Stonehill series collect.., p.122
Stonehill Series Collection, page 122
“Oh,” she gasped. “Aiden, this is so beautiful.”
“Are you sure? If you don’t—”
“I love it,” she stated before he could imply otherwise. “I absolutely love it. Thank you.” She looked at him, and her eyes said all he needed to know. She really did love it. And she loved him. He could see the affection shining. She set the box aside and held the bracelet out to him. “Help me?”
He unhooked the little clasp and wrapped the chain around her wrist before securing it. “Perfect,” he said. Bringing her hand to his lips, he kissed her knuckles. “Just like you.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. “Thank you.” She planted a soft kiss on his lips. “I’m so happy I’m here with you tonight.”
He had to swallow the surge of emotions her words brought. “I am too, Meg. More than you can ever know.”
She nodded toward the kitchen. “I think those steaks are nearing medium well.”
“Oh, shit.” He rushed around the counter to check on their dinner.
Meg couldn’t have asked for a better Valentine’s Day date with Aiden. He’d made everything so damned perfect. She was a puddle of mush inside. As they finished putting their dishes in the sink, he suggested they watch a movie, but she had other plans for the evening.
This thing between them was growing every day. The more time she spent with him, the more time she wanted to spend with him. Denying that this was going anywhere but where she had been fantasizing was pointless. So was denying that she wanted him so much she could barely see straight whenever she was around him.
So when he turned to head toward the living room where the television had been mounted on the wall, Meg grabbed his wrist and stopped him. He looked at her curiously, and she felt her cheeks warm. She never used to be so bold, but this was just one of the many changes he was going to have to get used to. She had learned to go after what she wanted, and right now, she wanted him.
“I don’t want to watch a movie,” she said.
Aiden’s lips twitched. “Oh. Well, what do you want to do?”
She could tell he was testing her, so she smiled and answered honestly. “I want to go upstairs and have sex. Preferably with you.”
He chuckled, clearly shocked, but he recovered quickly. “Since I’m the only other person here, I guess I’ll have to do.”
“I guess so. Think you’re up for it?”
Another laugh slipped from him. “I’m sure I can rise to the occasion.”
This time she giggled and pulled him to her. Letting the amusement and teasing fade from her smile, she lightly touched his cheek and kissed him. “I want you,” she whispered against his lips. “If you’re ready.”
“I’m ready.” Wrapping his arms around her, he pulled her hips to his. His erection confirmed what he’d said. “I’m more than ready.”
“So take me upstairs,” she breathed. Her heart started to race as he brought her hand to his lips. A moment later, he turned and guided her toward the stairs. As Meg finally gave in to what she had been fighting for so long, she couldn’t hold back. Every emotion she’d been hiding erupted within her, suddenly making her nervous about what she had been so adamant that she wanted.
They walked into his bedroom, and he spun her. “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.”
That was all she needed to say. He pressed his mouth to hers, and all the tenderness his previous kisses had contained dissolved. His mouth was demanding and hungry, as if he’d been starving for her. His tongue slid between her lips and his fingertips dug into her as he crushed her against him. He eased the clip from her hair, letting the long strands fall so he could brush his fingers through them.
All the anger about their breakup, the desperation of missing him for so many years, all the love, the longing, and need, came pouring out of her as she hungrily kissed him. Pulling him closer, she gave him all the unspoken permission she could. This was going to happen. This was happening.
He slid his hand down her side to her thigh and under the flowy material of her skirt. His hands were hot against her, scorching her. She wanted more. She turned her head, letting his lips move to her neck, where he gave her the same passionate treatment. Running her fingers through his hair, she focused on the heat and wanting radiating through her.
Aiden lifted her just enough to carry her across his room and lay her on his bed. Almost instantly, his body crushed her against the mattress. His weight and heat were almost too much, but at the same time she didn’t think they could ever be enough. All she wanted to think about right then was the love Aiden was offering her.
Easing down her body, Aiden assaulted her breast through her thin shirt, roughly teasing her nipple with his hot mouth through the barrier while tugging her skirt up her leg. Sighing when she finally felt his warm skin against her, she moaned his name.
He massaged her thigh as he continued trailing his kisses lower. Meg swallowed hard and closed her eyes when his breath warmed her stomach. Moving her hands from his shoulders, she reached above her head and wrapped her fingers around the bars of the headboard. The moment his kiss fell on the inside of her thigh, she knew there was no going back. Not that she wanted to.
Aiden gripped her hips and lifted her body to him as he ran his nose along the center of her panties, inhaling deeply before pressing his mouth against her. Meg hissed and tightened her hold on the wrought iron that was keeping her grounded. He kissed her thigh again and then gently nipped her skin with his teeth, causing her to gasp and thrust her hips up.
Sliding his hand up her leg, he pressed his thumb in a slow circular motion, obviously determined to torture her. “Aiden,” she panted. “You’re being an asshole.”
He laughed softly. “I know.”
“So stop.” She exhaled a trembling breath when he moved the material aside and dragged his tongue over her. “Oh, that’s better. That’s so much better.”
He took his time, as if remembering her scent and taste, before he finally sat back. They were both breathless, and the air of teasing was gone. This was serious business now. She reached for the buttons of his shirt, quickly undid them, and then pushed the material off his shoulders. When he tossed his shirt to the floor, she moved to the button of his slacks. Aiden rolled over onto his back and pushed his pants down, removing his boxers and socks at the same time, and then tossed it all to the side.
As he did that, Meg lifted her shirt over her head and then fell back to shove her skirt down. When he rolled back to her, she was there, in the black satin bra and panty set she’d bought just for this moment.
“Jesus,” he breathed. “You’re so perfect, Meg.” Rolling onto his side, he used her hip to roll her into him. “I don’t know how I ever found the strength to walk away from you.”
“Shh,” she hushed, pressing her fingertips to his lips. “It’s in the past now. It’s all in the past.”
“I missed you so much I couldn’t breathe sometimes,” he whispered. “I was such a fucking fool. I won’t be again. I swear to you, I will never make the same mistakes again.”
“I believe you, Aiden.”
“I want to make love to you.”
She grinned. “I’d like that very much.”
Reaching behind her, he released the clasp keeping her bra in place and caught her exposed breast with his hand. Moving down, he covered her nipple with his mouth as he pushed her back on the pillows. A moan escaped from deep within her as he moved between her legs, crushing her with his weight. A moment later, he tugged her bra completely free, and she dug her hands in his hair as he suckled her breasts.
“Tell me you have condoms,” she whispered.
He stretched over her to get into the drawer of his nightstand. While he put protection in place, she removed her panties and leaned back, parting her legs as he returned to her. When she lifted her hips, her body all but begged for him, practically pleaded for him to finish what he had started.
Pulling her arms from his shoulders, he pinned them above her head and looked down at her. His expression seemed to mirror her own emotional turmoil needing to be released, needing to go somewhere before it exploded. She leaned up and kissed him, gently biting his lip, tugging his mouth toward hers. Slipping his tongue into her mouth, he dueled with her momentarily before leaning back enough to see her face.
Meg held his intense stare as he thrust into her. Holy crap… He still fit so perfectly inside her body. She wanted to cry from the happiness of having him there again. Wrapping her legs around his, she welcomed each thrust. Over and over again, she rolled her hips to meet him, only stopping when she felt like her mind was separating from her body.
She closed her eyes and grunted as an orgasm rolled through her. Her lungs seemed to stop working until she finally managed to gasp for air. Aiden groaned as he rolled onto his back, taking her with him. Straddling him, Meg rolled her head back as she ground against him. When he roughly squeezed her breasts, she looked down at him, finding an even more intense look on his face. He didn’t have to say what he was thinking. Evan after all this time, she could read his mind and his body. He was nearing the edge and wanted her to jump off with him.
She put her hands on his chest for support while she moved faster and harder, helped by the hands that had held her hips. He thrust up and threw his arms around her, pulling her to him, and she knew he was about to finish. The thought that she could still bring him pleasure carried her with him and a second climax rocked through her.
True to the teasing he’d given her, she sank her teeth into his shoulder as she cried out. Not hard enough to hurt the poor man, just enough to keep her from losing her damn mind from the pleasure that was literally taking her breath away.
When she was finally able to relax, Meg swallowed hard as the emotions that had been brought to the surface were at the boiling point. She had to close her eyes and take a long slow breath to keep her tears at bay, but she couldn’t stop the shaky breath that escaped her. She couldn’t remember another time in her life when she had felt so much all at once. She wasn’t sure where it was coming from or what to do with it. All she knew was that it was consuming her. Trying to control herself, she held him tighter and buried her face in his shoulder.
Wrapping his arms securely around her, Aiden kissed the top of her head, holding her until his breath returned to normal. Running his hand through her hair, he kissed her head again. “I love you. More than anything in this world. Do you know that?”
“I do.”
He hugged her even closer. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be so rough with you.”
“You weren’t.” Meg shook her head as she lost the battle and her entire body shuddered with a sob. “It’s Mallory’s fault.”
He stroked her hair. “Maybe we shouldn’t talk about Mallory right now.”
“I never used to cry. She did this to me.” She sat back. “I’m sorry. I’m just… I don’t know how to explain it.”
He pulled her even closer. “Overwhelmed?”
“I guess.”
“Me too,” he whispered and kissed her head. “Are you sorry this happened?”
“No.” Leaning back, she looked down at him. “Are you?”
“Are you kidding? This is the happiest I’ve been in a long time.” When she laughed, he smiled and brushed her hair from her face. “That’s not what I meant. What I meant was having you here in my arms, loving me, makes me happy.”
“I knew what you meant.”
“I love you, Megumi.”
Smiling as another sob escaped her, she kissed him. “I love you. So much. But if you leave me again, I’ll never forgive you.”
“I know.” He pulled her back to him. He didn’t say the words, but she knew that was his way of promising her he wasn’t letting her go again.
Chapter 15
Meg jolted when she felt movement next to her. She needed a moment to orient herself, but once she did, she remembered falling asleep in Aiden’s bed. Rolling onto her side to face him, she watched him run his fingers through his hair. He huffed out a long deep breath that sounded far more stressed than she would have expected, given they’d made love earlier.
Her heart twisted in her chest. She didn’t want to keep doubting him. She believed that he wanted to be with her, that he loved her, but she couldn’t forget that she had believed that once before. When he pushed himself up and disappeared into the bathroom, the doubt in the back of her mind started to crush down on her.
She knew this feeling. This was something she had experienced far too often in her life. She used to let it consume her. This was the feeling that had dragged her down so low that her life imploded. Fighting this self-doubt was a constant struggle, even now, but she had learned that she had to fight it if she didn’t want to drown in it.
Pushing herself out of the warmth and comfort of his bed, she followed him. Taking a deep breath, she knocked on the door. “Aiden? Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’ll be out in a minute.”
He didn’t sound okay. His voice was tight, strained. Stressed. She just hoped it wasn’t because he regretted the steps they’d taken. Looking at the bracelet on her arm, focusing on the little heart charm, she tried to tell herself that he wouldn’t have bought her the gift if he weren’t serious about moving forward with her.
But damn those voices in the back of her mind.
She returned to the bed and turned on the dim side table light. Fluffing her pillow, she set it against the headboard and leaned against it, fiddling with the charm on her wrist as she waited for him to return. When he did, the anxiety on his face was obvious. Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach.
“What is it?” she asked, terrified to hear his answer.
He offered her a weak smile, and she could have sworn it was the exact same look her gave her all those years ago. “I just don’t sleep well these days,” he said.
She didn’t believe him. The look on his face was more than restlessness. “Aiden?”
He slipped under the sheet and scooted closer until he could rest his cheek on her thigh. Suddenly the fear that he was going to leave her faded and she realized there was something else going through his mind. He pressed himself so closely to her, she thought he must be trying to crawl inside her body. That was another feeling she was too familiar with.
She used to wish she could hide inside him. She’d sit in his lap and he’d hold her, and all her problems would fade. He hadn’t even known that’s what he was doing for her, and she felt the need to do that for him now. Wrapping her arm around him as much as she could, she tried to soothe him with her touch.
“Talk to me,” she whispered. “What’s wrong?”
Aiden sighed and burrowed his head deeper into her lap. “I’m haunted, Meg. Truly haunted.”
“By what?”
He tightened his hold on her. “You were right. About the shit I’d see in New York. That I wasn’t emotionally prepared to deal with those kinds of things. Rapes, gangs, child abuse and neglect, human trafficking. And I don’t mean once in a while. I mean every day. Every goddamned day, Meg. And I couldn’t do anything to save them. I could tend to their injuries, but I couldn’t save them.”
“I’m sorry,” she said.
He was quiet for a moment before continuing. “There was this little girl. Her name was Anita. She was beautiful and so sweet. She had these big brown eyes and long brown hair. She reminded me of you in some ways. I think that’s why I felt so responsible for her. After the second time she was brought to the ER, I started to suspect abuse. After the third time, I went to my supervisor so we could file a report. I told her she was going to be safe. I promised her that she would okay. I guess I thought the system would protect her.”
Meg bit her lip. She didn’t have to think too hard to know where his story was headed. She stroked his back and tried to comfort him.
“The next time she was rushed in, her bastard of a father had beaten her so bad her skull was fractured.”
“Oh, Aiden,” she whispered.
“I visited her every day until she died. I told her how sorry I was, but…that didn’t matter, Meg. Nothing I did mattered. She died. I should have prevented that.”
“No,” she insisted. “Aiden.” She pulled him until he shifted enough to look up at her. Her heart broke at the reflection of tears in his eyes. “You tried. You filed a report. You did what you could.”
“It wasn’t enough.” He rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. “Coming home wasn’t just about fixing things in my family or even reconciling with you. Nothing I did there was enough. Nothing I did there would ever be enough. I couldn’t process that kind of failure day after day, Meg. I’d lose my mind if I had to spend the rest of my life patting broken people on the head and sending them on their way, knowing nothing I’d done had made a damn bit of difference.”
“You made a difference,” she insisted.
He draped his arm over his face as if to hide from her. “No. I didn’t. I wanted to, but I didn’t. Whenever I close my eyes, I see them. I see the hundreds of broken and battered people I failed. When I sleep, I hear little Anita crying because she’d been hurt by her parents. Again. I see her,” he whispered.
Meg had to swallow her tears when his voice broke.
“I see her in my sleep. She’s going to haunt me forever. And I deserve to be haunted.”
“Stop,” she insisted. Sliding down in the bed, she pulled him onto his side so she could see his face. Stroking his cheek, forcing him to look at her, she said, “You did what you could. You aren’t a social worker, Aiden. You aren’t the police. You’re a doctor, and your job is to report abuse. Which you did. The system failed her. Society failed her. Not you.”
He didn’t believe her. She could see in his eyes that he didn’t believe her, but he seemed to appreciate her effort. Sliding to her, he hugged her close and kissed her head.
“I’m so happy you’re here,” he said softly. “You can’t begin to imagine how much I regretted letting you go. I needed you so much more than I ever wanted to believe.”
