other's mouths. Her body is a religion I just discovered. So I worshiped her with each kiss. I pressed my lips to every inch, slid my tongue over her skin, around her earlobe, down her back, along her swollen folds, against her clit. I made her scream, shiver, simmer, shatter, shake. She laid limp for a while, her dazed eyes on the ceiling, her skin flushed and glowing.
All I could do was sit back on my heels and watch her, take her in, ignoring the anxious need flowing through my engorged cock. Until her eyes settled over me but she didn't smile. She sat up and climbed on me, attacked my mouth that still tasted like her and lowered herself into my cock. She rode me, on my couch, with her hair sticking to both our faces. Her mouth on mine, her tongue stroking to the rhythm of her hips.
She chanted she loved me like it was the only thing she could say, like those were the last words left. The more I heard it the harder I went, the tighter I held her. And then I came with her face on my neck, with my eyes closed and I had to lean us against the backrest because I poured all my strength into her.
That's how I know I'm going to die. This is too good, too amazing to last. I keep coming up with plans and things that we'll do so we can fantasize about them, together. Before it is all taken away. Nothing this beautiful ever stays. I don't deserve her and these moments and life are going to take her from me some way, somehow.
She presses a kiss against my neck. "I would think we could sleep a week, but we haven't eaten dinner." She laughs and lifts her head to look in my eyes. The smile evaporates and she sits up. "What is it?"
And it just flies out of my mouth. "Is this going to last?"
I expect her to be Amelia, tell me to stop being dramatic or maybe take it as if I'm having second thoughts. She takes my hand in hers and presses small kisses over it.
"You’re mine. No one's going to take you from me."
It's my answer. It's what I would say, and I swear my heart rattles. It's like we've been out there in the world, floating and missing each other but somehow we found each other. For years, we've come close so many times, only to drift apart.
She straddles my hips and brings her face closer to mine. "I'm going to shower and you need to find me some food, or you'll really have something to worry about."
We both laugh and she heads to the bathroom. I think of joining her but my good sense kicks in. She's as bad without food as I am without morning coffee. I get off the bed, jump in my pants and head to the kitchen. I look through the menus and find the one from the Mexican place close by. It takes me a few minutes to decide what to order and I better hurry, before she comes out and discovers I've ordered nothing. One of our men can go get it. I grab the phone to place the order and frown.
