Stonehill series collect.., p.113
Stonehill Series Collection, page 113
“I like this already,” he said as Meg worked on releasing the key from the holder. “It’s very homey.”
She didn’t respond. She simply unlocked the door and pushed it open for him to step inside. They slid their boots off, and then she guided him into a big living room. The house was a little older, so it didn’t have the open concept that he’d been hoping for, but the vibe that rolled through him made this feel like home. The river stone fireplace needed a good scrubbing, but he could work with it—redo it, even. The flooring was manufactured wood but carried throughout and was obviously newer. The room was large enough that the big sofa in the middle didn’t fill the space, and the row of tall windows along the front brought in lots of natural light. He liked this house.
“The kitchen’s this way,” Meg said.
He followed her to a room with long white countertops and a table tucked into a dining area. The appliances could be newer, but they were clean and worked. The bedrooms were good sized, and the bathrooms had been updated. When they stepped out the sliding glass door to the backyard, Aiden warmed despite the cold outside.
“This is great.”
A tall privacy fence surrounded the yard. The cement patio had space for a grill and more than enough room for the family he didn’t yet have. He tried to ignore the lack of enthusiasm Meg had as she talked about the newer roof and dry basement, but it stung him every time she lamely gestured into a room and spewed facts like a bored gameshow host. He felt something in this house. A sense of belonging or a hope for the future. He couldn’t understand why she didn’t feel it too.
As he wandered the upstairs, he could almost see his life here. A feeling akin to déjà vu found him. Not that he had been there before but that he would be there in the future. And as he stood in the master bedroom with Meg leaning against the doorjamb watching him, he had a sense that she belonged there with him.
The feeling was so strong and unexpected it nearly took his breath away. He wondered if she felt it too when she pushed herself upright.
“Take your time,” she said dismissively. “I’ll be downstairs when you’re ready to look at the next one.”
He wanted to stop her, but he didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t exactly ask her if she felt the same connection to the house that he did. How could he expect her to? Aiden toured the smaller bedrooms alone. The rooms would be perfect for the children he didn’t even have.
Yet.
Before leaving, he returned to the living room to get a better look at the fireplace. Instead of focusing on the integrity of the structure, his attention fell on a photo of the family who lived there. A man and his wife sat with two children. Even though the photo was posed, their happiness was evident in their smiles.
Reality hit Aiden then. Everything fell into place. The real reason he’d returned home; the real reason he was so desperate to gain Meg’s forgiveness. His failure to make a life in New York was so much more than the traumas he’d seen. His failure had begun the moment he left Meg standing in their apartment with tears on her cheeks and so much hurt in her eyes.
He finally understood the depth of his mistake—what he had really walked away from. He had known all along, in his arm’s length way, that he’d lost the woman he loved and the future he had wanted with her. Standing here, in this house, looking at a photo that could have been them—should have been them—reality finally hit him. Like a kick to the gut.
The air in his lungs whooshed out of him, and he had to put his hand on the mantle to steady himself. All this time, he thought he just needed Meg’s understanding and forgiveness so he could forgive himself. He needed more than that. He needed her. Their future. Their family. Their Sunday mornings reading the paper in bed, making love in the afternoon, ignoring the rest of the world until they absolutely couldn’t anymore. Her laugher. He hadn’t heard her laugh in years. He missed the musical sound that filtered in and warmed his heart. He wanted her back. He wanted their life back. A life he didn’t deserve but suddenly understood that he couldn’t continue without.
“Aiden?”
He turned his head when she called out to him. The look on her face and the tone of her voice let him know it wasn’t the first time she’d said his name. He swallowed hard to resist the urge to pull her to him and hold her as he begged for another chance, begged her to believe in him again, and promised—swore—he’d never hurt her like he had before.
“Are you okay?” She started to reach out to him but stopped. “Do you need some water?”
Aiden had to fight to look away from her, but if he didn’t, she was going to see right through him. He focused on the photo again. “Uh, no. No. I’m fine.”
“You look like you could be sick.”
“No. I’m good. I, uh, I didn’t have breakfast.”
She moved to his side and scanned his face, as though searching for signs of illness. “Oh. Well, let’s get out of here and grab something to eat.”
“Yeah, that sounds good. That sounds great, actually.”
He glanced at the photo one more time. The happy family was like a sign from the universe that this was the house he needed to buy. This was his new home. The place where he would have the life he wanted. This was the place where he would win Meg back.
“Feeling better?” Meg asked. She was unsettled by how quiet he’d been. Whenever Aiden was quiet, he was overthinking something. When he overthought things, he usually did something stupid. Like moving away without her.
He finished his hamburger and brushed his hands together. “Much.”
“Good. So what did you think about the last place? You didn’t say much.”
“I liked it.”
She smiled. She had suspected as much the moment they walked in. The house was perfect. Absolutely perfect. If Aiden didn’t snatch it up, she might. She hadn’t been looking for a home to buy, but that one was too good to let go. She had walked through the rooms and could actually imagine having a life there. “Great,” she said. “Do you want to make an offer?”
“It’s only the second place I’ve looked at. Let’s check out the other place we picked out yesterday. It had a lot of potential.”
She looked out the window, and anxiety settled in her gut. Even if she wasn’t driving, she didn’t like how the slush was starting to stick to the asphalt. The third house on their list was on the outskirts of town. “The snow is still coming down. If we are going to head out there, we should get going.”
Aiden took a few of her fries and stuffed them in his mouth and then wiped his hands. He slid out of the booth and carried their tray to the trash can. Though Meg still felt nervous around him, she had relaxed quite a bit.
“So,” he said after they climbed into his vehicle, “I haven’t bought Phil and Mal anything for the baby yet, but I want to do something big.”
She glanced at him, hating that he had surprised her once again. She wouldn’t have guessed that Aiden even knew people gave baby gifts. “We already had a baby shower.”
“But I wasn’t there.”
“Well, the baby’s too little for beer and a foosball table, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
He laughed. “I’ve outgrown that. Kind of. I mean, I’ll still play if there’s a table around, but I don’t have one anymore. Of course,” he said as he grinned, “that last basement was big enough for a foosball tourney.”
She rolled her eyes dramatically. “Oh, you were terrible at that game.”
“What? I was a champion. I bet Phil plays. I’m going to have to ask him about that.”
He laughed and got a wistful look on his face, like he was imagining battling it out with his cousin while Mallory and…whatever woman he ended up with gossiped about whatever moms gossip about. The scene flashed through Meg’s mind, and a strange pang, something far too close to envy, hit her.
“I was going to get a gift certificate to some fancy hotel with a restaurant so they can have a night off while I keep the baby,” Aiden clarified, pulling her from her strange daydream.
A few moments passed before she fully understood what he’d said. He had an idea for a baby gift. A really good idea for a baby gift. She stared at him, furrowing her brow.
His excitement seemed to dim. “Is that a terrible idea? I mean, I know they’re not going to want to leave it—him or her—right way, but a gift certificate can be used anytime.”
She frowned, disappointed she hadn’t thought of that. “Actually, that’s a really great idea. Kind of blows my portable crib out of the water, doesn’t it?”
He grinned. “Well, I bring it up because…you know…I don’t think that I should keep a baby all night by myself. Yeah, I’m a doctor, but I’ve never been a babysitter. So I was thinking maybe you could help me out with that?”
She rolled her eyes. “Oh. But you get all the credit, I suppose.”
“Well, it was my idea.”
“Mmm-hmm. Whose idea was it really?”
The shocked look on his face was as fake as his attempt to pass the idea off as his. “What? Like I can’t be creative?” He laughed when she lifted a brow at him. “Okay, I looked up baby shower ideas online. I liked that one.”
“Okay. You ante up half the money and half the babysitting. I’ll do my half, and it’s from both of us.” As soon as she said that, she stuttered. Couples gave gifts “from both of us,” not two individuals who were…whatever she and Aiden were.
“I can deal with that,” he said, saving her from her straying thoughts.
They filled the drive with a debate about hotels and restaurants before paring down to two options they agreed to check out later—but not too much later since Mallory’s due date was fast approaching. Meg practically squealed at the thought of holding the baby and confessed her plans to spoil the kid rotten. She couldn’t stop herself from laughing. She even clapped her hands and bounced a little.
“He’s going to be here before we know it. I can’t wait.” She glanced at him, and her smile fell. He was giving her the same look she figured she’d given him earlier—a complete WTF look. “What?”
“What?”
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I’ve missed your laugh,” he said.
Her stomach twisted and her heart skipped. She had to turn away.
“Sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“You didn’t.”
Actually, he had, but mostly because she couldn’t pinpoint why her brain was going to such forbidden places. She decided to blame Mallory. Ever since she got married and started a family, Meg had this nagging in her heart. It felt like it was time for her to do the same. She wasn’t even dating anyone! Why would she think about having a family? That was insane. But what was even crazier was that Aiden should fit in to that in any capacity.
“I’d really like it if we can be on an even keel,” Meg blurted out. “Mallory was right when she said we have to put our past behind us so we can be there for the baby. I don’t know what that means for us. I don’t know if I want to be friends, or acquaintances, or…just two people who are nice to each other when we have to be. I do know that I don’t want to keep hanging on to this anger. But I also know that I’ll never be more than a friend. That’s not going to happen, so if anywhere in your mind you are thinking we’re going to get back together, forget it, okay?”
He looked at her, and she was certain she saw disappointment on his face, but he scoffed as if dismissing her statement. “All I said was I missed your laugh. Geez.”
Aiden could deny it all he wanted, but Meg had seen through his façade. God. What did he think? He’d just strut back into town and she’d forget that he’d been a complete jerk? That he should have stayed a loner? That he didn’t want or need her?
“There.” She pointed as a house came into view.
He parked, and she hopped out before he could do something stupid like acknowledge that the air between them had grown tense again. She was opening the front door by the time he joined her.
“Nice,” she said, looking around the contemporary styled house.
The walls were gray and the trim crisp and white. The open concept was something he had said he was looking for, but as he wandered through the big empty rooms, he seemed detached from the surroundings. The last house they’d looked at had brought out smiles and plans. He was quiet as he took in this space.
“Damn it,” she said under her breath as she looked at him across the living room of the empty house. For a while she had forgotten that he’d done all those things. For a few moments today, things had felt normal between them. For a second or two, she had wanted things to be back to the way they were. She’d wanted him to want her back. She’d wanted to live in that house with him. With their children. She’d wanted the life he had promised her so long ago.
But the past was right there, reminding her that it was a bad idea to let him in. No, scratch that. It was a terrible, horrible, no-good idea, and she needed to forget it right now. Reminding him, and herself, that she wasn’t going back down that road was her only defense, and she had jumped at it, but now she felt bad because she’d clearly hurt his feelings. He’d quieted down after her declaration.
“Well?” she asked, her question bouncing off the walls.
He slowly spun one more time before shaking his head. “I don’t think so.”
She wished he’d just make an offer on the last house they’d looked at and be done with it. He hadn’t had a bad thing to say about it. He liked the colors, the kitchen, the finished basement, the fenced-in yard…everything. Even so, she asked, “Would you like to go back to the office and look at a few more listings?”
“Yeah, let’s do that.”
“Okay.” She sighed and led him from toward the front door.
“You don’t want to?” he asked as she locked the door and returned the key to the secure box.
With the key locked away, they headed for his vehicle. “You liked the last house. You’re going to buy the last house. You know and I know it, so let’s make an offer on it.”
“I want to make sure it’s the right one.”
They climbed in, and she focused on latching her seat belt. “It’s in the perfect location. The price is well within your budget. It had all the things on your list of wants. And I saw on your face that you wanted it. Stop being so wishy-washy and go for it.”
As he started down the poorly paved road, he turned on the wipers to swipe away the huge snowflakes that just kept coming. “I’m not being wishy-washy. This is a big decision. I don’t want to rush it.”
She was about to push back when he hit a patch of ice, causing the SUV to slide toward the edge of the road. Aiden managed to keep his cool as he lost control. He didn’t slam on the brake or jerk the wheel, but the vehicle just kept sliding. There were no guardrails between the road and the ditch—just a steep, snow-covered drop-off that looked increasingly dangerous as they approached it. Meg braced herself but was thrown forward and then bounced to the right. Her seat belt jerked, preventing her from going toward the dash, but she cried out when the side of her head cracked against the window.
It happened so quickly. Within a few heartbeats, the car slammed to a stop, nose first in the ditch, and Aiden put his hand to her arm. “Are you okay?”
She winced as she put her fingers to her forehead. The pain was sharp and intense, so much so that it took a moment for her to register the cut on the bone just above her eyebrow. “I think I’m bleeding.”
“Look at me.” He unhooked his seat belt and pushed her hand away. Holding her chin, he angled her head to get a better look at her injury. His panicked eyes skimmed over her brow. “You’re going to need stitches in that.”
“Great.”
After jerking his scarf from around his neck, he balled it up and handed it to her. “Put some pressure on it.”
“With your scarf?”
“Do you have something better?”
She put the material to her head and winced as she pressed against her wound.
“I’ve got a first aid kit in the back.”
Meg widened her eyes and let her mouth gape open with shock. “You’re going to give me stitches now?” she practically screamed.
The worry on his face eased into a slight smile. “No. But trust me, you’re going to want an aspirin. Is it just your head? Is anything else hurt?”
“No, I’m good. You?” She hadn’t even considered if he’d been hurt. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Sit tight.”
He pushed the door opened and climbed out into the cold. While he walked around the back and released the hatch, she flipped the visor down and looked at her head. She thought she could get away with a butterfly stitch; however, the scar would be significantly less noticeable if the wound were stitched closed properly. Damn it.
“How bad is it out there?” she asked after he climbed back into the driver’s seat.
“I don’t think I can get us out of here.”
She started digging for her phone. “I can make some calls.”
“Let me look at that first. I may be able to push us out, but I want to bandage this before I do anything else.”
Meg closed her eyes when he gently touched her face. Despite the coolness of his skin, heat rushed through her. She didn’t want to react to him, but she couldn’t help it. No matter what had happened, how much time had passed, her body remembered his touch and wanted more of it. That was dumb and dangerous.
He gently touched along her hairline. “Does that hurt?”
Meg appreciated the reminder that his touches weren’t of a personal nature. “No.”
